No matter how the other person expresses love, the core is love. Some time ago, I received a letter from a reader, telling me a particularly wonderful thing, which is about this "red envelope etiquette". The protagonist didn't handle the method of issuing red envelopes well, which led to his girlfriend's divorce. In fact, it is a pity that because of this incident, the marriage that was already close at hand was greatly affected, and even later he still could not understand why he divorced.
Wang Guangwen is 28 years old. He grew up in a poor small county. His parents are ordinary workers, both of whom work in garment factories. After graduating from college, Wang Guangwen went to a company in Shenzhen as a white-collar worker. His salary is average, but it is the lowest standard in Shenzhen. Usually, he also works part-time to earn some extra money. Wang Guangwen met a girlfriend in Shenzhen. Her girlfriend is from Shenzhen and her family has a house and a car in Shenzhen. Both parents are in business, so her family is rich.
Although Wang Guangwen's financial condition is not as good as his girlfriend's, his girlfriend doesn't hate him. After all, she likes Wang Guangwen because of his charm. And they have been together for three years, and my girlfriend values this relationship very much. Although her parents and relatives were dissatisfied with Wang Guangwen, the girl persisted because of her love. Now this relationship has finally blossomed. My girlfriend agreed to Wang Guangwen's proposal, and Wang Guangwen and his girlfriend began to prepare for their wedding with the consent of their parents.
For Wang Guangwen, the process of talking about marriage is really a bit bumpy. After all, his girlfriend's family is so rich that the bride price is 300 thousand. Later, the two families talked several times. His girlfriend's parents, considering the conditions of Wang Guangwen's family, set the bride price at180,000 for their daughter's happiness.
Regarding the wedding room, the girlfriend's family said that if the young couple settled in Shenzhen, the house would be paid down by their family. If it is in the man's house, they will use the money as their daughter's dowry. No matter where they are, there will be 100 thousand yuan after the wedding. Both families recognized this condition, so they quickly set a wedding date, and now everything is going smoothly as planned.
Just a few days ago, Wang Guangwen and his girlfriend went to choose a wedding dress, take a wedding photo, set up a wedding company and made an electronic invitation. They discussed that it was time to announce the wedding news. Wang Guangwen brought his girlfriend into his family group for convenience. He asked his girlfriend to pull him into her family, and so did her. But it is in sending electronic invitations that the two conflict.
Girlfriends think that both parties have just entered each other's family group, and at least they can send a red envelope to explain that it is one thing to announce the wedding news. It's a bit hasty to announce the wedding news as soon as you join the group. After all, there are elders in the family group. Out of courtesy, you should send a red envelope to get to know each other's relatives first, so that you can deal with each other better in the future. Although this method is rigid after all, the elders like it very much and it is easy to win the favor of the elders.
But Wang Guangwen doesn't think so. He didn't think it was necessary. He immediately said to his girlfriend, "I'll inform my relatives over there, so there's no need for red packets."
Girlfriend said, "This won't do. There are at least 50 members in my family, and they are all elders. How can I send four or five hundred dollars as a courtesy? "
Wang Guangwen was very unhappy when he heard this, because he felt that the wedding news was announced to invite relatives to the wedding. It was originally a gift, but now that the gift has not been received, it is necessary to send hundreds of dollars, which is not the case at all. But because of his girlfriend's insistence, Wang Guangwen did it reluctantly.
He thought for a long time, how to complete the task without losing money, so he thought of a way to be a chicken thief. It happens that tomorrow is Monday, a working day. At nine o'clock, he silently sent a red envelope of 300 yuan in the group, deliberately setting the number as one person. The red envelope was sent out, and he took it back at the first time, so he went back and forth three times. Of course, the money finally fell into Wang Guangwen's wallet.
