Is this educational concept really good? This square face is noncommittal, but for a person's personality development, from naive to mature, square face thinks this is a very bad start.
Whether your intention is good or bad, to make his life more competitive, or to pave a smooth road for him, the first thing you teach him to do is to look at people with colored glasses.
Everyone has a personality benchmark in his heart. You may appreciate and admire those who reach this benchmark, and you will become friends with those who live in the same standard as you. But those who are below this benchmark, you will not only refuse to associate with them, but also sneer at them. This is the "bad" of human nature.
It sounds smart to divide people into three classes, six classes and nine classes, and divide circles with your own biased eyes, but in fact it is to draw the ground into a prison. Are those people outside your circle really inferior to you? Are those people you despise really unworthy of association?
I never think that people are classified, but personality and soul are indeed classified. What I despise most are those who are self-reliant and noble, and those who keep silent and look down on others.
Self-reliance is noble, arrogant to others, only dealing with people of their own class, with a proud advantage, they can look down on others at will. Such people are the most sad, and their souls have no depth. Shallow people may follow suit, and smart people can see the filth of their personality at a glance.
How good can those who keep their mouths shut and look down on others be? They divide people into classes and look down on the lower classes. They thought that some upper-class people would look down on them snobs. What is the difference? Just a frog at the bottom of a well, with a narrow vision and a short pattern.
Don't look down on anyone, let alone take yourself too seriously, otherwise your shallowness will be revealed, and those who look down on others are the most despised.
A few days ago, I received a private letter from a reader, Xiao Yong. He told me his own story, and confessed to me that he was possessed by a ghost for a while. For his own selfish interests, he almost became a baiwenhang against his conscience. But in the end, he still pulled back from the brink, and after many struggles, he did not violate his original heart. Let's hear what kind of story he has.
Xiao Yong ridiculed himself as an out-and-out "Phoenix Man". He confessed to me that he used to think that his own strength was not enough to change his destiny, so he had to rely on marriage to help him jump from a pheasant to a phoenix bird with colorful feathers. But in the end, he got the chance, but gave it up at the last minute.
Xiao Yong's family is very poor, and his parents are farmers for generations. He plows in spring and harvests in autumn, and he is not a big agricultural family. He can't sell much money except growing enough food for himself. When farm work is not busy, my father will go out to do odd jobs to earn some extra money, and my mother will also do some crafts and weave some bamboo baskets to subsidize the family.
Xiao Yong had a carefree childhood. He used to be very naughty, chasing chickens and driving dogs, and he was happy without material things. But such a time is gone forever after all, and people will grow up. Xiao Yong followed his mother to visit a big city where his father worked in a summer vacation. He ate foreign fast food for the first time, made an amusement park for the first time and saw the prosperity of a big city for the first time. Compared with the prosperity of his hometown, it is completely different.
Xiao Yong doesn't want to farm or be stuck in a small city all his life. He is clever and studious, but he never has a goal. From then on, his goal is that one day, the children in those cities can play with things that are no longer extravagant, and he wants to be the master.
Reading is the only way for him to realize his dream. He redoubled his efforts, graduated from junior high school with excellent results and was admitted to the best middle school in the county. After six years of cold window, I finally got into a famous university and chose the best major in the school. Xiao Yong was not in a hurry to find a job after graduation, but was admitted to the graduate school for further study.
Perhaps it is because of Xiao Yong's obsession with high society, but also because of his cleverness and persistence. Xiao Yong, as an excellent student representative, is highly appreciated by professors, and also for earning some pocket money. Xiao Yong works as a teaching assistant for his younger brothers and sisters, and also takes this opportunity to let him know his girlfriend Xiaoyan.
Xiaoyan is a junior, three years younger than Xiao Yong. She looks very white, but her facial features are average and ugly, but she is outgoing. She was attracted by Xiao Yong, a serious and excellent teaching assistant, so she boldly pursued Xiao Yong, regardless of it.
Xiao Yong told Xiaoyan that at first she just thought she was like her sister studying in her hometown, so she paid more attention to her, but gradually she was attracted by Xiaoyan's cheerfulness and liveliness. Xiaoyan is not good-looking, but in Xiao Yong's view, the freckles on the girl's face are very cute.
More importantly, Xiaoyan's family is very rich, the locals live in a famous rich area, and both parents are engaged in the financial industry. Xiao Yong didn't disclose much about her specific occupation, only that she was the management of the company and had certain influence.
Of course, this is only after Xiao Yong and Xiaoyan are together. When Xiao Yong knew this, he felt that the opportunity he had been waiting for had finally come. The woman he loves and the strong family background are just what he needs. He wants to climb higher and there is no more convenient way to go.
Less than half a year after falling in love, Xiaoyan couldn't wait to take Xiao Yong home to introduce her parents. At first, Xiaoyan's parents were quite dissatisfied when they knew about Xiao Yong's family situation, but they admired Xiao Yong personally and finally acquiesced in their daughter's love.
After Xiao Yong graduated, his future father-in-law also used some connections to help Xiao Yong find a decent job. For this matter, Xiao Yong thinks that even if his father-in-law helps, he is fully qualified for the job. Can't say it's all his father-in-law. Even if he finds it himself, he may work harder and spend more energy, but he may not be unable to find it.
But in any case, Xiao Yong did rely on his girlfriend's parents to remove many difficult obstacles in his life. He is not an ungrateful man. He is very kind to his girlfriend and respects his mother-in-law.
