When young Dai men and women get married, they generally practice the custom of living from the wife's house, that is, the man goes to the woman's house, so the wedding is mainly held in the woman's house. Before the wedding, the bride and groom will go to the Buddhist temple to worship Buddha and pray for good luck and happiness and grow old together.
There are many ways for young Dai men and women to fall in love, and there is a popular activity among Dai people called "string divination". That is, unmarried boys find unmarried girls to fall in love at festivals or parties. This kind of activity is usually carried out during the water-splashing festival, dragon boat race and rush pendulum. Young men and women are singing and dancing, starting in the evening and ending late at night.
In addition, there is a more peculiar form of "selling chicken". When the festival comes, some Dai girls kill their own fat chickens and stew them. If the young man who comes to buy chicken is not satisfied with the girl, the girl will double the money. If a girl has a crush on a young boy, she will bow her head shyly and avoid the boy's eyes. If the boys are interested, they will walk into the quiet Woods with chickens and stools and pour out their love to each other.
The courtship of Dai boys is also very strange. No matter spring, summer, autumn and winter, boys will wrap themselves in a wide blanket when looking for a couple, showing only two eyes. They stood by the roadside, waiting for the arrival of the girl, which is also a temporary sign of unmarried boys. The sign of a girl without a partner is to wear a light-colored coat, trousers and a small waist. As long as a young man sees a girl dressed like this passing by, he can go forward and make love. If a girl has a crush on a young man, he will take off the blanket and take the girl's hand and leave the road to discuss in detail.
When the relationship between the two parties is mature, the man usually asks his uncle or menstruation to propose marriage, and the other party can get married after agreeing.
Pick up the bride (in a sedan chair) for the wedding.
Dai marriage custom
On the wedding day, many relatives and friends sent by the man's family came to the woman's house to attend the wedding. Accompanied by the groom, they knocked on the elephant foot drum and the Tang drum all the way and happily came to the woman's house. They also set off firecrackers and birds along the way to increase the festive atmosphere and drive away evil spirits. The wedding begins at the woman's door: a carpet is laid on the floor, a small altar is placed on it, and flowers and fruit wine are placed on the table. The bride and groom, dressed in beautiful national costumes, sat side by side in front of the tapestry and asked the monk to recite the scriptures. After reading, the monk tied colored silk threads on the wrists of the bride and groom respectively to show their blessings. Then, if the man wants to walk into the woman's house, he needs to go through several checkpoints: first, when he arrives at the door, the bamboo door has been closed, and he needs to set off firecrackers and pay a gift before opening the door for the man to pass; Second, when climbing the bamboo building, the man was stopped by the woman's people, and the man had to pay to climb the building; Third, after entering the house, the bride was hidden and could not see the bride. The man had to make a ceremony and propose a toast. After several entreaties and twists and turns, the bride was sent out. This series of processes contains the meaning of testing the groom and is full of joy and festive atmosphere.
Tie line ceremony
Dai marriage custom
In the hall of Zhulou, there is a small table with two conical hats made of banana leaves on it and a cooked male hen under it. There are also gifts from the man to the woman on the table, such as clothes, skirts, silver belts, bracelets and so on. In addition, there are glutinous rice, brown sugar, bananas, salt, white lines and so on. At the beginning of the wedding ceremony, the bride and groom knelt side by side at the wedding table to receive the blessing of the old man and the congratulations of the guests. Then, the wedding ceremony will send a congratulatory message, and all the people present will put their right hands on the table and bow their heads to listen to the congratulatory message. After the congratulatory message, the bride and groom each tear off a ball of glutinous rice from the table, dip it in wine, then order chicken, salt and white thread three times, and then put the rice ball back on the table after the order. In this way, the officiant picked up a long white line on the table, bypassed the shoulders of the bride and groom from left to right, and put both ends of the line on the wedding table, indicating that their "souls" have been tied together and will never be separated. Then, the old people here also picked up the white thread and tied it on the wrists of the bride and groom, wishing the newlyweds happiness and good luck. The son born will plow fields and build houses, and the girl born will weave and plant trees. ...
After tying the thread, one chicken on the table was dedicated to the wedding ceremony and the other was shared with the boys. I wish them find their beloved girl as soon as possible and tie the thread happily. The rest of the things are placed next to the curtains of the newlyweds and can't be eaten for three days.
After tying the thread, we began to entertain the guests. Most of the dishes on the table are bland, and a bowl of blood-nourishing stew symbolizes the auspiciousness of marriage. During the dinner, the bride and groom should politely propose a toast to the guests, and the guests will also ask various questions to answer, and some people will ask the bride and groom to perform programs. It will make everyone laugh from time to time and the atmosphere will be warm and active.
sing
Dai marriage custom
During the wedding, singing by A Dai singer Zanha is essential. Dai people often say that a wedding without Zanha is not lively and the wine is not good. Therefore, the wedding is an opportunity for men and women to show their talents. When people are eating and drinking, listening to the songs of praise and singing to a wonderful place, people will burst into cheers of "water, water, water". Listen, this is a song of praise:
Today is the time for the phoenix to dance,/Today is the time for complacency,/On auspicious days,/All the guests are the most respected. /Welcome, ladies and gentlemen,/I want to sing the best and most beautiful songs. /First of all, I wish the newlyweds,/They are good children in the world,/As beautiful as bananas,/As strange as coconuts.
After Zanha sang, the wedding guests danced with the bride and groom. In the sound of drums and elephant feet, people gather in the courtyard or square to dance all night.
At dawn the next day, the groom will return to his parents' home and his wife's home at night. On the third day, the man's parents came to the woman's house to recognize relatives with cold noodles and other things, and sent a piece of cold noodles to relatives and friends respectively. On the fifth day after marriage, the bride and groom took cold noodles to the man's house to recognize their relatives, and at the same time gave a piece of cold noodles to relatives and friends, who also gave gifts to the bride. At this point, the whole wedding is over.
after marriage
After marriage, the man usually lives in the woman's house for three years, and then he can take his wife back to the man's house. After living in the man's house for three years, you can return to the woman's house. This is called "three years to go, three years to come". It was not until the couple built their own houses and became financially independent that they left their parents and set up their own small family. With the development of the times, many brides and grooms now build their own houses and form their own small families after marriage.
After the Dai people get married, the husband and wife are loving and harmonious, and rarely divorce. In the case of divorce, one party handed the other a pair of wax strips, or both parties pulled a piece of white cloth and cut it from it, which is considered divorce. If one of the husband and wife dies, no matter how old they are, a divorce ceremony will be held: the living will tie a cotton thread to the coffin of the deceased, and an old man will cut the cotton thread with a knife at the funeral to sever the relationship between the living and the deceased.