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Don't panic. Five things to do when you screw things up.
Don't panic. Five things to do when you screw things up.

Don't panic, five things to do if you screw things up. When things happen, it is good to react quickly, but you must make things clear before making a decision, otherwise it will easily complicate things. If things are not clear, act quickly. Not only can't help, but it may also screw things up. Don't panic. Five things to do when you screw things up.

Don't panic, five things to do if you screw things up. Each of us has experienced these experiences several times, but it is never a pleasant idea to put them into practice. The point is that we often screw things up-sometimes the results are bad. Maybe you said something wrong on impulse, or did something you would never have done if it weren't for your emotional state. We've all been through this. It's painful. However, the real key is to figure out what to do afterwards.

If you don't behave well, it's not the end of the world. The key is how to deal with the consequences when an error occurs. If you screw up at work or make a little mistake at home, here are five things to do when you screw up.

1, apologize immediately

When you make any mistake, saying "I'm sorry" is really the best strategy. Indifference is an insult, which means that you don't care at all, which will leave a very rude impression. Therefore, you should apologize to all parties concerned immediately.

You may have to admit your shortcomings at some point, but this is the price of imperfection. Choosing a more decent path and apologizing for your mistakes may be more embarrassing than burying your head in the sand, but it will also win you respect, friends, forgiveness and self-esteem. So, when you screw up, apologize sincerely and get back to work immediately.

2. Get some ideas and reality checks.

When you screw things up, the most important thing is to take a step back and look at the current situation from some angles and/or reality. I hope the situation you just incited is not too serious (for example, you may be sentenced in a criminal court, or your family will never talk to you again). If so, it will be helpful to try to evaluate your actions logically and objectively.

If your mistake can be remedied, you should be grateful. Although this may affect people you care about, people you work with or people you spend time with, you may be able to solve this problem. Chances are you didn't hurt anyone, ruined anyone's life, or caused anyone great pain. As the great philosopher Cicero said, "Dum spiro spero" means, "As long as I live, I hope."

Make a plan to ensure that this situation will not happen again.

It doesn't matter if you make mistakes; Everyone makes mistakes sometimes (yes, even the perfect girl who is as sweet as pie in the office or the perfect man on the street). The point is that it is inevitable to screw up, but in the long run, what we do is to ensure that it won't happen again, which is really important. So, make a plan.

Recognize exactly what you did wrong and think about what you can do in the future to prevent this from happening again. Learn something, remember something, and put things in the right place-* * * Work together. When you have arranged your plan, go to the person who was offended or affected by your mistake, tell them what measures you will take to prevent it from happening again, and then let the problem go naturally. It is human nature to make mistakes, but what makes you a good person is how you recover from your mistakes and make sure that you won't hurt the same person like that again.

Step 4 take a break

One of the best ways is to keep yourself out of the environment where mistakes occur, and don't let your thoughts stay in the status quo. Staying in the present environment and thinking about your mistakes will only make you lose your attention, reduce your ability to work and live in that situation, and eventually fall into the whirlpool of shame.

Go and have a rest; Leave the office, or home, or anywhere, and take a walk somewhere. Get yourself out of the negative brain space, which will continue to haunt your brain and affect your ability to become a normal and functional person. Spend 15 minutes to concentrate and make a plan.

Step 5 be kind to yourself

Finally, after feeling guilty and sad about a mistake, practice a little self-sympathy. In this world, we are expected to be perfect people, have a perfect body and an ideal life, and the idea of screwing things up is terrible. But this is not the case. You are alone. It's okay to screw up.

Don't blame yourself, and don't dwell on your mistakes, so as not to affect your mental health and your ability to be yourself in front of friends, colleagues and lovers. They are human beings, and most of them are willing to help you make amends and make you sincerely apologize. Take a deep breath, try to calm yourself down and remember that this is not the end of the world. You can start over at any time. When you hit your head on the pillow, just remember Scarlett O 'Hara's classic and life-affirming motto: "After all, tomorrow is another day!" "

Don't panic, five things to do if you screw things up. Although perfectionism is usually regarded as believing that you want to be perfect or being obsessed with doing things completely right, perfectionists can also express it in other subtle ways:

Do you want to check it again? Procrastination, thinking that now is not the best time to start something, is always the first person to find the mistake.

In fact, it reflects more than we thought, which may be a good thing or a bad thing.

"Perfectionism is not just urging yourself to do your best to achieve your goals;" Psychologist Thomas S. Greenspon said. He recently published a paper on "the antidote to perfectionism", which was published in Psychology in School.

In other words, perfectionism stems from anxiety, worry and doubt, not simply the basic idea of doing things well.

Psychology behind perfectionism

Why do some people pay so much attention to perfectionism? There are several reasons why this personality trait is stronger in some people than others, which can be attributed to a certain way of thinking.

