Recently, The Economist posted on a netizen that his parents hoped that he and his sister could buy a house for their younger brother and asked if they wanted to pay.

When the topic came out, it triggered a hot discussion among netizens.

It is found that this phenomenon actually exists in a high proportion in real life.

Especially in children's adulthood, children's housing, parents' pension and other issues.

Netizens also mentioned that they and their relatives and friends often encounter unequal treatment.

Netizens gave different views on whether the elder sister should buy a house for her younger brother.

Except for a few netizens who recognize money, some netizens think that they can't afford it. Some netizens suggest that they can lend money to their younger brothers to buy a house, and some netizens think that they can give more according to their own abilities.

What would you do if this happened to you? (The following views are only personal views of netizens who are talking about the housing market, not platform views. )

My parents think my brother is getting married and buying a house.

I asked my sister for money.

How can you argue with him if you don't borrow money?

The content of the main post is from @ Chen Jingjing 123:

I chatted with my sister today, and my sister said that my father called her to chat.

After a few words, I began to talk about my brother's marriage and love. My brother is 27 years old and hasn't talked about anyone. This is a cliche. Our sisters don't know how to help pay attention to or care about anything.

He also said that my family is going to buy a house for my brother in Wuhan, and my sister and I will help out. My sister didn't say anything at the time. My sister told me that I really wanted to say that my two daughters didn't receive enough bride price. But I was worried that my father heard that his blood pressure was going to be high again, so I didn't tell him.

My sister and I are married to a very ordinary family. We have only been married for a few years and the mortgage is still being paid. There is really no extra money to help my brother buy a house in Wuhan.

I used to talk back to my dad, telling him that they were all born to the same mother. Why should I buy him a house? My dad always said that you were my sister and it was right to help my brother. He also said that I was selfish and had no feelings at all.

Every time I want to say that he was not born to me, I will help if I have the ability, but this is my obligation, and I really can't accept it.

My dad used to cry because of this problem, but now I really don't want to care about it.

Netizen: Help my brother and nephew.

In a "son preference" family, the daughter has no money.

As soon as the topic came out, I didn't expect to cause a lot of netizens to swear. Many netizens told their own experiences and stories of friends and relatives around them.

I found that this kind of family relationship of "relying on daughters to raise sons" is really quite a lot; Of course, there are also some different families who help their sisters;

What is even more rare is that there are families who have been educated fairly since childhood, brothers who have settled accounts clearly, and parents who do not interfere in their children's affairs.

1, after helping my brothers and nephews, did my daughter have no money in a "son preference" family?

@ Click on that point:

There is really no way to have such parents. It seems that my cousin's family is similar to yours. The younger brothers and uncles of the two sisters are young, and the children are left to the elderly. When the child is older, the two sisters start to make money, and he will give money when he comes back to farm.

Every year when I farm at home, I find two married daughters to force me to make money. Some people grow watermelons to make money, while others grow broccoli to make money. He lost money. There are a lot of reasons to ask others, and he is right to be unreasonable. The elder married in Hakka County, Guangdong Province, and the younger married in his hometown, all because such a father is not car-scrapping at home.

Elder sister also dare not disobey him, for fear of his mother's stroke.

@08 happy bride:

It's no use helping, because they asked for it.

Is that they think you should, I will never help my little brother again in my life, just help an enemy.

I don't give hundreds of thousands, and I go around saying that you didn't help him. My parents still think you haven't paid enough. He is your brother. Shouldn't you help him when making money? Helping outsiders every day means that my husband is an outsider and has nothing to say.

A patriarchal family has no head.

@ 丫丫丫丫丫:

My friend's brother started a business, and her parents asked her to support him. She hasn't bought a house, has no children, and is still unemployed. I really advise her to take care of herself.

But in fact, the feelings between brothers and sisters, even if they are not deep, are hard to ignore.

Later, she borrowed tens of thousands of dollars and had little savings. I don't know when she paid back tens of thousands of dollars. Family, in fact, the snow in front of the door is really difficult to sweep.

@ Small Toys:

My father has been stressing that he needs his daughter to take care of him when he is ill, and so does my nephew and niece.

He said his daughter-in-law had no obligation to take care of him.