At noon, the woman's relatives and friends saw a red envelope in the family group and took a look. Everyone was robbed, and the red envelopes were all given out. They want to know who is so lucky. When they click to enter, they see that the best luck for each red envelope is Wang Guangwen. When relatives saw this, their homes were blown up. Originally, they had no good impression of Wang Guangwen. Now he is too stingy to be a man.
I robbed the red envelope myself, too. Forget it, more than once, three times in a row. It's really speechless. Through this incident, many elderly people feel that Wang Guangwen's character is worrying. They have been chatting in the group, and the woman's parents and girlfriend saw it and were very angry. My girlfriend immediately went to find her boyfriend, but when she saw Wang Guangwen's triumphant face, her girlfriend was furious instantly.
When Wang Guangwen saw his girlfriend coming, he immediately went to "take credit" and said politely, "Look, am I smart? I sent three red envelopes from 300 yuan, a total of 900 yuan. I not only fulfilled your instructions, but also exceeded the standard. Does it make you particularly face? "
The girlfriend said angrily, "Is this a red envelope?"
Wang Guangwen also said confidently, "If you ask me to send it, I will do it. Can't I grab my own red envelope? " ? Besides, there is no rule that I can't grab the red envelope myself. Grab the red envelope is originally by hand speed and luck. This is their hand speed and bad luck. Can you blame me? "
His girlfriend was shocked by his loyalty and said, "I can't say you're okay." You are the smartest person in the world, and everyone is a fool. I really admire you! " I'm not getting married! "
Wang Guangwen was dumbfounded this time. Afterwards, he found that his girlfriend was really angry. He refused to go to her house many times, and the phone and WeChat were hacked. He doesn't want to wait for his girlfriend downstairs. When he finally arrived, he immediately took his girlfriend's hand and said, "Wen Wen, even if I made a mistake, we still have to get married." You see, the invitations have been sent out and the hotels have been booked, so you won't marry. "
I don't know whether Wang Guangwen's low emotional intelligence angered his girlfriend or whether the red envelope made his girlfriend hold a grudge all the time. She struggled to shake off Wang Guangwen's hand, gave him a push and said, "Don't marry a fart. Go and get married yourself. I would rather be single all my life than marry you! " Then she left without looking back.
My girlfriend's parents liked what her daughter did, so they threw the bank card to Wang Guangwen and said, "I'll give you a lot of bride price. Let's cancel the wedding. We will take care of the rest. Go home. My daughter can't marry you. "
Wang Guangwen flew away with his bank card, but he still didn't understand. It's a mixed blessing. It's too sudden. He explained to his friend that the reason for canceling the wedding date was this: "My girlfriend won't marry me because of a broken red envelope. I really don't understand why their family is so fake, but also use red envelopes as a favor. They also call me stingy and have low emotional intelligence. Originally, giving red envelopes in the group was an active atmosphere. It's my fault that I didn't catch them. I think they are too narrow-minded to play. "
In fact, to be honest, Rainbow Wenguang is really speechless. Many people fell out because of the bride price, but he fell out at home because of giving red envelopes. In fact, it is really speechless to rob yourself spontaneously for such things as red envelopes in the group. In fact, the essence of red envelopes is to make everyone feel happy and let everyone get your heart. Rainbow Wenguang's action had better not be carried out. Is to hit a girl in the face in front of relatives. If people really marry you, they are really blind.
In fact, there are many rules in life, such as the bride price and dowry when talking about marriage, which is human nature. Of course, the same is true of giving red envelopes in the community. This is not the gain or loss of one's own interests at all, but a kind of etiquette culture. When you don't want to do this and want to break the rules but can't bear the consequences, you'd better think twice.
Many things have two sides, good and bad. In the face of this matter, you don't have to compromise yourself or go with the flow. It is wise to know the world but not the world.
Each of us accepts love in different ways. Maybe you like flowers and gifts, maybe I like red envelopes, maybe she just feels love through sweet words. There are many ways to express love, and there are many ways to accept it. Don't test your love just by listening to a word or two from others.