Some people regard mistakes as lessons, while perfectionists regard mistakes as personal shortcomings. They will overcome themselves psychologically and feel the feeling of failure-that is, perfectionism stems from the fear of failure.

Another source of perfectionism is the problem of self. Many people want things to be perfect, because they have a mentality of caring about what others think of them-if something doesn't reach a certain standard, it will get a negative evaluation.

Childhood experience can also make perfectionism develop in your character, especially when you learn from your parents or guardians that if you are not perfect, you can't be likable. This goes beyond your way of thinking and runs through your work and interpersonal relationships until you reach adulthood.

Of course, during your years of education, these restrictive rules can be taught to you when you are young. It is very important to obey the rules. If you violate these rules in any way, or don't follow them, it will do you harm.

How did perfectionism ruin you?

Many people will be comforted to be a perfectionist, but perfectionists create perfection just like myths and legends.

One disadvantage of it is that it wastes time to do something that pursues perfection, but it will only reduce your efficiency.

Spending more time on something often creates an illusion-that is, we think we are improving something, but this time is not necessarily high-quality time, but it will hinder your performance.

For example, suppose you are working on an important project for your department, which accounts for 15% of the company's sales, and it took you four months to complete it. Another colleague completed another project within one month, accounting for only 7% of the company's total sales. Although this did not bring more sales, your colleagues had time to complete more projects, which brought 2 1% sales.

This is an example that fast failure is actually better than slow success. When you fail quickly, you will learn more in a shorter time and prepare for future success in advance, which perfectionism prevents you from doing.

How to change your perfectionism?

If you think perfectionism is holding you back, maybe it's time to change your habits and ways of thinking. You can adopt the following strategies to change your perfectionism and improve your success in life.

Give up the "all or nothing" mentality.

When it comes to perfectionism, a common mentality is that either you want to do something best or you don't want to do anything. But the problem is that people deny the importance of this process. Success comes from the experience and insights gained from this process, which gives you the opportunity to adjust and apply these experiences and insights to achieve future success. This undoubtedly reduces the chance of failure, but perfectionists may strongly deny it.

Remember the 80/20 and 70% rules.

When it comes to perfectionism, it is sometimes easy to ignore the essence of things, but as long as the essence is obvious, there is no need for 100% perfection. Only 70% is really needed for success, and then you can fine-tune it. In this way, you can see the final result more clearly and help you find potential problems.

The law of 80 and 20 is a good rule to remember-that is, 20% efforts can achieve 80% results. A little more won't have much impact, and it also gives you room to adjust the details later.

Actively seek positive feedback.

Feedback is every perfectionist's worst nightmare. Although it is ideal to get both positive and negative feedback at the same time, it is something that perfectionists will struggle with when they realize their shortcomings and deficiencies. Therefore, seeking positive feedback on a regular basis can help offset this and get the brain used to the balance of opinions.

Distinguish between "necessary items" and "all items"

Many ideas are good, unless perfectionism is your weakness. Priority is the key, but perfectionists find it difficult to ignore the ideas they think should be included. However, this is not conducive to the quality of your work or project, and may lead you to fall behind or add extra pressure to yourself.

Before you start any project, make sure you create a list of "must do" and "everything". Let "must have" become an absolute priority, and only when time permits can "have" become a priority.

Celebrate a small victory every day.

Perfectionists are often negative, so writing down three achievements every day can help turn this mentality into a positive one. From "I got up earlier than the alarm clock today" to "I met a new and interesting person", every little thing can make the brain think positively and divert its attention from the negative aspects.

A study explains that it all comes down to the interaction between certain chemicals and the reward system in our brains, which gives us a sense of accomplishment. This feeling will inspire us to repeat this process again to realize it. Thinking positive things every day, no matter how small, can train your brain to be more positive.

Set realistic goals

Setting unrealistic goals is an obvious feature of perfectionists, which will eventually lead to feelings of inadequacy because they are difficult to achieve. Suppose you are an actor and your goal is to become a Hollywood star in one year, or you want to publish a successful book in the next six months, but you haven't written a word-although this may happen, in fact you will be disappointed.

It is good to have a goal, but setting the standard too high will make people feel depressed and lack motivation. Therefore, you can improve your desire in various ways, but don't make yourself feel inadequate.

Pay attention to the overall situation

You can't always destroy your inner perfectionism, but you can become a "healthy perfectionist". To do this, you should always keep in mind the overall situation. Whenever you start to delve into one aspect or detail of a project, ask yourself how much impact it will have on the final result. If you only contribute about 2%, then you need to let go. This is an example of opportunity cost. In this example, by focusing on only one idea, you may lose other methods or options.

Taking a step back before investing can save a lot of time and give you more time to focus on better results.