How to deal with boys’ puberty?

After entering the pubertal development period, a boy’s body and psychology will undergo obvious changes as he grows older. This period is the most important period for adolescents’ sexual and psychological growth. Parents should educate them correctly. . Below is the method I shared for dealing with boys’ puberty. Let’s take a look.

Methods for treating the pubertal development period of boys

Generally speaking, puberty is from the ages of 11 or 2 to 17 or 8 years old, and from 17 or 8 years old to 24 or 24 years old. Five years old is late adolescence.

Broadly speaking, both adolescence and late adolescence can be called adolescence. Not only do male adolescents' bodies develop rapidly during adolescence, their reproductive systems gradually mature, and they develop a male body shape with secondary sexual characteristics such as a low pitch, a protruding throat, long beards, and pubic hair; many psychological diseases related to sexual development also occur during this period. Occurrence, parents should pay special attention to the following issues during boys' adolescence:

1. Sexual obscurity, nocturnal emissions, and masturbation

Males generally begin to experience nocturnal emissions around the age of 15. This is because they enter puberty. Later, the testicles gradually mature and produce sperm. The sperm is excreted from the urethra along with the semen slurry secreted by the seminal vesicles, prostate and other accessory glands, and nocturnal emissions occur.

According to statistics, about 80% of unmarried young people have nocturnal emissions. Generally, it is normal to have nocturnal emissions once a week. However, if there are several nocturnal emissions within a week or semen leaks out whenever there is sexual impulse, it is a pathological condition. As for the folklore that one drop of semen and one drop of blood, there is no scientific reason why nocturnal emissions will seriously damage one's vitality.

Some teenagers stimulate their sexual organs with their hands or other instruments to cause penile erection and ejaculation to achieve sexual satisfaction. This is called masturbation. Modern physiological psychologists do not hold a completely negative attitude towards masturbation, but believe that masturbation is a manifestation of normal sexual and physiological development. But frequent masturbation can also make people feel dazed, tired, and listless.

The cause of frequent nocturnal emissions or masturbation is external stimulation of the penis, such as the accumulation of smegma and inflammation of the glans penis caused by excessive foreskin. But the most important factor is that obscene books, periodicals and pornographic videos are everywhere in today's society. The sexual nerves of teenagers are in a state of excitement for a long time after watching them. The spinal nerves receive sexual signals too frequently and are overburdened, which can lead to frequent nocturnal emissions or spermatorrhea. Nocturnal emissions and masturbation are twin brothers. Ejaculation can produce pleasure and trigger masturbation, while excessive masturbation can trigger frequent nocturnal emissions.

To avoid frequent nocturnal emissions, controlling masturbation habits is key. From the perspective of teenagers themselves, they must make up their minds to get rid of the bad habit of frequent masturbation. They should focus on their studies, participate in more cultural and sports activities, do not sleep in, the quilt should not be too thick, and the underwear should not be too tight, so that the sexual center is in an appropriate state. A state of inhibition, especially not reading pornographic books, periodicals and videos to avoid indulging in them.

Also pay attention to vulva hygiene. Those with excessive foreskin can undergo circumcision. As parents, we must provide sex education to our children in a timely and appropriate manner, enhance their understanding of sexual knowledge, break the "mystery" of sex, and allow them to safely come out of their sexual ambiguity.

2. Children should be taught to refuse nude paintings

Nowadays, in many boys’ rooms and dormitories, there are large and very sexy portraits of human bodies with bare chests and arms. A survey on juvenile sex crimes shows that 42% of juveniles who commit sex crimes started by collecting and viewing paintings or pictures.

Relevant experts pointed out that boys and girls are in the development stage of secondary sexual characteristics, quietly emitting a vague sexual consciousness, and generating imagination and desire for sex. Entering the stage of sexual desire, at this time some of them will "hungryly" collect "sexual information". As one of the carriers of sexual information, nude paintings undoubtedly played a role in promoting them to enter the "forbidden zone" and become sexual experiencers prematurely.

From a physiological point of view, sexual desire is human instinct. Sexy portraits can give teenagers a certain degree of psychological satisfaction, trigger sexual thoughts and stimulate sexual impulses, and can also induce excessive masturbation and obscenity. However, because the psychology of teenagers has not yet fully matured, the ability to balance excitement and inhibition of the nervous system is still quite fragile. Strong desires are stimulated prematurely, which can induce insomnia, dreaminess, listlessness, neurasthenia and other diseases, which is detrimental to physical and mental health and also has a negative impact on learning. , work and life have adverse effects.