In his eyes, the daughter-in-law should be treated well when she comes home, and the daughter has already rolled up her sleeves to work when she comes home. Otherwise, he thinks it's a loss to adopt his daughter

I'm afraid to go back to my hometown now. My family in Shenzhen is tired. Going back to work without breathing is really unbearable!

@ Taobao Shopping 3:

Nephews always borrow money from their aunts when they get married.

Last year, my wife's nephew was getting married in his hometown. My father-in-law, who is nearly eighty years old, called several times to cry for his grandson, and the bride price was 300 thousand.

I don't think I can get off the ground without borrowing 50 thousand yuan. Besides, according to your previous experience in borrowing money, if you lend it, you will either pay it back in the foreseeable future or never return it.

We are working class ourselves. Finally, my wife said that my conscience had a red envelope of 5 thousand yuan, and that was it. After that, her family didn't even have a phone, which was too few.

My nephew just graduated from college and is only in his early twenties. If he wants to get married and has no money, he can only borrow it from his aunt.

Father-in-law and mother-in-law are nearly 80 years old, and their property has long been distributed to their two sons. If something goes wrong, the daughter should also share it.

Parents should educate their families to be considerate and support each other, instead of helping each other without a bottom line.

@ 圛圛:

In Hubei, my mother taught our brothers to settle accounts since childhood ... We must rely on ourselves, and we can't reach out to others except our parents.

My husband's family is also educated in this way. Although our sister-in-law lent her hundreds of thousands of dollars to buy a house, it was made clear that it was a loan, not a gift, and her in-laws agreed. No matter how long it takes, it will always be paid back.

@HONGYU84:

My brother built a house in his hometown. I should have paid 40 thousand, and my sister took 30 thousand

My mother told him that if you want to pay back the money of the two sisters, it is estimated that he is not prepared to pay it himself.

I'm not going to let him return it either. I wish I could give it back to my sister. It's hard for her, too.

My brother has no money to build this house. He almost borrowed it. He is heavily in debt, and my sister-in-law doesn't want to do anything every day, so she plays mahjong at home and eats and drinks. Alas, she often laments the wonderful life with my sister.

Besides helping brothers, there are also many brothers who help sisters.

@ Red Apple2015:

Other people's sisters help their younger brothers. Why does our brother always help our sister? ...

After being married to him for so many years, we helped his two sisters unconditionally. My mother-in-law can't wait to share our money equally with her two daughters. ....

@glwh:

Our family asked for help to my sister. My sister-in-law married from my family when she got married, but she thinks I'm a little nice and always finds fault at home whenever she has the chance.

Her husband is a gambler, and now my mother-in-law wants us to buy a house for her baby daughter in the city, but I refused.

Should a daughter buy a house for her brother?

Netizens have a heated discussion about the questions raised by the landlord.

Except for some netizens who think it is related to family culture, parents want to rely on their sons to support the elderly, and their daughters should help. Many netizens think it should not be.

There are many reasons, many people think that they can lend money to their brothers; There are also many netizens who have put forward a more accommodating approach, thinking that brothers can give some money appropriately when buying a house.

It will not destroy family ties, nor will it cause too much economic pressure on itself.

1, time to go out! Related to family culture, parents will rely on their sons to provide for the elderly in the future.

@ Zhenbi 123:

I don't know. How much help does your father need? What is your own mortgage? You're not your own?

Well, you can also repay the kindness of raising. Now that your dad has spoken, why don't you help? So you're helping your husband?

From what the old man said, it is true that you are selfish. Although it is to defend the son, who needs the son to inherit the blood? Why not give the child your last name?

If you don't want to help, don't help, Lahei, and you will be at ease.

If you want to protect your family, but you won't tolerate the idea of your parents helping your brother, you won't be so easy to think. Your parents will definitely rely more on your brother in the future. If they don't protect him, don't expect you to support the elderly.

It is estimated that the old man did not expect his daughter to support the old man in the future. The water poured out by the married woman has been kept for 10 years, so it is wrong to take back some bribes and let him be better to himself in the future.

Although I don't have a sister or anything, I think it's ok to stand from the perspective of the elderly. It's just a matter of helping more and helping less, so the landlord has refused to say how much.

I don't think it's a problem to help tens of thousands of dollars. If you refuse tens of thousands of dollars, this daughter will be raised for nothing and will not understand her parents' thoughts.

