Marriage is the main way for human beings to thrive and is the basis for the formation of family and blood relationship, and the wedding custom is the symbol of the development of human civilization. Humans have gone through a long time from the chaotic state of group marriage to consanguineous marriage of the same family, to marriage outside the family, and finally to monogamy.
Marriage customs symbolize sour, sweet, bitter and spicy jiaozi.
Where there is marriage, there is a wedding. Wedding is one of the most solemn ceremonies in life. There are roughly six stages in ancient weddings, namely, six ceremonies, namely: winning the lottery, asking for names, Naji, accepting the levy, inviting guests and welcoming relatives. Together with the combination of letters of appointment, gifts and wedding reception, they are collectively called "three books and six gifts". The form of wedding is different in the process of handling due to many reasons such as region and custom, but it is generally carried out under the framework of "three books and six rituals".
Wedding customs in northern Shanxi or Shanxi Province are basically the same. Due to the influence of economic situation, regional culture and customs, the details are different. It can be said that "Shili customs are different."
Here is a brief introduction to some wedding customs in northern Shanxi:
Marriage proposal custom
Propose marriage
In ancient times, the relative's name was Nacai. The man asked the matchmaker to send a bride price to the woman's house and propose marriage to her house. If the woman's parents agree to propose, the man will formally propose. The bride price given by the man is usually a wild goose, and it must be alive, because people think that wild geese are migratory birds, flying south in autumn and returning north in spring, coming and going on time, never breaking their word, symbolizing the loyalty of both men and women. Besides geese, there are many kinds of gifts for accepting talents. For example, there are as many as 30 kinds in the Han Dynasty, all of which are homophonic or moral to express good wishes for marriage.
be engaged in
Engagement was called "Zheng Na" in ancient times. In the past, the engagement was changed to Cambodia. Both men and women "propose", "betrothed" and "eight-character marriage" before "inviting". On the day of engagement, the woman went to the man's house accompanied by her parents or sister-in-law. The man will hold a banquet and warmly entertain his in-laws and matchmakers. During the dinner, the matchmaker should introduce the popularity, family status, bride price and so on. Communicate in an orderly way, so that both sides can understand each other and consider each other easily. On this day, the man's parents will ask the matchmaker to send his in-laws a "bride price" to show their marriage. At the same time, the man's parents and other elders should give the woman "meeting money." The amount of "meeting money" varies, mainly indicating the sincerity and congratulations of the man's family.
The bride got out of the sedan chair.
After the engagement, a woman's clothes are provided by the man at the right time, and the future daughter-in-law is invited to live at home (but not for men) on holidays and singing operas. On the eve of the wedding celebration, the man will give the woman's in-laws generous gifts. The bride price is proposed by the man, and the wedding matters are settled, and the matchmaker will come forward to handle or run errands. If there is an unexpected dispute in the middle, the matchmaker will handle it and mediate.
In the past, the engagement of the older generation was decided by the matchmaker and the head of the family. Before the engagement, the matchmaker wrote a "wedding note". The "marriage table" is to write the zodiac signs and birth dates of men and women on hemp paper in duplicate. Only after the in-laws of both parties hold one copy can they be considered engaged. Writing a "marriage list" is like marrying a door. In the future, if one party wants to dissolve the engagement, it will be restricted by the "marriage list". Without the "marriage list", it is impossible to dissolve the engagement. In ancient times, young people were deprived of the privilege of "blind date". Even if it is a "blind date", it is only the woman who covers her face. In the boudoir, the man reached out and touched the woman's little feet to infer her appearance and gentleness.
Meet relatives
Meeting relatives was called "invitation" in ancient times. After the man sets the wedding date, the matchmaker and parents take mutton and steamed bread to the woman's house to negotiate and get her back, commonly known as "meeting relatives" or "choosing a date"
Marriage is usually held more than one month before the wedding, and some families go to the wedding several months in advance, so that both parties have enough time to prepare for the wedding. After the wedding, the woman rushed to buy a dowry, and the man invited relatives and friends to organize a wedding reception.
After both parties agree, they should write the wedding date and time on red paper, which is called a "gift card".
Wedding custom
In ancient times, it was called "pro-welcoming". Marriage is a business banquet and a wedding ceremony.
