And this oath is also to warn the couple that you got married under such conditions, and you should continue to firmly implement this policy after marriage. Although it sounds a bit rigid to tell you these truths, if you can really do it, husband and wife will certainly get along in harmony.
In marriage, mutual loyalty and trust are the first conditions for the combination of husband and wife. They should trust and be loyal to each other, and should not cheat or hide anything from each other. If you can't even do the most basic honesty and trustworthiness, the relationship will certainly not last long. Some girls or boys use deception as a means to maintain a relationship in the process of communication, so I believe this relationship must be fragile and exist in a fictional scene.
Although when faced with a dilemma, people often give priority to the decision that is beneficial to them, no matter whether this decision violates human relations or not, whether it contains deception. When you can't face the problem rationally or honestly, the result is often one lie with another. A lie needs to be filled with a thousand lies, and there are more and more loopholes, and finally you get stuck in the mud.
And people who treat others sincerely, although they can't get away from it for a while, can always find someone who is worthy of being sincere and others. The second important condition is that husband and wife should respect each other. Here, not only personality, but also faith, each other's living habits and family are respected. This article reflects whether the three views of two people are consistent and whether they can understand and support each other on the road of marriage.
Ten years ago, on the bus to the university town in the outer suburbs, you could always see some advertisements about painless abortion and private parts plastic surgery. To put it bluntly, it is to give you an opportunity to face your mistakes again after the impulse.
But someone will definitely refute me. Love is free, and the concept of sex has long changed. Girls can be responsible for what they do. But what I want to say is that even in modern society, it is still a very good moral character to maintain self-love and keep one's integrity. What we reject is feudal conservative ideas and overly rigid attitudes, rather than deceiving and hiding our past, so that everyone will end up as an "honest man."
If you can't do what the other person asks you to do, then it shouldn't be difficult for you to be honest and find someone with the same idea.
Before the relationship between Xiao Yuan and A Liang began, A Liang had been pursuing the idea of being loyal to his heart, hoping that his future wife could finish what she started and fall in love just like herself on the premise of getting married. Xiao Yuan liked A Liang at first, just because he was a little old-fashioned, and he was much more mature than his impetuous peers.
But on the day they decided to have sex, A Liang suddenly asked Xiao Yuan a question, "Are you a virgin?" Xiao Yuan leng for a while. "Who cares about this now? You're not an ancient man who crossed over, are you? " After careful consideration, Xiao Yuan tried to put off the past with jokes. "I care, I hope my future wife is as honest as me, and I hope my future wife can marry me cleanly."
Xiao Yuan felt cold sweat because she had been with her boyfriend before, and she didn't pay much attention to this problem. Whether she is a virgin or not doesn't matter to her. But looking at A Liang's serious expression, she didn't want to lose this boyfriend, so she told a lie and said that she was as honest as A Liang and refused premarital sex.
Afraid that A Liang wouldn't believe it, she also showed A Liang her signature under the activity of "refusing premarital sex" initiated by Post Bar before. "No, I have signed and verified it." I didn't expect my behavior when I was bored to become evidence that I lied. A Liang saw the flashing light in his eyes, as if he had found the last original stone in the world, and turned around with Xiao Yuan excitedly. "We can find each other in the vast sea of people. I am the happiest person in the world now."
After a long time, Xiao Yuan forgot what happened at the beginning, thinking that what A Liang said before was just a way to fool himself, but every time Xiao Yuan went deep, she was pushed away by A Liang to calm her down and not forget her promise.
I can only give up, but I don't know what attitude Liang will have if he knows that he is not a virgin. But I think he and Liang are in love, and he will never break up with himself because of this kind of thing, so he will continue his pure love with Liang with peace of mind.
Later, when A Liang proposed to Xiao Yuan, she unexpectedly gave Xiao Yuan a white jade ring, saying that she was as flawless as this jade and would cherish it in the future. Xiao Yuan's eyes are full of brightness at this time. He has already been carried away by love, so he doesn't care about other things.
However, when the wedding approached, A Liang chose white as the main color of the wedding dress and home decoration. She finally realized that A Liang had really been carrying out his life creed, and used it as a template to always ask the other party and everything around him.
