This is the problem. As a manager, how should I practice?
Anyone who leads a team should have the experience that it is easy to work hard on their own, but it is too difficult to achieve others. This kind of challenge is particularly prominent in managers with particularly strong personal ability. Because the more capable managers are, the easier it is to do everything by themselves, and they are not used to letting team members make decisions because they are not at ease.
But the question is, why don't managers delegate? Is it because they naturally like to work? Of course not. In the "communication training camp for managers", students often come to tell me his troubles and say, "Xiaohua, I also want my subordinates to solve their own problems, but as soon as he meets difficulties and can't solve problems, he comes to me for a solution. I repeatedly told him to be proactive and planned, but he couldn't. I don't care? "
This question is very reasonable, but wait a minute. If you have the same idea, at this moment, I want you to think about a question: whenever a subordinate comes to you with a problem, does he really not know what to do? Or did we not give him a chance to tell him what to do?
If you don't believe me, let's do something together now. From now on, if you don't drive, please close your eyes for one minute. Let's recall that many subordinates came to me two days ago and asked me what to do with this and that. So:
Look, isn't it a little shocking?
And as we all know, in the dialogue between subordinates and superiors, in fact, most of the information has been filtered and cut. Please note that this is not necessarily malicious. Maybe it's because he wants to save the leader's time, maybe it's because he wants to protect himself, to achieve his goal more easily, and to complete communication as soon as possible, he will definitely block out some information intentionally or unintentionally.
We don't have all the information when the information has been blocked and cut, but in the communication with my subordinates, I have been talking and outputting information, and the subordinates finally take away only my limited and not necessarily correct solutions. Right?
So you see, many managers are actually quite responsible, giving their subordinates a lot of advice and guidance, hoping to help them solve problems and reduce their burden. This is why, if we find that our subordinates are still not in place afterwards, we will feel very angry and even wronged.
But what I want to remind you is, don't be angry and wronged in a hurry. Remember this sentence: let employees learn to solve problems by themselves. As managers, don't express opinions in a hurry, but learn to ask questions first.
I'll do a self-examination first. I used to be the manager of such a panacea. Because I always feel that I have a lot more experience than the young people in the company, and I am busy and have no time. Then I'll tell you the answer, and then you do it quickly. Isn't that the best help for you? Besides, I have no reservations about you.
I feel that I have done a good job, but it will actually lead to great frustration on the other side, forming a bad habit of doing things without thinking and only handing in questions.
Therefore, when communicating with subordinates, managers must pay attention to asking questions instead of expressing opinions, which is much more useful than telling them what to do.
Can all questions help subordinates find answers? Of course not. You must pay attention to how to ask questions.
I have prepared a good list of questions for you. There are only four questions in it. You can paste this list directly on your notebook, and remind yourself to read it before you speak every time you talk to your subordinates. If you ask a good question, it will definitely help your subordinates to open their minds and build confidence.
Is it simple? This problem can be used in various scenarios.
At this time, you must remind yourself not to say or do anything, even if you really know. Be sure to say, "I want to hear your opinion first." Why not say it first? "
I used to make such mistakes. When people asked me, I said, "It's not easy. I tell you, write it down and do it. " So people in our company always call me machine gun. Whoever asks me a question, I will shoot someone.
However, please note that subordinates clearly have plans, even if they are immature, but leaders will never have the opportunity to say that under this mode, wrong path dependence will be formed. Because he knows that you can solve anything, of course he will choose to give it to you. Because it is simple and labor-saving, and there is no responsibility.
Therefore, there is a saying in the workplace called "helicopter leadership". What is a helicopter? Is hovering over the heads of subordinates all day, watching with searchlights, ready to jump straight. For ourselves, time has been completely torn. At the same time, we also feel very angry, saying that these subordinates do not grow up, do not work hard, and do not take the initiative to think. You see, this is the problem. It's completely misplaced.
So be wary of becoming a helicopter leader. When subordinates ask questions, they must learn to ask him first, and then ask his thoughts first. This question is to guide your subordinates to think and analyze problems independently, and at the same time, it can make him feel that his opinions will be seen and respected and valued by the leaders.
Of course, you may ask, what if he can't say it? For example, your subordinates say, "Ah? I have no idea. " Then you can ask, "What do you know now?"
A person can't have neither ideas nor information, can he? Then where did his problem come from?
Of course, there are extended situations, such as the decision-making of this issue is more complicated or more risky. At this time, you can ask in another way and ask some hypothetical questions that don't require him to take responsibility. For example, what conditions do you think will change this situation?
Let me give you an example. For example, your subordinates come to you and say, "A customer threatened us and said that he would cancel the contract with us because we didn't meet one of his needs, and now he is in a hurry. What should I do? "
At this time, if you directly talk to him about the plan, he may be a little scared. Then you can ask him in another way:
If this demand is met, do you think this customer will cooperate with us in six months?