Marriage mode
In ancient times, weddings in northern Shanxi usually took sedan chairs, but there were mules in the mountains. A mule carries a sedan chair, which is a happy sedan chair carried by a mule. Mule sedan chair has rattan, bamboo and wood. Generally, it is mostly made of wood and consists of a sedan chair body and two long handles. The sedan chair is wrapped in red velvet or red cloth, which is rigorous, rich, luxurious and dazzling. A mule carrying a sedan chair should be carried by two fat and strong mules with tassels on his head and bells hanging around his neck. Drivers are called "mule passengers", both of which are "handles" for driving animals, specializing in driving, lifting and dropping cars. In the past, ordinary families could not afford sedan chairs and mules, but only wealthy families liked sedan chairs and mules. However, no matter how rich or poor, you have to use mules to carry the sedan chair when you get married. People who don't have cars and mules can rent cars and mules and hire mules. The number of sedan chairs depends on individual circumstances. Usually a sedan chair.
On the wedding day, the "mule driver" will drive a mule-carried sedan chair to meet his master. The master will write down the items that Mr. Zhu must avoid on red paper and stick them next to the sedan chair door, and hang 2 feet of red cloth on the sedan chair door to let the "mule driver" get off the sedan chair and set out to marry the bride with married men, women and drummers. When you get to the woman's house, you can have tea and put the bride in a sedan chair. After the bridesmaid sits in front of the bride, she can get off the sedan chair and return. The groom and the best man either ride a donkey or ride a horse or walk behind a sedan chair. Along the way, people happily rushed mules, drums and cars, and the scene was spectacular. After taking back the bride, the "mule driver" first stopped to hold up the sedan chair, and then the bride got off the sedan chair and poured the red carpet and other wedding ceremonies.
Tea is carefully prepared by the bride's family.
In other remote mountainous rural areas, people have the custom of driving donkeys to marry. On the wedding day, the man's family drove two tame grass donkeys to the woman's house to get married. Before leaving, the donkey wore tassels and red cloth on his head, and the saddle was covered with a red silk quilt, which was a kind of "style" to welcome the bride. When the journey is far away, you should start the night before, travel all the way at night, whip the donkey, and arrive at the woman's house after dawn. When the wedding procession enters the intersection of Nvfangjiacun, it is necessary to fire a gun, indicating that the wedding ceremony has arrived at the door on an auspicious day of the ecliptic. As soon as people in the village heard the gunshots, they would come one after another and follow their parents to watch the lively wedding scene. The silent village was boiling. After washing and dressing, the bride should put on red clothes, red coat, red pants and red shoes. The bride's family should prepare snacks, fruits, sweets, brown sugar water and other "tea delivery" to entertain the wedding personnel. At the same time, it is necessary to designate someone to feed the donkey. After eating "tea", I will pick up the bride. The bride will be carried out by her brother, put on the donkey's back and go to the groom's house with the wedding team. The woman's family should also catch some donkeys for men and women to ride away and ride when they come home the next day. The wedding team returned to the groom's house and welcomed men and women to the wedding. Then her mother-in-law took a little girl with her, and the little girl held a tea tray with a Kobanawa and a box of face powder on it. Before the wedding car, the mother-in-law pinned the floret on the bride's ear hair, then rubbed powder on her new wife's face and fed some brown sugar or fruit candy to her mouth. This activity is called "Tian Yuan", which means to establish a harmonious and filial relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and wish the bride a sweet life in the future. Then there will be wedding ceremonies such as the red carpet and the worship hall. Due to the inconvenient transportation in the old society, in remote villages, the custom of driving donkeys and marrying daughters-in-law has been passed down from generation to generation. Today, you can still see the wedding procession leading donkeys around the mountainside on the narrow path in the north of Shanxi.
Men decide who to marry, and women decide who to send the bride.
In the northern part of Shanxi, the custom of "sending her to the flower cave" has been circulating since ancient times. Besides, you can't get married. People who have never been married cannot be sent away. Don't marry someone who doesn't belong to the genus (ancient literature has the saying that the first, fifth and ninth days before the year are counted in front of the bid, that is, avoid the genus). Filial piety cannot be married, and pregnant women cannot be married. Married people send their uncles off first, then their wives, and then another row.