Xiao Yuan realized the seriousness of the problem at this time, struggling to tell Ah Liang the truth, but seeing Ah Liang's joyful preparations for the wedding, she didn't want to throw cold water on him at this time, so she hesitated to arrive at the wedding night. In fact, Xiao Yuan discussed this issue with her best friend before, but her best friend laughed at her and made her pretend to be shy that night, which would definitely fool her.
That night, the atmosphere was just right. A Liang took out a white towel and spread it on the bed. He said that this sacred moment will be remembered forever. At this point, Xiao Yuan had to admit that she was not a virgin and had a boyfriend before. She thought A Liang would forgive herself for their relationship for so many years.
Who knows A Liang roared, "Let's divorce, you are unclean, I am completely honest with you, but you have been deceiving me ..." Xiao Yuan suddenly turned around, "I am not unclean, this is a normal communication process, there are so many absolute things between men and women."
"You have no bottom line. If you cheat once, you will cheat again. Who knows how many men you have slept with, you are not clean. " Xiao Yuan never thought that he would become like this.
"The unclean person is you, and your thoughts are dirty. We have been together for so long. Don't you know what I am? You actually slandered me like this. " "I slander you. Who lied to me at the beginning? I said I signed a letter of commitment and everything was lying to me. What I hate most is that others lie to me! " With that, Liang pushed the handle out of the bedroom and closed the door.
Sitting alone on the sofa opposite the door, Xiao Yuan received a text message from A Liang in the middle of the night, "Let's get a divorce. I don't dislike your uncleanness, but our beginning is based on deception and lies. I don't think it is necessary to continue this relationship. Let's get together and go, don't make it too ugly. "
I don't know if you have seen Desert Flower directed by holman. Based on his own personal experience, the hero tells the story of a girl who was circumcised at the age of three in Somalia. People who have paid a little attention to the relevant news may have long known what kind of torture circumcision is, and it is an inhuman destruction of women. In addition to the nobility of ideological and cultural level, I think this is the most extreme embodiment of the male-dominated society's requirement for women to "keep their bodies as jade".
Although there are many similar things happening in China, it is a commendable virtue to lead an honest and clean life. "Travels of Lao Can" wrote, "But one or two out of ten people will never move." Although this society has advocated freedom of marriage and love, not many people really care whether they are virgins before marriage. After all, in today's emphasis on gender equality, we should make fewer unusual demands on women. But in my opinion, Xiao Yuan and A Liang didn't really miss each other because of this incident.
Liang He, regardless of their differences in ideas, is at fault in this matter. If we just think that Liang's conservative thinking and behavior led to their final divorce. Then you are all wet, because this incident, because of Xiao Yuan's deception, led to the end of the divorce, because it was a mistake at the beginning.
If Xiao Yuan knew that A Liang had this insistence, he could tell the truth clearly. Then, if A Liang chooses to break up at that time, you can say that A Liang and Xiao Yuan are at odds and he is not open. However, because Xiao Yuan knew A Liang's insistence, he lied to A Liang and made it clear that he agreed with A Liang's behavior.
So in the beginning, Xiao Yuan deliberately concealed it. Since she doesn't agree with other people's views, why did you come clean? If you don't agree with the view of "lead an honest and clean life as jade", you can refuse, refuse and even criticize, but you can't cheat.
On the other hand, A Liang did a good job. Maybe he knew his persistence was out of place in today's society, so he clearly told Xiao Yuan what kind of person he was before their love relationship began.
I think the two people in this story, not only Xiao Yuan, but also A Liang, were injured, because he was full of joy for so many years and thought he had found the right person, but he lived in deception from beginning to end.
We are always used to taking care of the weak in a relationship and think that women will always be the injured party, but this time, I think we should all change this concept.
There are everyone in this society now. We want to disguise ourselves to get more happiness, and we want to get happiness that doesn't belong to us by cheating. Once a lie is exposed, there will only be countless lies. What seems to be obtained through deception is actually like a bubble in the sun, which can't stand the slightest wind and rain.