3. Prevent gender errors caused by yin and yang inversion.

To determine the gender of a baby after birth, it is mainly to examine its reproductive organs. But there is a type of male perineal hypospadias, in which the urethra opens in the perineum in front of the anus, and the scrotum is separated to both sides, just like the female labia majora, and the penis is smaller and shrank between the scrotum. If examined carefully, both testicles can be palpated in the scrotum.

However, some parents often mistakenly determine the gender of their babies as female due to negligence. For example, a student who was about to graduate from junior high school went to the hospital for diagnosis and treatment because he discovered that he had the wrong gender. After undergoing hypospadias plasty surgery, he changed his original "female" to male.

What deserves more attention is that most of today’s children are only children. Some parents like boys and some like girls. When a boy is born, he is given a girl’s name and dressed up as a girl. , let him play with girls. Over time, the child will subtly regard himself as a woman and lose the masculinity of a boy when he becomes an adult.

This kind of physiological misunderstanding and psychological misunderstanding must be corrected in time in the early stages of youth development, otherwise it will directly hinder the healthy physical and mental development of the child.

4. The psychological pressure caused by cryptorchidism

Under normal circumstances, the testicles of children have descended into the scrotum during the newborn period. If they fail to descend into the scrotum, they will remain In the groin or abdominal cavity, it is called cryptorchidism. This disease accounts for approximately 0.2% of adults. With cryptorchidism, due to the influence of cryptorchidism by higher temperatures in the body, after puberty, the seminiferous epithelium of cryptorchidism atrophies and cannot produce sperm; most patients with cryptorchidism on both sides are infertile due to lack of sperm.

In addition, cryptorchidism is located in the groin, which can easily cause crushing injuries. Long-term exposure of cryptorchidism to heat can also lead to malignant transformation. According to statistics, the incidence of testicular tumors in patients with cryptorchidism is higher than 20-48 times higher than ordinary people.

Children with cryptorchidism play with children and find that they lack small balls, which will leave regrets in their hearts. If they are laughed at by their peers again, the psychological damage will be aggravated. I don't want to confide in my parents. If the parents are more careless, their children will be seriously damaged physically and mentally when they grow up.

If cryptorchidism is discovered in time, orchidopexy can be performed when the child is 9-11 years old to fix the testicles in the scrotum. About 80% of patients can gain fertility. Without surgical treatment, only 10% are fertile. Therefore, after entering puberty, if you find that the testicles have not descended into the scrotum, you should seek medical diagnosis and treatment as soon as possible.

Suggestions on sex education for boys during puberty

Father is the best teacher for sex education for boys

Many middle-aged men will recall that when they were young, they often Faced with sexual problems, I ended up carrying a heavy mental burden for a long time and was out of breath. This was a very common phenomenon in the historical context of sexual restriction at that time. In order to help their sons become men smoothly and avoid repeating the tragedies of history, they are happy to start with family sex education so that children can obtain scientific, timely, moderate and appropriate sexual knowledge at all stages of development. This starting point is undoubtedly a good one, but practice is not as easy as imagined. So, following some basic principles will help you as a father.

First of all, the most important prerequisite is to handle the relationship between father and son. Good sex education needs to establish a relationship of love and respect between father and son.

If a "father" always leaves a rough, cold, stern, and impatient impression on his children, and they are displeased with them, the children will be like a mouse seeing a cat when they see their father, and they will try to stay away as far away as possible. , how can father and son open up and talk about issues equally?

Secondly, fathers must play and talk with their children more often, listen to their children's voices, acknowledge their children's hobbies and feelings, and Share your children's interests, joys, and even hobbies, and support their hobbies with respect.

Some men mistakenly believe that since they want to cultivate bravery and decisiveness in boys, they cannot be too close to them. In fact, boys and girls also need physical closeness, especially closeness from their father. This kind of tender touch will help them develop a sense of security, allowing them to understand that emotional connections should be established between people and learn how to love others. Physical intimacy is the basic means to reflect and convey love and support.

Again, don’t think that sex education is about sexual skills. Children generally don’t wake up one morning and suddenly ask a lot of sexual questions.

They will ask all kinds of sex-related questions at any time as they grow up. Their problems emerged gradually. Children’s sex education must be done in a camera-based manner. Of course, the earlier the better and the more truthful the better.

