September 2004 1
As long as the heart is still beating, there will be a tide of blood. Three years later, I finally returned to class. Very good!
Memories are undoubtedly dancing on a sharp knife for me. Three years ago, when I was admitted to a key high school in Shenzhen with a high score of 700 points in the senior high school entrance examination, fate played a big joke on me. A sudden car accident took away my dear brother, and I myself was in a coma for half a month in the arms of death.
When I woke up, my body was full of tubes, my throat was cut and my head was drilled out. I can't move or talk. Looking at my thin mother beside me, I burst into tears. ...
When I woke up again, my consciousness woke up vaguely. I think of my brother. My mother smiled with tears and said, "My brother has gone back to his hometown." I am fascinated by Deng Deng, and my intelligence is no different from that of a three-year-old child. My head is blank and I can't remember anything. I can't believe I believed my mother.
A year later, I regained some memories and asked my mother the same question. My mother still said, "My brother has gone back to his hometown." Let me not miss it. However, I saw that her expression was getting more and more wrong, so I solemnly said to my mother, "Is there anything wrong? You have been hiding from me, I can bear it! " My mother's tears suddenly burst like a flood. My mother told me that my brother left us forever in the car accident with me a year ago. What do you mean "forever"? I cried too. I can't believe my ears, and I don't want to believe it. I looked at my mother in despair, hoping that she would change her mind, but my mother nodded with tears. My head is as blank as a bolt from the blue. Then, I fell on the bed like a madman, and the wound on my head was not completely healed. All this was knocked down by me, and blood poured out at once. Mom and dad jumped up in fear and hugged me. I heard my mother crying, "Son, I can't live without you anymore …" My eyes were blurred, not tears, but yes.
September 2004 10
Now that I know the truth, I feel that everything doesn't matter. I am a sinner and a cripple. I like being alone. The quietest lake in the hospital is where I go. Whenever I sit alone by the lake, I think about some life and death issues. I have seen through life and death after surviving a car accident. I don't think death is terrible. It is a process that everyone must go through. Life in this world is accidental, and death is inevitable.
Looking at the lonely ups and downs of the red sun, I will burst into tears unconsciously. I don't understand why it keeps going up and down, and keeps going up and down. Occasionally, people who lack arms and legs quietly walk by the lake in wheelchairs, or a psychopath gives me a blank and bright smile. "Unfortunately, what supports you to walk in this bustling world?"
Sitting by the lake, staring at the lake alone in a daze, Richie Jen's "Brothers" will inadvertently ring in my heart. If my brother is not on my motorcycle, he won't ... I can't forgive myself because I killed my brother. God, please give me a reason to live, okay? I thought about life and death again.
Once, I came to the lake in a wheelchair and found a figure following me behind me. I know that's my mother. When my eyes met her, she ran away in a panic. My mother has been like this for many mornings or evenings. Wherever I go, her eyes are concerned. I know she's not worried about me. She often stays in the ward, still looking at the lake. Once, my mother came to the lake to find me with a copy of How Steel was Tempered. I tore it into four pieces in front of my mother and threw it into the mud.
"If you don't cheer up, what will we do in the future!" I dare not look at my mother's face of pain, regret and forbearance. When I think of my mother, my inner hardness seems to melt little by little.
September 2004 18
Two years later, I finally got out of the hospital, but I still couldn't face the terrible scars on my forehead and neck, and I couldn't face the invisible scars inside. The wound there is far from healing, and I feel desperate at the slightest touch. I wonder if it will scab. I completely lost confidence in myself. I either lock myself in my room all day, go clubbing or go to the seaside alone. At first, my mother followed me all the time, and finally, my father persuaded me not to follow me. It's just that every time I go out, she always says, "It's okay to go out for a walk!" " "Until today, I gradually understand that my mother's words are actually self-consolation, a secret prayer, a reminder to me, a plea and an accusation. I don't know how upset she was during those hours when I was away from home.
In those boring days, some people and things touched me deeply and shallowly.
I don't remember the nth time I came to a disco. I found a window seat and sat down. It's still noisy sound and shaking figure, but in the explosive music, I can lose myself and let go of all my troubles. Suddenly, a silly dragonfly flew out of the window and bumped into the glass motionless. "Is it dead?" My heart moved. "It's good to be busy all day, lifeless, carefree and happy!" "I was thinking that the' dead' dragonfly moved again, and I could see that it was trying to turn its injured head." Why is this? "I sighed, and soon, unexpectedly, it flapped its wings and flew again. At that moment, I suddenly felt heartache and tears. Insects still have the instinct to survive. Why should I commit suicide? It was midnight when I got home that day. Passing by my parents' room, I heard my mother crying: "You know how hard I tried to save him. I don't want anything to happen to him. What should I do if ...? ""it's okay, it must be okay. He just needs to be quiet now. He will be fine after a while. " This is my father's efforts to comfort my mother, but also my father's self-comfort. The dialogue between parents is like Alibaba's mysterious spell-open sesame! All the dusty memories were suddenly opened, and everything my parents paid for me was like strange jewels shining in the grottoes of memory. I broke into the house and cried with my parents in my arms: "Mom and Dad, I'm going to school! Will you buy me a copy of How Steel was Tempered tomorrow? " Mother silently took out a shabby book from the bedside cupboard-"How Steel was Tempered". "This book, this book is not ..." I was too excited to speak. I held my mother's book and obviously felt its weight.