@ Wind Innocent 246 1:

It is related to family culture. I'm going to reserve a down payment for my brother-in-law to buy a house.

I think this is normal and I need to do it. I buy a house, and my parents, brothers and sisters, grandparents, grandparents also pay for it.

My sister and I are married to a very ordinary family. We have only been married for a few years and the mortgage is still being paid. This condition is similar to a family of 65438+ million.

2. Don't go out! This will only "waste" my younger brother, and buying a house, getting married and raising children will only be endless.

@money02 19:

Don't pay if you don't want to, just push it back.

If you give, if your husband has an idea, your own marriage will be in crisis. If you don't like it, push it back. Pay attention to the way.

@ Yan MM:

Is our girl's money blown by the wind?

Life in the workplace is very hard, and I have to do housework and take care of my children after work. If I have money, why don't I go to the beauty salon and have a cup of milk tea to relax, or I don't want to enroll my children in a cram school to avoid getting old.

If it were me, I wouldn't give him a penny, and I would scold him.

At his age, he is the pillar of the family. He should be filial to his parents and live up to their expectations. He also worries his parents and sisters who are far away from home, and has to pay for the wandering sisters. It is his sister's responsibility not to wake him up.

There used to be a certain degree of preference for boys, but the investment in education was not high. The worst thing is to deduct the bride price. I don't know who will continue to squeeze my daughter after she gets married. If you can't squeeze her, you will be kidnapped morally, and the donkey of the production team is useless.

@ Andy Mommy Vivian:

Do you think your parents want to have your sister? They just want to have a son

Take care of yourself first and refuse everything except the support of your parents. My brother is married, my brother has children, and my nephew has to go to school. ...

Do you think it won't happen again? The money is in your pocket. Can they rob it? You take the money hard, and you get disconnected.

3, you can borrow money, but you can't give it! Don't be a "brother helper"

@lby 123456:

Equality between men and women. I don't share my property with him. I did a good job.

In the future, when my parents are old, we three brothers and sisters will take care of you and give money together. When a younger brother buys a house, he can lend it to him, write an iou and give him money, which will hurt him and make him feel that he has got something for nothing.

@ 圛圛:

Do you have the obligation to raise your brother? Now I am helping to buy a house, and later I am helping to get married and help my brother raise children?

The landlord's adoptive parents should, and raising a younger brother is neither a responsibility nor an obligation. As for helping my younger brother, it should be borrowing money, not parents asking their daughters to give money directly to their sons.

My brother borrowed money to pay it back. The landlord has the ability to lend money to his brother to buy a house to tide over the difficulties within his ability, instead of raising a waste. Don't be a helper

@lby 123456:

Even the law is afraid to write about the water spilled by married daughters. Being a daughter will definitely make adoptive parents old.

Of course parents will take care of them when they are old. Parents raise their daughters, and daughters have the obligation to take care of them. Parents also raise their sons, and sons also have the obligation to take care of their parents.

But the relationship between a son and a daughter, even if the elder sister has money, the elder sister should not give money to the younger brother.

Lending money only to my brother will make him get into the habit of getting something for nothing, and also make him feel irresponsible and feel that everything should be done by his sister.

4, how much to give some meaning! Family ties can be maintained without affecting family members.

@xuxu898: If I help, I will definitely help, depending on how much I help! If you can't get 1 80,000, you can get more than110,000.

@ikissmoon: Help, brother, how can you not help? 35 thousand is also a help, 8. 1 100 million is fine, and I didn't say how much you should pay.

@ Ordinary Jason: Your dad said he wanted you to pay, but he didn't say how much he wanted you to pay, tens of thousands or even tens of thousands.

@ Letao Aiyue Tao: Tell the elderly to help as much as possible, but we are not a rich or expensive family. We have to live, we have a mortgage to pay, and we have children to raise. If there are more, we can get together.

Parents should not shirk their responsibilities.

Throw the pot to your child.

In fact, this problem is thrown out, and netizens also said that it is really difficult to solve.

If you give money, I am afraid that you will raise a "loser" brother, and your small family is not easy to stabilize; No, some netizens said, I'm afraid it's not good to go back to my parents' house.

Some netizens think that parents should not put the blame on their daughters and make it difficult for their children.

