First, the bride price and dowry are reasonable.
In ancient times, the marriage system was group marriage system and rob marriage system. Marriage is casual, there is no marriage in the strict sense, as long as everyone thinks it is appropriate.
However, after entering civilized society, the formation of monogamy makes marriage very important, and at the same time, it becomes more complicated in etiquette.
As we all know, in the era of Confucianism, unmarried men and women can't meet each other. Most marriages follow the orders of parents and the words of matchmakers. Under the arrangement of the elders and the introduction of the matchmaker, they got married. This kind of marriage leads to blind marriage and dumb marriage for both husband and wife. On the objective level, it has its difficulties, that is, the six rites of marriage stipulated in the Book of Rites.
These six ceremonies are: accepting lottery, asking names, Najib, accepting gifts, inviting guests, and welcoming them in person.
In modern times, bride price and dowry are still our cultural traditions, which are reasonable and can't be killed with a stick.
Second, bride price and dowry are parents' beautiful expectations.
No matter what age, bride price and dowry are the added bricks of the small family, and they are the beautiful expectations of both parents for the newlyweds.
From today's point of view, this is the start-up fund given by both parents to the small family, and it is the property of husband and wife.
Bride price plus dowry is sometimes a considerable financial support for young people. As long as it is well managed, it can be used as a start-up fund for small families, making married life easier and enjoying the sweetness of life.
Therefore, since there is a bride price, the woman's parents should also consider the issue of dowry.
1. Both parents should show that they have property for the young couple.
Although the bride price is the property given to the woman by the man or his parents, the dowry is the property given to the woman by her parents. The bride price is based on marriage. What the man gives to the woman is the woman's, and the dowry is given to the woman by her parents, so the ownership of the dowry belongs to the woman. The bride price belongs to the property of husband and wife, and the dowry belongs to personal property. In case of divorce after marriage, the man can ask for the bride price back, and the dowry is the woman's personal property and cannot be returned.
However, in an ordinary small family, the same property belongs to the small family, which is the earnest expectation of both parents and can be expressed by both sides, so there is little possibility of conflict.
2. The ratio of bride price to dowry should be moderate.
Both families contribute to the small family, and the property given to the husband and wife of both small families is roughly the same, or the bride price is more than the dowry.
Of course, it's wedding money, wedding diamond ring money, San Qian (four gold hardware in some places), honeymoon trip money, and the man's wedding banquet money. There is no reason to let this woman go out. Similarly, the man does not need to pay for the woman's return banquet. If the man pays a down payment to buy a house, the woman pays almost the same money to buy a car or decorate the wedding room. If it is the property of the man before marriage, the woman has no reason to decorate and pay for a car.
There is no need to compare with each other.
In recent years, in some places, it has become a common practice to keep up with the joneses, and the sky-high bride price not only increases the family's economic burden, but also pollutes the social atmosphere and even becomes a restrictive factor for rural development. To break the sky-high bride price, we need to constantly adjust and optimize our thinking and continue to exert our strength for a long time.
The formation of high-priced bride price is due to traditional customs, comparing and showing off, blindly following the trend and other factors.
At the same time, dowry has also been put on the social side. In this case, the bride price is not compared with the bride price, nor with others. What suits you is the best.
To sum up, in addition to the bride price, a suitable dowry is the support and love of the woman's parents. I think so, but it should be suitable.