1. One day, my husband came back drunk in the middle of the night. His wife complained that he came back too late. He explained that he had just been entangled in the street by two salesmen. The wife asked, What are they selling you so late? The husband said: they sold me a knife and said to me, do you want money or die?

2.JC saw a drunk touching the side of the vat and turning around and saying, "What's the matter with you?" "It's okay! I go home, and the end of this wooden fence is my home. "

A jewelry store was stolen. When JC arrived at the scene, he found a drunk lying there. In order to find out the whereabouts of the jewels, JC found a bucket of cold water, put the drunk's head in the water and asked, "Did you see those jewels?" The drunk opened his misty eyes and said, "Sorry, I really can't find it. You'd better change a diver! " "

4. A matador was drinking in the country. His friends advised him not to drink too much, but in order to show his bluff, he staggered until he couldn't control himself. Then he took a shortcut to the stadium, where a bull was already lying. The matador immediately grabbed the horns and fought fiercely with them. Finally, the bull escaped. Afterwards, the matador said to his friends, "I really drank a little too much just now, or I had to drag the boy off the bike!" " ! "

A naval officer in the car stood beside the driver and didn't sit down to avoid damaging the neatly ironed uniform. A drunk got on the bus, walked up to the officer, pulled his sleeve and said he wanted to buy a ticket. The officer ignored him. But the drunk insisted, so the officer turned and said, "Friend, I'm not a conductor, I'm a naval officer." "Then," replied the drunk, "stop the boat. I want to take a bus. "

6. Bill was drunk again, stopped a taxi in Hart Square and said to the driver, "Take me to the Wall Hotel." The driver replied in surprise, "This is the Wall Hotel." "Really?" Bill asked again. "Yes, I won't lie to you." The driver answered affirmatively. So Bill took out a 10 yuan bill from his pocket and threw it to the driver, saying, "Great, this is yours, but don't drive so fast next time."

7. A person is drunk and walking on the road. He suddenly threw his head at a person and asked, "How many bags do I have on my head?" The man said, "Five." He said, "Aha, I still have four telephone poles from our house."

8. Husky came home drunk, pushed open the bedroom door and said to his wife, "I'm back, so start cursing me." Otherwise, you can't find the bed by touching the dark. "

9. One day, a drunk walked out of the Portman Hotel, got into a taxi and said to the driver, "Hilton Hotel, room 8 18 on the eighth floor." On the way, the driver found that the drunk took off all his clothes one by one and said, "Sir, it hasn't arrived in your room yet!" " The drunk was angry: "Why didn't you say so earlier?" "I just took off my shoes at the door!

10. Two friends got paid and decided to drink. One of them was a little worried: "My wife is very powerful and probably won't let me in." "I went home drunk, took off my clothes outside the door first, and then rang the doorbell. When my wife opened the door, I quickly threw my clothes into the house. She saw me naked and let me in at once. " The next day, two people met. "Hey, how did your wife treat you yesterday?" "Well, don't mention it!" I went to the door, took off my clothes and the door opened. I threw my clothes out, and then I heard a voice from the door: "Please pay attention and close the door at once. The next stop is People's Square. "