What occasion do you need to give gifts? Q: Last week, a promoted colleague invited us to his home. I went there happily. When I arrived at his home, I was embarrassed to find that many invited colleagues had brought gifts. I want to know, what kind of occasions should I give gifts, and under what circumstances should I not give gifts? Peggy: Actually, you don't have to be embarrassed. In this case, there is nothing wrong with sending gifts or not. Generally speaking, if you accept an invitation to someone's home for dinner or a party, you should bring some small gifts, such as a bunch of flowers or a basket of fruit. If the other party invites you to be a guest because of promotion, housewarming and other reasons, it is good to bring your blessing. If a friend invites you to a wedding and birthday celebration, you should give a gift in advance even if it is too late to congratulate you, because these two occasions are more formal and important. In western etiquette, it is not necessary to give gifts to attend the engagement ceremony, graduation ceremony and the second wedding of the host, but it is necessary to give gifts to attend the baby's baptism ceremony. No matter which country and any occasion you attend a party, you can't go wrong as long as you pay attention to the different meanings represented by flowers. My brother doesn't want to share the gift money with me. Q: Mom has a birthday every year, and we both chip in to buy her a present. This year, my mother's birthday is coming. When I proposed "raising funds" to send my mother to travel abroad, he firmly opposed it on the grounds that it was too expensive. To this end, we are at loggerheads. How can I reconcile this contradiction? Peggy: Let your brother think about what gift you should give your mother. If the gift he suggested is also what your mother needs and wants, then you should take a step back and take your brother's advice. Maybe he is short of money recently, so he can't spend too much money to "subsidize" his mother's trip, and he doesn't want to make it clear to you. You'd better think more about him. It's best not to send gifts to your mother separately from your younger brother, which will make your younger brother lose face. Moreover, once mom realizes the contradiction between you, she will feel guilty for bringing you trouble and burden. Rules for keeping pets Q: My family just moved into an upscale community. My husband gave me a puppy to ease my loneliness. Sometimes dogs don't listen, they pee or run around. Some unfamiliar neighbors will glare at me. In order not to be rude, I want to ask some rules about keeping pets. Peggy: 1. When taking a pet for a walk, remember to bring a plastic bag and clean up the feces left by the pet on the road in time; 2. When greeting neighbors, order pets to sit where they are, and don't yell or run around, so as not to scare children; 3. Don't bring your pet to your neighbor's house, which is impolite; 4. When neighbors come to your house as guests, you should remind them that you have pets at home, because some people are allergic to pet hair; As long as you take your pet out, no matter how close it is, you should lead it with a chain, because you can never guarantee that it will not run away. Spam is really annoying. Q: I have a very good college male classmate. He often contacts me by email and sends me some interesting emails. But the horrible emails and boring jokes he sent me recently made me very disgusted. I want to tell him that I don't want to see these disgusting things again. I'm afraid he will misunderstand me and I don't want to contact him again. How can I solve this problem? Peggy: When dealing with such a problem, most people will quietly delete the spam instead of directly rejecting the sender. If you really can't "turn a blind eye", you can also tell him by email that you appreciate his busy schedule to write to you, but you really don't care to read every letter carefully, and it will be deleted as spam after a long time. You hope he can send some meaningful letters. I believe he will send you emails selectively in the future. How to make up for leaking business secrets? Q: The boss told me privately that the company is conducting business activities in secret. I revealed it to a good colleague and warned her to keep it a secret. I didn't expect that almost the whole company is spreading this story now, which makes me fidget every day, for fear that the boss will pursue this matter with me. How can I make up for my mistake? Peggy: First of all, we should minimize the impact. Start with your best colleague and ask questions one by one to find the last link in this "rumor chain". Please keep this colleague a secret, and don't pass this "secret" on to others, otherwise any influence in the future will only be borne by her/him. Take the initiative to admit mistakes to the boss. Whether he already knows about it or not, you should let him know the current situation from you. Your honesty will be forgiven by your boss, but you can't make such a mistake again.