Accept talent, that is, the man asks the matchmaker to propose marriage to the woman's house. If the woman agrees to propose, and the man formally proposes to her, he must bring the live goose as a gift to make people accept his choice. In the book "In the Soul of Li Yi's Poems", it is said: "When you are unconscious, the geese pick it."
Asking the name is that the man asked the matchmaker to ask the woman's name and eight characters in order to prepare for marriage. "In the Soul of Li Yi's Poetry" records: "What's your name, Bin Zhi Yan?" Most of the names asked are: "If someone orders them, they will be added to divination. Who dares to ask the woman's name? " If the woman agrees, send a gift; Men decide their luck by divination. If the eight characters of men and women match, proceed to the next step.
Najib, that is, telling the woman the good news of divination marriage, also took geese as gifts-later generations mostly took gold and silver jewelry as gifts. Equivalent to the current engagement, commonly known as delivery, over-commitment, engagement.
Sign, that is, the man sends the bride price to the woman's home, also known as paying money, hiring a big one, giving a big gift, etc. In ancient times, birds and animals were used as gifts. In ancient times, the whole deer was used as a bride price, and later generations simply used deerskin. Cui Jian's "Wedding Text" records: "Tell the bird to drink the goose with deerskin." The Book of Songs, Zhao Nan, said: "There are dead elk in the wild, and white grass covers them. There is a woman who loves spring, and Ji's family lures her. " It's about proposing to a girl with wild deer. Because in ancient times, hiring more geese was a betrothal gift, so the betrothal gift was also called "supporting birds". Of course, not all birds and animals were used as gifts in ancient conscription, as in "Self-protection Feng Wei", "Self-protection flies, silks wear clothes." When bandits come to trade silk, they come to me, which is an example of using cloth as a dowry Later, the collection of gifts became more and more complicated and became one of the most complicated processes in the Six Gifts.
Invitation day, that is, after the man chooses the wedding date, he goes to the woman's house to prepare gifts and ask for marriage permission. Now people commonly call it "raising the sun" and "sending the sun".
Kiss is to marry the bride. Their manners and manners are different, but most men go to the woman's house to greet their relatives. After returning to the man's house, the bride and groom eat in a tripod, and then cut a gourd in half. Husband and wife hold each other's drinks, which is called "marriage"-this is the origin of the toast of later generations. This process is one of the most colorful events in marriage custom culture.
In ancient times, the marriage of rich children generally strictly followed the steps of six rites, while the marriage of ordinary families was mostly simple. Qilu is an ancient civilization and a state of etiquette, but it is not limited to the Six Rites. Shandong Linqu is still like this, and it has long been ridiculed by wind poems. "The Book of Songs Qi Feng Zhu" cloud:
As soon as I am attached to it, I turn a deaf ear to it, and I will still be attached to it.
As soon as I went to court, I turned a deaf ear to green, so I showed it to Joan Ying.
As long as I am in the hall, I will turn my ears yellow, and I will still be with Joan Ying.
The so-called "writing" in the poem refers to the open space between the gate and the screen; Court refers to the place inside the door and in front of the hall; The lobby is the lobby in front of the room. When getting married, men only wait in these three places, which just shows the marriage custom of not welcoming each other.
The wedding of later generations generally followed the flow of the ancient six rites, but it was different. However, no matter how different customs are, there is generally a unified step: first, betrothal, third, wedding ceremony, and 40% marriage-there will be a fifth step in individual marriages, that is betrothal.