It depends on your communication with your husband's family. First of all, both parents should determine the relationship. The woman and others should prepare a set of clothes, shoes and hats for the man and his parents. The family members of the woman's family will go to the man's house, and the man will give her a considerable meeting fee, which is also commonly known as a gift, ranging from 1000 to tens of thousands according to the man's economic ability. All relatives of the man's family should give money or gifts to the girls they meet. The relatives of the woman don't need to prepare gifts and meeting fees for the man, but the parents of the woman should give the man a certain gift, which is less than the gift given by the man. The man reserves equipment (three gold or hardware) for the woman, and then sets a time to inform relatives (elders) of their relationship with the hotel. After this meal, you can discuss marriage at another time. If the man is from Yixing, it will be easy. If not, it will usually be done by the woman. If you get married, let the matchmaker (if you don't find a friend to be a ready-made matchmaker) discuss the bride price, wedding car and the number of guests on both sides.