Guaqin (open west gate)
The day before the wedding, the northern part of Shanxi was called Guaqin. On this day, I want to invite the drum band to add fun and set off the festival. The songs played include Flowers as Media, Phoenix Seeking Phoenix, Romance of the West Chamber, Yuanyang Playing in the Water, Duige, Ten Couples of Flowers, Hanging a Red Light, Bai Weiling Beauty and other festive music. Guaqin wants to have fun at dinner, which is called "meeting the bride".
Things to do and preparations for the wedding day
1, have breakfast. Generally, it is mutton offal, warm flour mixed with bean sprouts and cold dishes, and fried oil cakes.
2. The base is booming.
3. Send wedding cakes to neighbors.
4. The groom pays homage to his ancestors, sets burning paper in front of his ancestral grave, or invites him to pay homage to his ancestral grave at home.
On this day, before the wedding sedan chair arrives, the bride will eat white-flour pancakes in the morning (after the pancakes are baked, they will only be turned once, and then they will be eaten by themselves). Having your mother or sister comb your hair and pluck the hair out of your face is called "opening your face". After putting on clothes, veil: after putting on shoes, feet don't touch the ground, brother, uncle, brother, etc. Will carry you into the car (sedan chair).
Pick up the bride (in a sedan chair) for the wedding.
The wedding car does not take the repeated route, but meets stone mills (Qinglong), stone mills (white tigers), wells, graves, sewers and so on. On the way, they are all covered with red paper. In case of coffins or mourning clothes, people wearing mourning clothes and women crying behind the corners and roofs should cover the doors and windows of the bride's sedan chair with red cloth or red carpet. In case of another wedding motorcade, Shuangniang was afraid of being happy and asked for a red handkerchief. If one team doesn't stop, the bride will throw the red handkerchief out of the car. When the motorcade arrives at the woman's place, it will hang a red curtain and take it off when it comes back. Through the village. You must come back before eleven o'clock.
Get off direction (parking) and get off taboo.
The direction and door of the wedding car (referring to the car in which the bride rides) should be determined according to the bride's zodiac sign. Generally speaking, tigers, rabbits and dragons should go west. Snakes, horses and sheep should go to the north. Monkeys, chickens and dogs should go to the East. Pigs, mice and cowgirls should go south. Brides should avoid the three zodiac signs when getting on, getting off and getting married. Brides are one, five and nine years old, except this year, that is, dragons, monkeys, rats, women avoid snakes, chickens and cows. Tiger, horse and dog women avoid rabbits, sheep and pigs. Rabbits, pigs and sheep avoid dragons, rats and monkeys. Cows, snakes, tigers, horses and dogs.
The groom led the bride with big red flowers and satin and slowly walked to the flower worship hall in front of the wedding shed.
Welcome new relatives
After the car (sedan chair) stopped, the bride didn't get off for a while, so she had to wait for a while. This is called "stuffy sedan chair" or "holding your temper". Get off the bus first, and the man should arrange a special person to be responsible for the reception, usually brought by the clan, and prepare a stool at the door of the car, so that the farewell personnel can get off on the stool. When entering the door, the male and female wedding staff should give the male and female wedding attendants the position of entry, that is, the left side. Bow to each other, greet each other, say some polite words, and let them sit in the room. After the boys come first, the clerk hangs the red curtain on the threshold, puts the feedback items in the hall (living room), puts the longevity bottle in the kitchen, and puts the fish-walking rabbit on the kang (bed) of the new house.
Add fate and catch happy money.
After men and women go to the man's house to give tea, the bride's mother-in-law takes one, carries a tray, puts a small flower (peach powder and box), some fruits and sweets, as well as broken grains and various denominations. Before getting on the sedan chair (sedan chair), she put flowers on the bride's head, powdered her face and put candy in the bride's mouth, in order to increase the fate. Let the bride catch the coins in the tray, that is, catch the money. The bride can only catch it once, and can't repeat it. Then, put a small board in front of the car and the bride gets off. Crossing the brazier means crossing the saddle.
