After doing this, many things will come naturally. Now many people are generally afraid of getting married, but the reason is not what you said. Nothing will come naturally, just like when I was 20 years old, I couldn't wash clothes, let alone cook, but after I went out to work, I stopped washing clothes and started washing casually. A long time will come naturally now. A lot of things are like this. When you can't do anything, you will have the motivation to learn. Don't worry, you won't care about others, and your future husband will care about you. I hope it is long. Don't worry.
I am afraid of getting married, too. I feel terrible to hear people say that I am married and so far away from myself. Just like you said. The pressure is really great now. Houses and cars are all issues we should consider.
2. What if you are afraid of getting married?
Interpretation of modern people's fear of marriage
"I have a special function? My right hand has been twitching for two days, and now my left ear has been jumping. "
Q Since the news that he is about to get married was announced, he has reported to us the renovation of his new house every day, which is to describe his recent series of creepy discoveries. At first, he felt that Pingtou was carrying a backpack on his way to and from work, and followed him with willow leaves in his hand. Later, he heard someone knocking on the floor rhythmically next door every midnight.
"He is a typical fear of marriage's syndrome." "Glasses" pushed his glasses beside him thoughtfully.
From the moment the bride's veil was unveiled, endless pain began.
A series of quarrels are inevitable. Wipe the table and sweep the floor to find food, cook, go shopping, where to buy things, what size and style to buy, work overtime on Saturday and Sunday and come home late from work, what to bring back to my mother-in-law's house several times a week, how much salary, bonus and overtime pay, and whether you are jealous or not. You will feel that getting married is like entering a quarrel training class. Your eyes are straight, your legs are weak, your brain is dull and your cerebellum is calcified. Nowadays, people are either only children or spoiled, and no one can take care of them. Everyone wants each other to take care of themselves. What men think is that women should be ladies in the living room and economists in the kitchen; Women think men should be versatile: romantic masters in love, skillful craftsmen in carrying and mending, generous tycoons in traveling and shopping, and indifferent country boys in the face of temptation.
Freedom is gone. Go home if you want, and eat if you want. You can watch TV at any time. Go out if you want, and talk to whoever you want. Do you want to be alone for a while, or don't talk if you want to? Unless I die! In the future, I will spend less time with those stupid buddies who have no ability, and I will try to earn some money when I have time. Don't get entangled with those crazy girls, buy this and that every day, or you won't learn how to cook, stir-fry, clean your room and embroider.
Children are lovely as long as they belong to others. If it's your own, cuteness is just a small wrinkle in a pleated skirt. You must worry endlessly. Worried about what milk powder he eats, what clothes he wears and what clothes he doesn't take a shower. I'm worried about what school he goes to, whether he wants to learn dance, piano, painting, physical education, what his major is like, whether he has a chance of promotion, whether he is puppy love, and whether his girlfriend has the ability. You must also spend money endlessly. When I was young, I didn't even mention food and clothing. From kindergarten to high school graduation, tuition fees have increased year by year. Brand-name clothes are not necessary, and school supplies are so gaudy that you can suffocate. You have to pay for all kinds of long classes, and you can't leave behind what others have.
After rolling around for more than ten years, I finally got a stable life and a successful career. My husband and wife are doing well, and my children are growing up. It's time for a midlife crisis.
"So, don't get married, it's a dark bottomless abyss." "Glasses" stubbed out cigarette butts and stretched himself. We were all in a cold sweat, looked at each other and looked at the "glasses" with trepidation.
"Glasses" slowly lit another cigarette. "It's just that you are all here. By the way, let everyone know that I'm getting married next week."
-pathological analysis of celebrity records:
This is a typical psychological disease in modern society, with complicated causes. Mainly because the life of modern people is relatively tense, everyone always longs for a free and rambling life. Because people often hear about marriage, especially when it comes to the contradictions and responsibilities between husband and wife, there will be a natural fear and escape.
Cohabitation before marriage is also one of the factors that produce fear of marriage. Nowadays, most people are tolerant of cohabitation, so cohabitation is becoming more and more common, which makes unmarried young people's expectations for marriage weakened to a considerable extent. Young people lose the novelty of marriage because of cohabitation, but they pay more attention to their responsibilities after marriage, thus showing their fear of marriage.
