Are you officially married or not coming back?
If both parties are not married or divorced soon after giving the bride price, can I still ask for the return of the bride price? Is it a full return or a partial return?
Let's listen to the hard-core argument of Legalists, which involves disputes over bride price or engagement. There are some principles here, which also involve the court's discretion. So-it is very important to give a good certificate, be reasonable and find the right lawyer.
I. Typical cases
Wang Xiaomei and Liu Xiaogang were introduced to each other, and they liked each other. In addition, when they reach the age of marriage, their parents keep urging them to register for marriage within six months.
Xiao Gang gave Xiaomei a wedding gift of 99,999 yuan, thinking of winning a "one in a million" lottery ticket. However, I didn't expect Xiaomei to suddenly leave Xiaogang's house less than a year after she got married, and then sued for divorce, saying that they couldn't go on.
The woman asked for a divorce, and her attitude was firm. Xiaogang was puzzled, but she thought that since we couldn't get together, let's go. Fortunately, there are no children yet. However, Xiaomei is required to return the bride price in full and bear the "face money" and other expenses of the wedding ceremony. Xiaomei thinks that everyone is married, how can she return the bride price? She won't give it back to me. There is no dispute, we can only wait for the court to decide.
After trial by the court, it was decided that the two divorced, and the plaintiff returned part of the bride price to the defendant, which did not support the defendant's request for the plaintiff to bear the expenses such as "face money".
None of the original defendants appealed.
Second, the core arguments of France and Canada.
Bride price, also called bride price and lottery in some places, has been a marriage custom in China for thousands of years. According to this custom, if a man wants to marry a wife, he must pay a bride price or a bride price to her home.
The amount of bride price depends on local conditions, the economic situation of the parties and other factors. Although this custom can be the guarantee of marriage to a certain extent, in real life, the bride price does not mean that both parties will definitely step into marriage. Even if they get married, it happens from time to time that both parties dissolve their marriage in a short time. Therefore, disputes about bride price or engagement account for a large proportion in marriage and family disputes.
No matter who gives the bride price (mostly the man) or who receives the bride price (mostly the woman), there will be doubts-after the bride price is given, if the two parties are not married (some live together, some don't even live together), or divorced later (some divorced for a short time, some left after a year or two), as the giver of the bride price, whether they have the right to demand the return of the bride price. Is it a full return or a partial return?
The first clear question is, what is a bride price?
Should all gifts from men and women in love be returned? What does the bride price include? The core of the bride price is the property that one party and his family conditionally give to the other party and his family for the purpose of concluding marriage. It is strictly targeted and must be based on local customs and habits. In the end, marriage needs to pay a price. It has obvious customs. Paying property for the purpose of concluding a marriage relationship shall be recognized as a bride price. For example, according to local customs, one party pays the other party's property through intermediaries such as matchmakers, which is generally a bride price; Paying a diamond ring is generally considered to have the purpose of concluding a marriage and also belongs to the category of bride price. Whether there is a purpose of entering into marriage should be analyzed and judged in combination with the actual situation at the time of payment. Generally speaking, whether the two sides are in the state of talking about marriage can be reflected by the chat records of communication tools such as SMS and WeChat, but the simple confession of love words cannot reflect whether the two sides are in the state of talking about marriage. If the chat records such as SMS and WeChat are lost and cannot be recovered, you can still rely on the marriage recording of the conversation between the two parties at that time, and the recording of the relationship between the two parties can also come in handy in the future. However, the gift money between lovers, the necessary expenses in communication between the two sides, and the expenses for entertaining relatives and friends do not belong to the category of bride price. For example, because of the cost of entertaining relatives and friends at an engagement or wedding; Wedding photography expenditure; Booking related expenses of wedding companies and hotels; Small gifts to express feelings given to each other in love are not within the scope of bride price. In short, the determination of bride price needs to consider the local customs, whether it is for the purpose of concluding marriage, the time of communication between the two sides, the distance between relatives and friends and so on.
Secondly, whether the bride price should be returned in whole or in part generally depends on whether both men and women have gone through the marriage registration procedures.
Those who have not registered for marriage will generally return the bride price, except in two cases. One is that the longer the two parties live together, the less the bride price should be returned. Because from the social common sense, the purpose of giving bride price is to enable both parties to conclude a legal marriage relationship, and the ultimate goal is that both parties should live together for a long time. If the two parties have lived together in the name of husband and wife, or even given birth to children, but they have not gone through the marriage registration formalities, at this time, the bride price can be returned without refund or a small amount. And generally speaking, after living together for a long time, most of the bride price accepted by the woman has been transformed into the property of both parties or has been used for living together. It is unfair and impractical to return the bride price in full at this time. The determination of the standard of "* * * living together" requires both men and women to achieve a stable living condition, and what kind of living condition is stable needs to be judged in specific circumstances. If you only live together temporarily once in a while, it may be considered by the court as not constituting a stable living state, and then the bride price recipient will be sentenced to return the bride price according to the custom.