Finally, it is worth pointing out that the education of love and the cultivation of father-son affection take time. No matter how busy you are, you must find time to accompany your son. Education lacking father's love is incomplete education.

Carrying out sex education is easier said than done. The only way is to communicate with children on an equal footing, express your own opinions without imposing them on them, and convince others with reason, that is, not use force to pressure others. , Only in this way can it be possible to handle the relationship between father and son and do a good job in family sex education.

Some boys are often reluctant to take a bath with their father when they enter adolescence. If the child refuses to take a bath with his father, it means that he has entered late adolescence and his body has begun to mature. There were some normal phenomena, such as nocturnal emissions, but he didn't understand what was going on. On the contrary, he thought he had done something "bad" and was afraid that his parents would know. At this time, fathers should pay attention: First of all, do not scold, lose your temper, or criticize your children because you refuse to take a bath with them. You should congratulate your son on his development and maturity. If you choose an inappropriate attitude, your child will develop fears and feelings of guilt about sex. Second, you naturally and generously taught your son some sexual knowledge and told him how to correctly face the coming physiological changes. We believe that in sex education, fathers should be their sons’ best teachers.

How mothers should provide sex education to boys

Suggestion 1: Help boys establish a correct view of gender

Although a person’s gender is determined at the moment of fertilization , but on a psychological level, the psychological development of gender is from the age of 3 to adulthood, reaching its peak in adolescence.

Children around 3 years old will clearly know whether they are a boy or a girl, but they will also curiously ask why girls wear skirts with long hair and play pretend to be drinking wine, while boys wear Wearing pants, keeping short hair, and playing horse riding and fighting games are the beginning of children's gender psychological development. At this stage, mothers should pay attention to two major principles. One is to let the boy know how to protect his body, and the other is to let the boy have a positive image of various parts of the body.

Research shows that as an only child, a boy has been favored by his parents and elders since he was a child. He rarely does outdoor sports. He likes to watch cartoons and play on the computer at home. He is used to jumping and illogical thinking and does not understand feelings. People and things around you can easily become selfish and indifferent. When some boys reach the age of marriage, their minds are still like those of children. They have no awareness of "shoulders" and cannot bear the heavy burden. Therefore, mothers should cultivate boys’ gender awareness as early as possible.

Suggestion 2: Teach boys about sex naturally

Mothers do not have to be as serious and orthodox as teachers teaching students to teach boys about their bodies. There are many natural ways in life. For example, when giving a boy a bath, you can tell him the name and function of each part of the body, turning bathing into an interesting game. When you need to change clothes in a public place, tell him not to change in public, but to find a sheltered place, because some parts of the body are private. This naturally allows boys to understand their gender and recognize the differences between men and women.

Regarding the sexual issues raised by the child, the mother should try to tell him in simple language that these are natural things, so that the child can have a correct scientific understanding of the body. Mom will mention words such as "breasts" and "penis" generously, just as naturally as telling him this is an apple and that is a banana. Of course, children must be told at the same time that some parts of the human body are private and cannot be exposed, otherwise they will be embarrassed.

Mothers must first correct their own thoughts so that they can give correct guidance to boys. In fact, boys' questions about sex are as simple as "what to eat tonight". The mother only needs a very intuitive answer. Too many and too in-depth answers will confuse the boy's thinking.

Recommendation 3: Provide sexual moral education to boys

Early sexual education is related to whether boys can grow up healthily physically and mentally, and is also related to the stability of family and society. Sex education includes sexual physiology, psychology, morality, ethics and many other aspects, of which sexual morality is a very important part.

Sexual morality is the sum of social norms that regulate human sexual behavior between the sexes. It can maintain the stability of social order and ensure the normal conduct of social life. The content of sexual morality can usually be summarized as: sexual moral norms; correct views on love, chastity and fertility. At its core is love and respect.

Mothers should educate boys to respect their own privacy and that of others. The concept of privacy should be instilled in boys from the beginning of sex education. The mother should tell the boy that the genitals are a private part of the human body and no one else has the right to see or touch this part without permission.

Mothers should send positive messages to boys through non-verbal behaviors, such as mutual respect and loyalty between husband and wife, mutual responsibility for housework, respecting the elderly and caring for the young, helping others, being civilized and polite, and being responsible for work. The principles of being serious, responsible, honest and trustworthy are the best education for children.