The evolution of the wedding is also an important reason for fear of marriage. The original marriage mode was mostly arranged by parents, but now it is mostly arranged by young people themselves. Many complicated things make young people feel tired and scared when they get married.
3. What if you are afraid of getting married?
Because you're not ready to get married.
It's time to have enough feelings and age, but I may still have some doubts about marriage. This doubt is not about the stability and foundation of your relationship.
To put it bluntly, I just can't accept it at the moment.
In this case, nobody can help you. The best solution is to find your boyfriend, make it clear to him, tell him what you really think and feel, and tell him how you feel now. We can discuss it slowly according to the current situation, and we can also listen to his opinions and suggestions. Don't hold it to yourself. It can only be your own imagination, and your boyfriend doesn't know. If you don't tell him when he asks you, he won't understand, which will lead to misunderstanding. For example, he thinks you are hiding something from him or don't love him or even trust him.
Serious words may cause mutual suspicion, which is not impossible.
You've been on his side for four years, saying he's really old. If you spend it, it must be him who is worried.
Feelings are between you and him, and marriage is between you two. Think carefully about whether to marry him or not. You can't push the boat impulsively, and you can't worry about dragging your feet back and forth.
Fear of marriage may be due to the so-called failed marriage seen on TV media, or it may be due to parents muttering about urging themselves to get married every day, which makes them feel very stressed and powerless, or it may be that you still can't rely on him and feel insecure with him, and you have been hesitating whether he can be responsible for you wholeheartedly.
What I want to say is, face it bravely and don't worry about marriage back and forth because of fear. This is no small matter.
4. What if you are afraid of getting married?
90% people will have this psychological phenomenon before getting married, and some will run away at the wedding. Generally speaking, they are worried about their future life, or they like their present life very much and think that marriage will become a reality. Because there are many negative reports about marriage, but the media always seems to do so. They always pay attention to suffering, and there are few positive reports. Although married life will be relatively pragmatic, marriage has its own unique charm. I hope you can find it and wish you happiness.
I think that women's fear of marriage is not a lifetime, but only a stage. Both men and women need to get married, and she is still afraid because she has not reached the required level. At present, she just needs to be in love. Falling in love and getting married is an emotional upgrade. Short love time will affect the quality of married life, but it is not complete. People always need to be liked and liked to fall in love, and then they need to get married. Some people need to step by step in these three stages, and some people can advance.
5. Why are women afraid of getting married?
"Fear of devaluation" theory.
Most women think that unmarried status is a kind of capital, so it is unexpected that there will be many suitors and choices. Is it bad to be pursued by men? I will send you a bunch of roses today, pick you up from work tomorrow, and take you to a place where someone plays the violin to eat western food the day after tomorrow. Some people even envy themselves. It feels good to be pampered like a princess.
What if I get married? "Fear of the future" theory. Women feel different from men when they get married.
As the saying goes, marry a chicken and follow a dog, and enjoy your life, otherwise.
Who can foresee what will happen to this man in the future? Will it develop? Will it work? You'll still get nowhere. The other sisters married well. What if they don't get married well? What if someone else becomes an official wife and a rich wife, and she is an ordinary housewife? Who can predict the future? Women seem to entrust themselves to each other when they get married, and their fate seems to rise and fall with each other.
So the uncertainty of the future makes women more afraid of getting married. "Afraid of children" said.
A woman is young when she gets married, and then she has children, and her life is over. Many women don't want to have children, but in the end it is always difficult to fight against social laws.
The process of pregnancy in October can only be understood by those who have experienced it personally. So maternal love is the greatest.
But what does this greatness mean? How many women forget themselves after marriage, all for their children, for their husbands and for this family.
I forgot my appearance, my ideal, my occupation, my hobbies, and so on. Modern women understand this, so they are afraid.
I used to be afraid and uneasy, and I thought I couldn't overcome it. However, I don't know when I woke up. It seems that everything has calmed down. I have the courage to face such great changes in my life and all possible situations in the future, because I have figured out that my destiny is in my own hands.
I am still independent, still lovely and still have dreams.