September 25(th), 2004
The bell rang and the Chinese teacher was telling the story of Shi Tiesheng emotionally. Shi Tiesheng suddenly lost his legs at the most arrogant age, so he hid in the Ditan, just because he had another world, he could escape from it. How many years later, he realized for the first time that the deserted garden not only has its own ruts everywhere, but also has its mother's footprints where there are ruts; For the first time, he understood that all the sufferings of his son were doubled by his mother. Unfortunately, by the time he realized it, the mother and son had been separated forever. I'm glad I didn't wake up too late; I am glad that I finally found a reason to live; I'm glad that I finally understand what supports those people who lack arms and legs to walk in this bustling world. Although, I mustered up 100% courage, made unimaginable efforts, and took the senior high school entrance examination again, with unsatisfactory results; Although the school I am attending now is just an ordinary technical school, I still have to cheer for myself. I believe that after five years, I will rely on my own skills to stand on the society and be a self-reliant and useful person to society and family.
Sitting in the spacious and bright classroom again, my mood is sunny. I finally blocked the throat of fate and walked out of the bottom of my life. Although I am still an insignificant drop of water in the vast sea of people, I know that it has its own color and taste, and one day it will flow through the sad ferry, merge into the rough sea and surge in the waves.
Thanks to the sudden disaster, it broke all my dreams and taught me to respect and love life; Thanks to my parents, they gave me all the love and taught me to surpass myself and taste life. ...
Yang Lin, majoring in electronic commerce, Department of Information Technology, Shenzhen Senior Technical School, Grade 04.
(Instructor: Liu Keqin)
Source: Shenzhen Senior Technical School (
/)
May 2005 19 2 1:23 Shenzhen Evening News
The diary "Hardness of Life" written by Yang Lin, a student of Shenzhen Senior Technical School, beat nearly 40,000 contestants from more than 3,000 schools across the country and won the first prize in the senior high school group of the national "Love Education-China Children's Emotional Diary" essay competition; The diary truly records the story of his amnesia in a car accident, and his unimaginable efforts in three years to re-take the senior high school entrance examination and get out of the trough of his life-
Shenzhen boy's life is as hard as Paul Kochakin's.
"Thanks to the sudden disaster, it broke all my dreams and taught me to fear and love life; Thanks to my parents who never give up, they taught me to surpass myself and taste life while giving me all their love ... "No melodramatic language, no juvenile maturity. The Diary of Yang Lin, a 2004 student majoring in e-commerce in Shenzhen Senior Technical School, The Hardship of Life made many experts and judges cry. Defeated nearly 40,000 contestants from more than 3,000 schools across the country, and won the first prize in the high school group of the national essay competition "Love Education-China Children's Emotional Diary".
This competition is jointly sponsored by the National Youth Working Committee and the China Education Association. Gu Mingyuan, a famous educator and president of the China Education Association, commented on the article: "This is a China children's version of How Steel was Tempered."
A car accident made him lose his memory.
Yang Lin, a native of Yongzhou, Hunan Province, came to Shenzhen with his father at the age of 7. Yang Lin's father is a bus driver and his mother works in a clothing factory. Four years ago, Yang Lin was admitted to Shenzhen Middle School with an excellent score of 700 in the senior high school entrance examination. Yang Lin told reporters that his biggest dream is to be admitted to Tsinghua or Peking University. However, fate played a big joke on this clever and diligent child. On April 7th, 200 1 year, a sudden car accident took Yang Lin's dear brother and left him in a coma for half a month in the arms of death.
When she was pushed out of the intensive care unit, Yang Lin was full of tubes, her throat was cut, a hole was drilled in her head, and her skull had a large depression, only one pair of eyes could move. The brain injury made Yang Lin lose all his memories. He doesn't even know his father and mother. Just the day before the accident of the Yang Lin brothers, Yang Lin's father had just been admitted to Donghu Hospital because of severe hepatitis. Family mutation made Yang Lin's mother almost collapse.
Yang Lin, who lost his memory, became very depressed. "In order to take care of him, I slapped him a lot." Yang Lin's mother told reporters. Because Yang Lin's trachea was cut off, he couldn't eat with his mouth. She cooks all kinds of broth for him with rice every day, then squeezes out the broth with gauze and feeds it to him one by one from a catheter inserted in Yang Lin's nose. When feeding Yang Lin for the first time, Yang Lin, who couldn't speak, reached out and gave her mother two irritable slaps because of her physical discomfort. Yang Lin's mother told reporters with tears: "I don't blame him. At that time, he hit everyone and he didn't recognize anyone. "
A sense of guilt made him despair.
