I often see people celebrating marriage on the internet, but it is rare to celebrate divorce like this. After all, for most women, divorce is a fatal blow, which hurts a lot, losing feelings, losing marriage and family, and facing secular finger pointing. In the end, all that remains is trouble and pain. So some netizens questioned whether Ms. Zhou really felt happy after divorce.
In my opinion, some people are unhappy in marriage and some are happy in divorce. In the final analysis, it is the difference between initiative and passivity. Any active person has a goal. Whether married or divorced, he will be relaxed and happy. For a totally inappropriate marriage, divorce is a kind of happiness, a happy choice and a happy choice.
Therefore, I think Ms. Zhou's happiness is real.
After divorce, women are usually happier than men.
Researchers at Kingston University in the United Kingdom once conducted a survey. They asked 65,438+00,000 Britons aged 65,438+06 to 60 to rate their life satisfaction before and after divorce. After 20 years of investigation, it is concluded that after divorce, although women have more negative economic effects, they are still happier than men, and women are more satisfied with their divorced life than men.
Why is this happening? Some people say that women are happier because most divorces are initiated by women.
I think there is some truth in this statement.
Heidi's sexology report "Women" mentioned that most of the people who decided to divorce and asked for divorce were women. 9 1% divorced women said that it was themselves who decided to divorce, not their husbands.
In marriage, women are usually in a weak position, and unless there is an unbearable situation, they will not easily file for divorce. Once they decide to divorce, it shows that they have imagined their future life countless times. They are usually more likely to accept the reality, accept a new life and be happy.
Women dare to take the initiative to propose divorce, either with certain economic strength or independent ability to support themselves or their children.
Like Ms. Zhou in the news, I think she must have suffered a lot in her marriage and must be an independent woman. So she got the divorce certificate, felt happy to break free from the cage, and believed that she could live the life she wanted. That's why she held a celebration dinner. This ritual divorce can be seen as a farewell to the past and a welcome to a new life.
Although many women are trapped in unhappy marriages and cannot extricate themselves for one reason or another, don't underestimate the courage and ability of women to get out of unhappy marriages and pursue happiness.
A friend of mine, who has been married for almost 20 years, was despised by her husband's family for a long time because she gave birth to a daughter. Her husband is always finding fault with her, even having an affair with a woman outside. She wanted a divorce a long time ago, but for the sake of her daughter, she kept putting up with it.
But she never gave up the idea of divorce, always planned when she could divorce, and finally divorced her daughter without hesitation after the college entrance examination. At the moment she got the divorce certificate, she sent a photo embracing the sunshine in a circle of friends and wrote: I can finally live for myself again, looking forward to it! The feeling of yearning for future life can be felt through the screen.
In her 50 s, she almost went out clean, rented a single room with a little savings, and then went out to travel with the remaining thousands of dollars. I came back a week later and found a job with no basic salary, running business during the day and setting up stalls at night. In fact, her monthly retirement salary is 1000 yuan, but she is more willing to work to earn money. She said that although she is very hard, she feels very happy, and she has never been happy for decades.
Later, she and her friends started a domestic company in partnership, and her life was busy and full.
"Marriage is not necessarily for happiness, divorce must be", which is more suitable for friends. Women divorce just to find their own happiness. For them, the rest of their lives is also a new life, which is worth celebrating.
Most women will feel relaxed and happy after deciding to divorce, but they may feel sad and guilty when considering and deciding.
I interviewed several divorced female netizens, and Jiang Mumu told me, "Divorce is the most definite decision in my life. My ex-husband ignored his family and didn't bring money back for several years. He is addicted to gambling and will hit people. Afraid of hurting the elderly and children, I have been hesitant to divorce. When I finally decided to divorce after the last straw, I felt as relaxed as a heavy burden. Special thanks to my friends who have given me great support. "
A Zi said, "I want a divorce because I am very unhappy. I'll get a divorce. I finally realized that I was not wrong. Sometimes, I feel like a loser, even though I know I'm not. After the divorce, I have an unprecedented feeling that I am free and I can easily be myself. "
Except for women who file for divorce on impulse, most of them can't stand it at last, or men's infidelity or repeated infidelity, or men's irresponsible gambling and drinking, or men's long-term neglect of themselves and loss of confidence. Once they make up their minds to divorce, they will be completely injured and hope to get rid of it as soon as possible. After divorce, they will feel more relaxed than ever before.
Conclusion:
In a word, the reason why women are divorced and happy is actually very simple, that is: end the past and look forward to the future.
Writing this article is not to encourage women to divorce, but to tell women from another angle that ending an unfortunate marriage, although bitter and helpless, will also gain the strength and happiness to start over.
Finally, remind women that the ultimate goal of divorce is to live a better life. Therefore, before divorce, we must think about how to go after divorce. After divorce, you must know how to reflect on your mistakes in a failed marriage and spend more energy to discover your true self. Only in this way can you really start your happy life.