The other is whether the giver and the receiver are at fault. If the recipient of the bride price is at fault, such as the woman hiding an illness that is not suitable for marriage, the man can ask for a full refund; If the bride price giver is at fault, such as the man cheating, the bride price receiver can reduce or not return the bride price; If both parties are at fault, when determining the amount of bride price to be returned, we can compare the magnitude of their faults. If one party's fault is obviously greater than the other party's, the refund amount can be appropriately increased or decreased.
Should the bride price be returned for marriage registration and divorce? Whether to return the bride price before marriage after divorce is a common problem in current marriage disputes. Many people think that the bride price is paid for marriage, and they should come back after divorce. Actually, this is a misunderstanding. Because since both parties have gone through the marriage registration formalities, it means that their marriage relationship has been recognized and protected by law. The marriage goal pursued by the man who paid the bride price has also been realized. Therefore, in principle, the bride price should not be returned. There are only two exceptions to getting the bride price back after divorce. One is that the bride price should be returned in most or even all cases if the two parties have gone through the marriage registration procedures but lack understanding before marriage, or because of differences in personality, concepts and living habits. Because the man who pays the bride price pays more attention to establishing a family and living together than marriage registration. After the marriage registration, both parties have legally formed a legal relationship between husband and wife. However, if you have never lived together or have lived together for a short time, there will be no experience of mutual help and support between husband and wife. For both parties, although the marriage relationship in the legal sense has been established, the real life in the substantive sense of * * * is far from beginning. In some places, in order to cheat each other's money, some people use marriage as bait and ask each other to pay a large bride price, but after registration, they don't live with each other or leave. This kind of cheating behavior aimed at possessing the other party's property has also greatly damaged the legitimate rights and interests of the bride price payer. Therefore, in judicial practice, the court will determine the amount of return according to the amount of bride price, the length of marriage, whether there are legitimate reasons for not living together and the customs and habits of the local countryside.
The other is to pay before marriage, which makes it difficult for the payer. Life is hard, with absolute and relative difficulties. The so-called absolute difficulties are real difficulties, but their lives can no longer rely on their own strength to maintain the most basic living standards in the local area. The so-called relative difficulty can be that compared with before the bride price payment, the difference before and after the payment is quite wide, and it becomes more difficult than the original living conditions. The difficulty of life here means "absolute difficulty". Because the two parties have concluded a marriage relationship and the purpose of paying the bride price has been realized, in principle, the other party does not need to return the bride price. If the difficulties in life are taken as a reference factor, it shows that the law has helped the party with difficulties in life, which undoubtedly sets a higher standard for the party who accepts the bride price. Therefore, we should adopt objective standards and make unified judgments, and we should not let the bride price recipients make unlimited concessions. Therefore, this kind of life difficulty caused by payment must be absolute rather than relative. In judicial practice, the court will comprehensively judge whether it meets the conditions of "living difficulties" according to the evidence such as subsistence allowance certificate, economic income certificate and difficulty certificate issued by the village Committee and the actual situation. In terms of the amount of bride price return, it is not a full return, but will be determined according to the time when both parties live together, whether they have children, economic situation and other factors.
Finally, in a case, will the court support the return of the bride price? How much to return depends on a case discussion, because after all, life practice is very different.
There are the basic principles of law, customs and human feelings, and the court's discretion to deal with bride price (engagement) disputes. If you encounter a similar dispute, pick up the phone and dial 400- 1055- 153, and contact your family lawyer immediately.
Ask a professional lawyer, what should you do in this situation? Roughly predict the possibility of the case.
French and Canadian families receive cases all over the country, and there are lawyer talk centers all over the country.
The engagement has changed, but the pursuit of a better life has not changed.
Say goodbye to the wrong one and you will meet the right one.
Marriage is beautiful and worth pursuing, protecting and maintaining by all of us. Bride price is just a custom, and it should not be an obstacle to marriage between lovers, nor should it be a fuse for two families to turn against each other. Legalists hope that all lovers will be well, and their lifelong happiness will not be affected by the bride price!
This series # Legalist Hard-core Argument # is hosted by Dr. Wang Wei, Marriage and Family Law, Southwest University of Political Science and Law.