In my opinion, there are only two situations in which men and women can achieve what each other expects.
First, the feelings are stable, they know each other well enough, and they get along with each other like husband and wife. The only difference is that they didn't get the certificate. In this case, there is actually no need to discuss this issue. Getting the license is really just going out for dinner and picking it up on the way.
Second, all the wedding matters have been basically determined. Confirmation means paying all the deposits that should be paid, and there won't be too many variables. The woman can get the certificate with the other party first.
In fact, the existence of this problem is because men and women now lack too much respect for marriage. When you treat marriage as a child's play, don't blame each other for their own small calculations.