Inverted red carpet
In Shuozhou and northern Shanxi, there is a red carpet ceremony to marry a wife. According to local custom, when the bride's sedan chair landed in front of the groom's door, two prearranged people held two wool blankets and spread them out in front of the sedan chair. In this way, the bride wearing a red hijab got off the sedan chair and walked on the felt. The two of them switched the felt in tandem until the door of the bridal chamber, forming a "felt road". The groom led the bride with red silk and walked slowly to the flower worship hall in front of the shed. The wedding emcee here threw grain at the couple and sang "Song of Sedan" in a loud voice: "Sedan arrives at the door, four seasons. When the sedan chair lands, the in-laws are more amiable. Turn the mat, lay the carpet, step on the cloth and lay it in front of the shed. "
Celebrate custom
spread
Wanghuo is in Shuozhou area, no matter where there is a celebration, it is indispensable. Wanghuo is made of combustible carbon blocks, square, round, high, low, large and small. Leiwang fire is also a technology, which requires stability, beauty and flammability. There are also many things about the prosperity of marriage. Wanghuo was built by the whole person (that is, the person whose parents are alive), usually the groom's uncle. Put on a fiery red skirt and write the words "Prosperous times to the sky". Light it before the bride gets off. After the bride got off the bus, the groom's edible sesame oil was poured on the fire, full of enthusiasm and thriving. After the bride entered the hospital, the groom walked around Wanghuo three times on his back and went backwards three times. In the meantime, there is a custom of playing enough paper to have more children in rural areas.
Worship the church (heaven and earth)
After the bride is introduced, one of the most important activities is to pay homage to the bride. Generally speaking, it is better to go to church from 9 am to 1 1. Visiting the church is the lead singer, and the couple hold hands and bow down and kowtow every time. Worship the church, commonly known as heaven and earth, is generally three worships, that is, "one worships heaven and earth, the other worships the high hall, and the third worships the husband and wife." Meeting the bride is the stage of the wedding, and the ceremony is very important. In ancient times, only when couples prostrated themselves before the church could there be a formal name of husband and wife. Marriage can only be established after paying homage to the church.
Wedding custom
Into the bridal chamber
The new house-that is, the new house where the newlyweds get married. The bridal chamber has famous and interesting customs. As far as Shuozhou area is concerned, there are two ways to enter the bridal chamber. One is that after the morning ceremony, the bride and groom symbolically enter the bridal chamber. The second is the real wedding room at night after the wedding, which is called "consummation". Before entering the bridal chamber, the bride and groom should stick up their daughter's window and stick up the window they broke one day with paper. Health and gas stove fire, that is, stove fire. Put a mandarin duck pillow, the bride opens the pillow, and the groom puts the buckwheat skin in it. Eat slippery fish and rabbits before going to bed.
Qianxifang
When you marry a daughter-in-law, please ask the drummer class to play to celebrate, which is called "Happy Room". "Huanfang" is a wedding ceremony held in rural Shuozhou. On the first day of the wedding, a drummer class (called drum) will be invited. Tents were set up in the courtyard, tables and chairs were placed, and drummers sat around the table, playing musical instruments all night, blowing and beating, and the sound spread for miles. People in the neighboring village heard the sound of beating people and knew that another family had a wife, so they gathered around to watch the fun.
The next day is a new auspicious day, and the drummer class will greet the bride with a wedding sedan chair and take her back. At the ceremony, the drummer class cheered and cheered, which attracted the whole village to "watch the excitement". On this day, the host's home was crowded with outsiders, and everyone was immersed in laughter and joy. In the middle of the night, the people who made trouble in the bridal chamber left one after another, and the drummer class was still in full swing and kept beating. The bride and groom entered the bridal chamber, took off their coats and embraced each other. The sound of drums and music was accompanied by tenderness, which added infinite interest. Young people in rural areas like to listen to the bridal chamber on other people's wedding night, and there are drummers who "scrape the bridal chamber", so the bride and groom don't have to worry about revealing the "secret" of the bridal chamber.
It is said that this custom was left by Wu Zetian. Later generations took it as an example and gradually evolved into the later "Blowing Music Room".
Fishing for grandchildren
The custom of "fishing for grandchildren" in the bridal chamber has many implications. This custom, which has been passed down to this day, is simple and lively, full of strong local flavor and human touch, and expresses the wish of newly-married farmers to import more people, have more children and be happy.
On the wedding night, there are many troubles in the bridal chamber, but it is a beautiful scene to have grandchildren. The bride's mother-in-law was "embarrassed" by the younger generation such as her brother-in-law, dressed as a clown and won the grandson ceremony.