This year, the two finally reached the point of talking about marriage. However, their parents' first meeting didn't go well. Xiao Yong's parents are honest people, so they are very stiff in front of their rich in-laws at first sight, and even can't say anything. What was supposed to be a meeting between the two sides became the talk of the woman's parents, and there was no progress at all.
Xiao Yong's parents just sat there apologizing, and the scene was very embarrassing, at least in Xiao Yong's view. Even after dinner, Xiao Yong blamed his parents for being too bad at getting along with others, and Xiao Yong's parents felt guilty.
"Son, my parents can't talk, but our hearts are like mirrors. I can see that your parents-in-law are very good, and the girl is also good. We won't hold you back. No matter what they want, even if we sell iron and blood, my parents will fix you up. Don't worry. "
Xiao Yong grumbled and couldn't say a word, and his heart was sour.
After seeing her parents off, her parents-in-law called Xiao Yong back. The bride price of 200 thousand yuan, as well as other houses and cars that are very valuable to Xiao Yong's family, were abandoned by her mother-in-law On the contrary, she said that she would give Xiao Yong 200,000 yuan, but they had one condition.
"Xiao Yong, you are a good boy. We understand the harsh conditions in your family. Your uncle and I just discussed it. We don't want 200 thousand bride price. Our house and cars are all paid for by our family. We don't want your family to pay for this. Our family will marry him for 200 thousand, but we have one condition: you can't be a door-to-door son-in-law Don't think too much. We know that you are the only man in the family, and our conditions are not so outrageous.
You know, our family are all relatives of dignitaries. To tell the truth, our family can't afford to lose face and let others know about our in-laws. How to mix in your own circle in the future? "
Xiao Yong felt a bitter taste after hearing this. The terms offered by his parents-in-law are very generous. This request is really not that difficult, but he feels extremely sad and feels that something is wrong. He did not directly agree to his parents-in-law's request, saying that he would go back and think about it.
But when he was psychologically prepared to tell his parents, his mouth seemed to be stuck and he couldn't open it. He dared not look his parents in the eye, lowered his head and tried to repeat a simple sentence.
After listening to Xiao Yong's words, Xiao Yong's parents were silent for a long time and agreed. Taking care of Xiao Yong's mood, parents said easily.
"Son, it doesn't matter. Anyway, my parents are old and can't talk. It doesn't matter if they don't join in the excitement. It's still leisure time. Your parents-in-law have arranged it, so we don't have to worry. It's good. As long as you can live well, it will be fine. "
Finally, I added, don't forget to carve a wedding video for me. However, the sadness in parents' eyes still failed to escape Xiao Yong's eyes. He gave a cry, afraid to look at his parents again, and ran out of the house as if he had escaped.
On the wedding day, as the groom's official, he had mixed feelings. Everyone envies Xiao Yong's good luck. Xiao Yong paralyzed his nerves. During the day, he listened to all kinds of flattery from people who once despised him. This is what he wants. He is promoted step by step, but he is not happy from the bottom of his heart. But it's no use crying over spilled milk. He can only hide his complicated feelings.
It was not until a blind guest asked where the groom's parents were that Xiao Yong had no time to think about how to answer, but his mother-in-law took the lead in helping Xiao Yong answer.
"His parents don't want to come, they haven't seen the world, and they don't know where to put their hands at such an occasion. They just won't come. What can we do? Country people just can't afford a table. "
The mother-in-law and the guests burst into laughter, which may be harmless, but it sounded harsh to Xiao Yong. Suddenly, an idea came into his mind that he could not get married. If he does, he will never look up to see his parents again.
Xiao Yong slowly took off the corsage worn by the groom on his chest, fell to the ground in public and said directly, "I'm not getting married." Say that finish, he turned and left. In the stunned eyes of my parents-in-law's girlfriend and all the guests, Xiao Yong pushed open the door of the banquet hall and disappeared without looking back.
Xiaoyong is so clever that he doesn't know that he is ruining his future, but he told me that after he completed this impulsive and amazing move, the big stone that had been in his heart for a long time suddenly disappeared, and he didn't regret what he had done.
To tell you the truth, I admire Xiao Yong very much. Nowadays, Xiao Yong is not the only one who climbs to the top by climbing high branches, and it is not a case that he sells his soul and personality by any means to achieve his goal. This situation is very common, but is it correct?
Of course not. When everyone is used to it, regardless of right or wrong, only considering interests, thinking that the process is not important and the result is the most important, they also lose their highest ideals.
As Xiao Yong said, if he really gets married today, he will not only get 200,000 yuan, but also lose more precious things, such as the bottom line and principles, soul and personality. What's the difference between him and a walking corpse?
Some people may think that Xiao Yong is stupid, but I think he is very real and respectable. He experienced the struggles and hardships of life, and finally kept his original heart. This is the most precious place in this boy. I hope Xiaoyan's parents can understand this and don't blame the boy's impulse.
Xiaoyan's parents look down on rural in-laws and think they are superior. This kind of thought is what Yan Fang calls the worst personality. Even though their family is rich and awesome, Yan Fang still looks down on them, because their hearts are ugly and narrow, and they simply don't understand the value of respect.
Throughout the ages, people with noble personalities have always been virtuous corporal, never relying on their own merits. Those who are self-centered and proud will eventually wait for their fate to fall high in the clouds and be trampled underfoot by people who once looked down on themselves. In the end, they didn't understand the real reason for their failure.
In fact, the reason is very simple. All beings are equal, but the soul is noble and humble. Only those who know how to respect can get a glimpse of the true meaning of life.