If we make this decision today, do you think this decision will change after half a year or a year?
Open the time dimension first and ask hypothetical questions. Because hypothetical questions don't need to take responsibility, let subordinates think without burden.
For example, my boss, Luo Pang, the chairman of our company, often asks me a kind of questions, especially when I come across important and difficult decisions. Luo Pang said, "Forget it, there is no point in discussing it now. Let me ask you a question. Do you still want to make this product in five years? " Five years later, if this product is here, will you feel happy? "
I think this kind of question is very useful to me, because it opens the time dimension, broadens my horizons and makes a decision when I think about something.
Of course, if you were not a manager who would ask questions like this before, then we can't ask you to start asking questions today, and your subordinates will take the initiative to think tomorrow. Because he has been domesticated by you in the long work.
So at this time, we will let them start to restart gradually through various formal and informal communication methods. At this time, you should be patient, let them re-establish their sense of security in the working environment and their relationship with you, and gradually make them willing to take responsibility.
Well, if your subordinate has spoken his mind or provided some information about the current situation, you can ask him the second question.
For example, a subordinate asks you, "What should we do if this customer threatens to cancel our contract?"
Your first question made him say some thoughts, and then you can ask him, "What do you need me to do now?"
To put it bluntly, let him be the person in charge of this matter and let him send you a job directly. In fact, it is also to urge him to think and then make demands on you. In this way, after a long time, your subordinates will have a change. They will regard you as a resource instead of a beggar.
If you keep asking him to give you a specific job: first, you will be more relaxed; Second, he also knows that he is responsible for this matter. The monkey is on his back. If he wants to think well, he needs to know that he needs to make correct and accurate resource requirements for the leaders.
Teacher Chen, our psychologist, shared this method in family communication. Whatever you say, add "OK?" As long as you are willing to add these three words, no one will quarrel.
So managers should also learn to use this kind of speech, and of course you can be flexible. For example:
You see, this is also a good question. In this part, you can either close the previous public discussion or give your own suggestions to help your subordinates grasp the direction and avoid him going astray. But because you asked "OK, OK, let's talk", he will feel that he still has the sense of control in his own hands.
Before I say this question, I want to introduce you to someone. This man is Simon, the legendary psychological counselor.
When he was doing psychological counseling in his early years, he started a school of family therapy, which had a great influence on the whole psychological counseling itself. Occasionally, he will accept the invitation of a large family business in Germany to give a lecture to the board of directors. The enterprise admires him very much, saying that all these things you said are what our enterprise needs to do.
Then Simon seldom did family therapy, and he became a particularly outstanding corporate executive coach in Germany, because he found the same psychological counseling methodology useful in improving the relationship between executives and the board of directors.
After years of experience in psychological counseling research and executive coaching, Simon summed up one point. He said: There is a big problem among all the problems. If as a manager, you can only ask your subordinates one question, it must be this question.
What's the problem? Many students may think when they hear this, is this problem very complicated? Is it difficult to master?
No, Simon said, there are only three words in this question, which is called: Then what? You may not ask the first three questions, but as a manager, you must ask this question: "Then what?"
No matter how many questions the other person has, you just ask, and then what? Then you will find that the truth must be behind, and what is said in front is smoke bombs.
Simon said that his consultants often come to talk to him for two hours, but just ask "then" and you will find that the questions in the first two hours are not substantive at all. By constantly asking, "Then what?" And layer by layer, the truth can be forced out.
When I heard Simon's class, I was shocked, indeed. Now I want to ask you to reflect. As a superior, how many times have you asked your subordinates "and then?" ? Or when he reports to you, you can't wait to give him so-called mature experience.
What if we didn't ask two questions in a conversation? "To be sure, we didn't get all the information and exhausted all the ideas of our subordinates.
Of course, there is also a little reminder here. After all, we should make appropriate adjustments according to our own culture. We are asking questions, not interrogating prisoners.
Before, a classmate asked me if "then" would make the other party collapse. I said, sure, what if you keep asking? then what Of course it will put a lot of pressure on your subordinates.
Therefore, every time you ask, you should change the way you ask.
For example, you ask, and then what? He tells you some information, you respond positively, the other party confirms it, that's right, that's what I mean, and then you ask:
Therefore, "that what" is a symbol, it is not just these three words, but in this way to establish a dialogue relationship. These three words remind us to be curious and open to our subordinates at all times. In the process of helping subordinates find answers, we often have unexpected gains ourselves.
Well, how to use the four questions to stimulate subordinates' initiative and problem-solving ability is basically over.
In fact, this set of skills can be used not only by yourself, but also by the team. For example, as a superior, if you want to promote someone, I suggest you give him this list as a gift. Because when he transforms into a manager, he must learn the correct way of speaking.
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