When talking about marriage, the test is not only the assessment of family conditions of both parties, but also the assessment of personality. Talking about marriage is bound to involve material things. After all, marriage is not as simple as falling in love, and it is necessary to pave the way for the future. However, unilaterally testing the material foundation cannot guarantee the quality of a marriage.
Another important factor in marriage is the consideration of personality. This not only refers to the personality of both parties to the marriage, but also includes the personality of both families. There is a saying that marriage is not a matter for two people, but a matter for two families. A person's character is not good, and a family's character is problematic. Even if you can't bear to get married, you are afraid that the future marriage life will be very fierce and miserable.
However, with the prevalence of social comparison, many families always make excessive demands on bride price or other gift money for various reasons when talking about marriage. No one will accept greedy requests again and again. After all, everyone has their own bottom line. But some people put the cart before the horse, and finally ruined a beautiful marriage for nothing because of a moment of greed, which is really regrettable.
Some people say that talking about marriage is the touchstone of marriage. A Zi also agrees with this view. At the stage of talking about marriage, being able to see clearly the quality of a person and a family is a good foundation for your future marriage happiness. If the other person's character is not good enough, stop loss in time, although it will hinder face, but long-term pain is better than short-term pain, and it can also avoid the misfortune of future marriage.
A colleague's friend, while serving as the best man for his good brother, witnessed the embarrassment of the groom smashing the venue and canceling the wedding on the spot. Knowing the ins and outs of the incident, I can also understand what the groom did at that time. Colleagues and friends say that personality is really important in marriage.
Colleagues and friends said that the groom's name is Liu Wei and he and the bride are free to know each other. After two years of love, I began to talk about marriage and get married.
Liu Wei's family conditions are good. His parents have opened several chain stores in the local area, and Liu Wei is the only child, so the money earned by his parents is basically for Liu Wei.
Liu Wei himself is not bad. After graduating from college, he worked in a foreign company by his own efforts. In a few years, I achieved middle management.
Liu Wei's girlfriend Feifei is also the only daughter in the family, and both parents have stable jobs.
Liu Wei thought that the relationship with Feifei was stable. After meeting her parents, she also agreed to their marriage. So, before the wedding, the two got the certificate first.
Originally thought, this marriage is an established fact, and talking about marriage is only a process to be taken in marriage. Unexpectedly, on the way to the wedding, the marriage finally fell through.
After they got the marriage certificate, they started the stage of talking about marriage according to their parents' requirements. Feifei's parents suggested that Liu Wei prepare a wedding room and a car worth more than 200,000 yuan. Liu Wei feels that the requirements for the wedding room and car are not too much. After all, two people still have to have these material foundations to get married. Coupled with the money I have accumulated over the years and the support of my parents, the wedding room and car will be ready soon.
Speaking of wedding gifts, Feifei's parents demanded 688,888 yuan on the spot. This amount is quite a lot. Liu Wei wants to discuss whether it can be reduced. But Feifei's parents don't want to let go, because they only have one daughter, and the amount of bride price is also the custom of their own family. Daughter's marriage is a big event, and not a penny less.
It's not that Liu Wei's family can't afford the money, but before talking about the bride price, Liu Wei has spent almost 500 thousand to prepare for the wedding. These include 200,000 wedding company designated by Feifei's family, 200,000 banquet money and other three gold expenses.
Liu Wei originally thought that Feifei's family would accept a little less bride price, just for good luck. However, I didn't expect Feifei's parents to ask for a bride price of 688,888 yuan.
Later, Liu Wei's parents managed to collect money for Liu Wei. After all, the two have already obtained the license, and the wedding will be held, so the gift money is naturally necessary.
At the stage of talking about marriage, Wei Liu was exhausted by the demands of Feifei's family. He had no idea that Feifei, who is gentle, should have such a pair of powerful parents.
On the wedding day, the groom Liu Wei went to Feifei's house to meet her relatives with the best man group and wedding team composed of six good brothers. But when Liu Wei and the wedding team arrived at Feifei's door, they met another threshold.
Other grooms, when picking up the bride, can meet the relatives of the woman's family at most and ask for some red envelopes, cigarettes and wine. But Liu Wei met his father-in-law on the way to pick up the bride.
