Eleven,

Four bachelors eat hot pot together. I swear: "I will leave you next year!" " "This year's double eleven is coming, and now I am alone.

When squatting in the pit, I heard the girl next door blowing. In the spirit of jokes, I asked: Hey, is it too hot? Who knows, she replied, "Well, I can feed you when it's cold." How is this broken?

3. Girls openly voted for the class flower, and Xiaomei, who looks plain, made a speech: If I am elected, in a few years, all the sisters here can show off to their husbands that I was much more beautiful than the class flower when I was in college. As a result, she became a class flower.

4. Woman: Husband, which part of my body do you like best? Man: Chin! W: What if I choose two? Man: Chin, your double chin really fascinates me!

5. "Say something heavy, such as your weight!" After a moment's silence, my sister replied, "This is too heavy. Say something superficial, such as your IQ!" " "

6. "Do beautiful women need to charge the phone bill? give

90 charge 100. ""No."

80 charge 100? ""no ""why? " "I don't want to give you my mobile phone number. "

Seven. One day, a villager chatted with the village head and said; "Village head, they all say you can't read numbers. Is it true? " The village chief was anxious and stretched himself.

Three fingers, said a sentence "send you.

Five words, nonsense. "

Today, when Xiao Ming came home, he bowed his head and said to his father: The teacher said that I am fish begins to stink at the head, like father, like son. Xiao Ming's father slapped him and scolded: Did you lift the skirt of a female classmate?

After Xiao Ming graduated, he found a job in sales. One day, he called: "Excuse me, are you Mr. Wang from Zhong Wang?" The other end of the phone replied, "Yes, but my husband is definitely not a ham sausage!" " "10. Waiting for oral surgery in the hospital. The nurse came and asked the doctor, "Is the anesthetic in the mouth or outside the mouth?" The doctor said, "on your leg, don't run away for a while!" " "

The male god is top student. I wrote him a confession letter yesterday, and the result was a serious mental shock. A few * * *

Ten words, actually circled.

A dozen typos. What is this? What about batch work?

Twelve. "What do you think of plastic surgery?" "Artificial beauty may not be as beautiful as natural beauty, but if there is no accident, artificial beauty must be better than natural ugliness."

Thirteen. If you do more work than others every day, but you are happy and feel valued, then your leader is more capable and talented than you.

14. Two mountain friends go climbing together. One of them accidentally fell into the valley ... the other shouted, "Are you hurt?" I only heard the echo from the abyss: "I don't know, I'm still falling ..."

15. Travel to Japan. When I left, my friend saw me off at the airport, gave me a USB flash drive and said, well, don't forget to bring some local products when you come back! (well, is there a relationship between local products and USB flash drives? )

16. Dad started playing WeChat, so I pretended to be a stranger and added him, trying to fool Dad. Today, he began to tell me that his son failed to live up to expectations. Hey, talking too much is all tears!

Seventeen.

That year I made a divination, saying that I

At the age of 30, you will become a rich man. In order to prove him wrong, I sleep and eat every day until today.

On my 30th birthday, there was a word "demolition" on the wall, and I found that my destiny could not be violated!

Eighteen. When I was studying at night, I suddenly heard the seniors in our class say, "I have finished such a difficult physics paper, and I want to make a chemistry paper to reward myself."

19. I asked my friend: If you need to pay the single tax one day, will you find a girlfriend quickly? My friend solemnly said: I choose to pay taxes and spend more money to find a girlfriend! (doomed to die alone)

two

10. Being a bachelor is very intolerant. In fact, being single is also very exciting. Single people always love silence, just because of mistakes, there is nowhere to express their feelings. Until I met you now, my silent heart was excited again.

Twenty one. marry

Three years later, the wife asked her husband, "I look at you now, as if I don't have that kind of heart-warming feeling." Do you still have it for me? " The husband said, "I always jump." And it is not a simple heartbeat, it is a pleasure. "