1, paying money, afraid of raising "loser" brothers, small families will be affected.

@PP Song LL: The sons raised by this family are basically waste wood.

@ Free Future:

According to my experience:

1. This kind of son adopted by parents must be abandoned, and they have no ability to corrupt their sisters; The more his sister helps him, the less he can be independent.

Because my son has been raised by ignorant parents, he is definitely unreliable when he is old, and his contribution depends on his daughter.

This is the case with the father of a friend of mine. When he died, he relied on his two daughters to find a doctor to pay for all kinds of medical expenses. His younger brother had no money and did not contribute.

In addition, my sisters have been helping to repay various credit loans. What can he do? After the successful moral kidnapping of relatives, the younger brother could not stand on his own feet, and the sisters gradually left resentment towards their parents.

@1111plus:

I also think that the weirder parents are, the easier it is for children to be spoiled. My mother-in-law doesn't want the other two sons to pay anything involving money.

To accompany her to other places to see a doctor, I need to accompany her, even if I don't have time, because my eldest son has to pay, so I have to arrange everything to accompany her.

It's not once or twice. Even if I take care of the children, my other two sons will not give up their hard work without working or gambling at home.

2. No, I'm afraid my family is poor.

@ To:

Don't answer if you have no money, but you can't go home in the future.

My wife and cousin borrowed money repeatedly, but the money didn't come back for no reason. Refuse a distant relative to borrow money;

Now she has been labeled as ungrateful by her neighbors and relatives, and exists like a demon. No one cares when she goes back, and a pro-WeChat group doesn't pull her in.

If my brother doesn't borrow money, will the consequences be more serious? Just don't care at all. The sooner you see the reality, the sooner you wake up. It's hard to confuse clean.

Parents should not pass the buck and leave the "pot" to their children.

@ Love my son most:

Brothers and sisters are brothers and sisters. If you are capable, you can help each other. If you have no ability, you can help each other.

Your father can raise children and live within his means, but if he can't, don't pretend to be fat. Beat his daughter and pretend to be fat. Is it interesting?

@ Mulan Baby:

It is not easy for the landlord himself. It is not easy to do this. Take one or two million less and don't take it! My husband has a problem with getting more than180 thousand.

It is said that if a family has a daughter and then wants a son, it is basically helping the elder brother and the younger brother. Parents have something to do, and the daughter is the main force to get money. This is for brothers and sisters to help each other, and this is for their own pension in the future.

Such parents never want to give their children any support! It is really not feasible to raise children now, and it is not like before!

Responsible to say that top students also want money! I have to prepare a house for you in the future! Parents should think for their children, not rely on them to provide for their old age.

At most, I just want to make more money myself, and don't give my children any trouble financially. In short, I want to cultivate children and help them in the future.

@ 丫丫丫丫丫丫丫:

As a woman, don't value affection and filial love so much. Most of our parents' feelings are only for their sons. As soon as they were born, they were entitled to inherit most of the family resources, and their daughter was naked and on her own.

Don't think that the kindness of parenting can make excuses for all the "eat woman" behaviors. I was born with the responsibility to support you. Your life has been like a day for decades. Don't wronged yourself, take the initiative to take responsibility.

Buying a house for my brother doesn't mean that my daughter doesn't need to support the elderly in the future.

@ Love my son most:

According to the old man in the hospital, after the Spring Festival, my daughter stayed in the hospital to wait on and take care of her old father and returned to the hospital after May Day. The doctor said it was nothing serious. Let him go home. He said he wouldn't go home and move on.

I said that you have been in hospital for several months. What about the girl's work and children? The old man said loudly, "She is married, not my home."

I can't believe my ears. She is married, so she is not your daughter, so you don't have to sympathize with her?

Secretly told the doctor that the doctor said that the bed was tight and he was not allowed to stay in bed, so he coaxed the old man home.

@sixu2 12:

After reading the comments, it seems that there are many demons helping my younger brother, regardless of gender.

You always remember. So is the child. They are all descendants of old people. They all live by their own abilities. Why do they want to help?

Many old people think that their daughters are cheated once and for all. When they are old, they will say that everyone will support the elderly together. Daughters are not for sale, but also human beings.

I come from northern Hubei and know the situation there.

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