I saw my father-in-law standing in front of his house in a straight suit, and Feifei in a white wedding dress shyly hid behind his father. My father-in-law said to Liu Wei with a big smile, "Liu Wei, I want to give you my favorite daughter." But to show your sincerity, please pay an extra180,000 bride price. Now my daughter is my darling,180,000 means colorful, full of green. I hope your married life can be wonderful! "
The father-in-law threw this question on the spot, which caught Liu Wei off guard.
Liu Wei got impatient and got angry on the spot. He looked at his father-in-law, who was cocky at the door, and Feifei, who was silent behind his back, and his heart suddenly became cold. At the stage of talking about marriage, Feifei's family put forward high demands for money more than once, and Liu Wei also met them one by one. Unexpectedly, his father-in-law had the cheek and deliberately gave himself a problem on the way to pick up relatives. It seems that they really don't want the wedding to go smoothly.
Liu Wei held back his inner anger and wanted the wedding to go on smoothly. So he said to his father-in-law with a wry smile, "Dad, are you kidding?" The gift money has been given before, and now you suddenly ask me to add180 thousand. Where can I get it for you right away? I really love Feifei, so please do me a favor and let me take Feifei home. "
Who knows, when my father-in-law heard this, he pulled down his face and refused to say, "That won't do. Your sincerity doesn't mean what you say. You must take practical action. 180,000 is180,000, and a good marriage will have a good ending. Without this 180 thousand, I won't give my daughter into your hands. "
Seeing such an unreasonable father-in-law, Liu Wei was completely desperate and said directly: "I don't have180,000, and I won't give it. Your daughter is too expensive for me to marry. What about this marriage? I'm not getting married either. By the way, please return the previous gift of 688,888 yuan in full! "
The groomsmen want to persuade Liu Wei not to be so impulsive. After all, they are already at home. It was even suggested that six groomsmen go to the bank to withdraw 20,000 cash each, totaling120,000, which is not only to give face to the father-in-law, but also to make the wedding go smoothly. But Liu Wei refused, saying, "Don't worry about me, don't say180,000 or120,000, even if it is 80,000, 800 or 80, I won't pay another penny. I really can't afford such a home! "
After that, Liu Wei came back with the best man group and the wedding team. Feifei's family and all the relatives and friends present were dumbfounded.
It turned out that Feifei's parents knew that Liu Wei's family conditions were good and said that Liu Wei was a lavish son-in-law in front of relatives and friends. Feifei's father also wanted to show off in front of relatives and friends, but he was humiliated.
Liu Wei went back to the hotel, and briefly explained the reasons with relatives and friends, so that everyone could eat as usual. After dinner, Liu Wei returned all the money sent by his friends.
Afterwards, Liu Wei and Feifei went to the Civil Affairs Bureau for divorce. Many people advised Wei Liu to forget what happened and let the two of them have a good life in the future. But Liu Wei refused. He said that there are too many moths in this family, and I really can't stand it.
Liu Wei's father-in-law suddenly raised the price on the way to pick up relatives, which was really wonderful. I have to say that some people regard marriage as a means to collect money, and then make up some reasons that sound beautiful but can't be refused. However, not everyone is stupid. When your demands are too much to accept, don't say that you have given you face, but try your best to get back what you have paid.
Feifei's parents talk about marriage, asking for high gifts and all kinds of high demands. On the surface, they are fighting for the interests of their daughter, but in fact they regard their daughter's marriage as a bargaining business. Their behavior also exposed their bad character.
Fortunately, when Liu Wei's father-in-law asked for a price increase of180,000 yuan, he did not blindly follow, but decisively refused and stopped it in time. Otherwise, after marriage, I'm afraid my in-laws will regard Liu Wei's family as an ATM and talk about money all the time. Being in-laws with such people does more harm than good.
Look at personality before marriage, especially at the stage of talking about marriage. The personality of a person and a family can easily be distinguished from their practices and behaviors in the stage of talking about marriage.
Some people are lucky enough to think that at the stage of talking about marriage, they can make any demands and demands under the banner of marriage. This kind of behavior undoubtedly exposes its corrupt character and makes people have to stay away from it.
Marriage is a major event in life. When talking about marriage, we should also learn to polish our eyes and learn to distinguish. I would rather choose a person with good character but slightly poor material conditions to get married than a person with poor character. Material conditions can be won by hard work the day after tomorrow, but many things such as personality have been finalized and it is difficult to change the day after tomorrow.