I saw everyone around my mother-in-law, forcibly painting her cheeks black at the bottom of the pot, painting a moustache, decorating red and black eyes, hanging red peppers on her ears, hanging bells around her neck, rummaging through leather clothes and holding a wicker fence. It was very funny. Then, the mother-in-law rode on a stool in Xiao Mu, and all the cooks rushed to the door of the wedding room carrying the stool. When the groom is carried back to the bridal chamber, he should sit at the "fire mouth" of the kang and not go to the ground. He can only go to the fields when he is fishing for his grandson.
Red velvet or red cloth package, rigorous, rich and luxurious, bright and dazzling wedding sedan chair.
Mother-in-law was carried to the door of the wedding room by everyone and shouted softly and cheerfully, "bride, bride, open the door." The bride asked through the door, "What are you doing?" Mother-in-law replied: "Fishing for grandchildren." The voice just fell and the bride opened the door. After the mother-in-law entered the door, she quickly put the filter into the water tank and symbolically turned it up and down to pick it up. The younger generation grabbed a handful of bean sprouts (symbolizing rooting and standing) and threw them into the colander. Mother-in-law raised the colander and looked at the fat bean sprouts in vain, as if she saw her little grandson alive and kicking in the future, and suddenly her eyes brightened. The bride asked shyly, "Did you catch it?" "I caught it." Mother-in-law answered happily. "Catch what?" The bride asked again.
The mother-in-law replied with a big smile: "Five men, two women and seven children are reunited, all for nothing, eating jiaozi with grandma." Ask and answer questions and cooperate with each other. At this time, the bridal chamber was beaming and memorable.
After the sun fishing ceremony, the mother-in-law will lay a kang for the bride and groom. While paving the road, I chanted: "Pave the kang, pave the kang, there are more husbands and fewer girls." Put some sweets, dates, peanuts, copper coins and other auspicious items in the four corners of the new quilt, which means that the husband and wife are sweet and loving, have a baby early and be happy.
Finally, the bride and groom reluctantly repeated "the ebony table with elm legs, we will sleep when you leave" in the laughter of everyone. In a burst of laughter, people left wholeheartedly, and the bride and groom could hug each other and sleep.
Other customs
Go back to relatives
Returning to relatives is also called "returning to the door". The next morning, the woman's family arranged a vehicle to pick up the couple and send them back to their home. The arrangement of the wedding banquet at noon is basically the same as the day before, except that the groom (new uncle) sits on his head. There is a local saying that "new uncle sits in front". Dinner is usually steamed stuffed bun, jiaozi, rolled bean noodles, and the dishes are bean sprouts and vermicelli, and the Beatles braised dishes. In order to make fun of the groom, my sister-in-law and brother-in-law wrapped jiaozi in Chili noodles, pepper noodles and salt. So that the groom can make a fool of himself. But before the clever groom came, he had been taught by his elders and had common sense in this field, so he was extra careful when eating. In the woman's home, the groom is also full of tricks, which not only increases the fun of teasing, but also tests the groom's intelligence. After lunch, the bride and groom return to the man's house. In some places, they stayed overnight and returned to the man's house the next morning. The bride can't go back to her husband's house after sunset. There is a saying that "my mother-in-law is blind when she goes home at sunset."
Songhetang
In the past, the farewell hall was usually at noon on the third day, and the bride was sent back to her husband's family by her sisters and cousins. , known as the "farewell hall". Lunch is arranged by the man's family. In the afternoon, the bride stays and the others come back. Now I usually go to the man's house with the bride on my wedding day and ask me to sit down. Return after the New Year's Eve dinner.
Live on the moon
Living in the right month means that the bride stays in the man's house for a few days and then stays in the woman's house for a few days. It usually takes four days, six days and eight days. Get rich in four seasons, get rich in six or six, get rich in eight or eight. The time to live in the opposite month is decided by both parents. First, they will live in the man's house, and then in the woman's house. Until they live in opposite months, the bride and groom will become real husband and wife.
There are numerous customs in various places, such as stars. The above is just a general situation of marriage in northern Shaanxi. Summarize and sort it out for readers.
Editor in charge: Wu
The above is about the auspicious day of the twelfth lunar month in 2022, and about the sharing of weddings. I watched the wedding day of the Year of the Rat. I hope this will help everyone!