Four months after the operation, Yang Lin's consciousness vaguely woke up. He recognized his parents and remembered his younger brother. "Where is my brother?" Yang Lin's mother, with red eyes, reluctantly smiled and said, "Brother has gone back to his hometown." A year later, he regained some memories and asked his mother the same question. Under Yang Lin's repeated questioning, his mother told him that his brother had left forever in the car accident a year ago. What do you mean "forever"? Yang Lin burst into tears at once, and then fell on the bed like a madman: "I killed my brother!" " "
Yang Lin has been deeply guilty since he learned of his brother's death. "If my brother hadn't taken my motorcycle, he wouldn't have ..." Yang Lin was desperate because of his severe brain injury and the pain of losing his loved ones. Yang Lin told reporters that at that time, he liked to be alone most, and he often sat alone by the lake in the hospital for an afternoon. Every time Yang Lin goes to the lake, there is a painful and forbearing face behind him. How many mornings or evenings, in this way, where the son goes, the mother's sight will pay attention to where. Finally, one day, Yang Lin's mother couldn't help but find him by the lake with a copy of How Steel was Tempered. But in front of her mother, Yang Lin tore the book into four pieces and threw it on the ground. "I don't think everything is important. I am a cripple and a sinner. " Yang Lin said.
Birthdays will make him face himself.
Two years later, Yang Lin was finally discharged from the hospital. Severe amnesia and striking scars on his forehead and neck made Yang Lin completely lose confidence in himself. He either shuts himself in his room all day, goes to a disco or goes to the beach alone. "At first, my mother followed me all the time. Later, under the persuasion of my father, I finally stopped following me. I just said,' Go for a walk!' Until today, I gradually understand that my mother's words are actually self-comfort, a secret prayer, a reminder, a plea and an accusation. I don't know how upset she was during those hours when I was away from home. Yang Lin told reporters.
Besides the love of his parents, Yang Lin's classmates and friends also gave him a lot of warmth in life. Yang Lin, who suffers from amnesia, even forgot his birthday. One day after he was discharged from the hospital, his junior high school classmates invited him to a classmate's house to play. Unexpectedly, as soon as he entered the door, a dozen students sang birthday songs and held birthday cakes. Yang Lin said: "It is the love of my parents and the concern of my friends that gradually melts my inner hardness."
A "stupid" dragonfly made him realize life.
Yang Lin said that it was a "stupid" dragonfly in the disco that made him suddenly "epiphany". He said, "I can't remember how many times I have been to Dili." At this time, a silly dragonfly flew out of the window and crashed into the glass, motionless. Is it dead? My heart moved,' I am so happy! I was just thinking that the' dead' dragonfly moved again. Unexpectedly, in a short time, it actually flapped its wings and flew again. At that moment, I suddenly burst into tears of heartache. Insects still have the instinct to survive, so why should I? "
It was midnight when I got home that day. When I passed my parents' room, Yang Lin heard my mother crying: "You know how hard I worked to save him. I don't want anything to happen to him. What should I do if ...? "The father comforted his mother and said," It's all right, it must be all right. He just needs to be quiet now, and he will be fine after a while. " The dialogue between parents is like a key, which opens the floodgate of Yang Lin's memory. Yang Lin rushed into the door, hugged his parents and cried, "Mom and Dad, I'm going to school!" " "Mom silently took out a copy of How Steel was Tempered from the bedside cupboard, which was glued together with scotch tape." This book, this book is not torn by me ... "Yang Lin excitedly took the book and felt its weight.
A belief made him cheer for himself.
I want to study! In 2003, Yang Lin returned to Fuyong Middle School, where she had studied, and was in the third grade. Top students studying in Class A were forced to transfer to Class D. Nevertheless, Yang Lin still has a hard time studying. "There is no other way, I can only rely on the most mechanical way, while copying 10 times, not 20 times, or 30 times, until I remember it. 10, I have to recite it for two hours. "
Despite the unimaginable efforts made by ordinary people, Yang Lin's score in the senior high school entrance examination last year was not ideal, with only over 400 points. On the day of getting the grade, Yang Lin cried. Persuaded by his parents, he entered the e-commerce major of Shenzhen Senior Technical School. The teachers in the school take great care of Yang Lin and give special guidance according to his actual situation. Yang Lin said that if it weren't for the encouragement of Chinese teacher Liu Keqin, he wouldn't take part in the composition competition. "My memory is intermittent. Teacher Liu encouraged me to write as much as I wanted, and then pieced together a whole article. " "I never thought I would win the prize or the first prize. It was the help of the school and teachers that made me regain my confidence. " Yang Lin said.
"Although the school I am attending now is just an ordinary technical school, I still have to cheer for myself. I believe that after five years, I will rely on my own technology to stand on the society. I will become a self-reliant person who is useful to society and family. " Yang Lin told reporters
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