At the beginning, most of the power of public opinion was on the side of men. Before I know it carefully, I also think that the woman's family is too strong, and there is really no need to make trouble on the wedding day because of this.
But later, as the bride and the bride's family came out to talk, the direction began to change.
Because many people question that the bride's family is for the bride price. The father of the bride said that they didn't marry their daughter for money. The man's family paid 88,000 yuan for bride price, 20,000 yuan for clothes, 654.38+10,000 yuan in cash as dowry, and some bedding and furniture. The value is definitely much higher than that of the man.
The woman mainly feels that she is not respected.
According to the bride's cousin, the size of underwear bought by the man is the smallest, and there are local customs, which means that my girl should be modest and cautious when she marries your family. Moreover, at that time, the woman mentioned it and accompanied her to buy it, but the man's mother said she would buy it.
Some people are questioning that the woman said this at midnight the day before her wedding, and where to buy a new one at midnight. This is a deliberate finding fault.
I read the report, because the clothes were delivered the night before the wedding, just in time. I checked, from 23: 00 p.m. to 0 1: 00 p.m. and midnight 12. It was definitely not intentional.
When the woman started the ceremony, she felt that her underwear was very small. She called her boyfriend and said she couldn't wear underwear. That man's attitude is not very good. She said something like "you can't buy it, you can wear it old, or you can wear it like this", while her boyfriend's mother said "you can return it if you don't want to tie it, and you can return as much as you collect"
The woman's view is that in fact, if the man speaks better, it will be over. For example, you can say, "Honey, please understand, put it on quietly, and I'll buy it for you later."
The next day, the man came to pick up the bride, and the woman still hoped that the man would have an attitude and be soft on this matter.
That man's attitude is still very tough. There is a question of "Will you come with me?". Will you marry or not? "Someone in the wedding procession shouted" Don't get married, give up the bride price. "
The bride's cousin stressed that they had got a marriage certificate, and the man's attitude and way of speaking changed the next day.
As a result, the bride's family was even more dissatisfied, thinking that they had been wronged before they got married, so the bride's father refused to take the bride directly.
Rome wasn't built in a day, and there were big or small contradictions in the wedding communication between the two families in advance. Coupled with this underwear incident, all the contradictions were pushed to a peak and completely triggered.
From this point of view, this incident is not simply caused by a pair of underwear. If nothing else, one thing is certain, the man's attitude is bound to be problematic.
Perhaps in the eyes of the man's family, this is what the bride's family did. She has got a marriage certificate, which is her own. There is no need to care about these little things. She should follow her family and not always make trouble on purpose. Only in this way can she be a good wife and daughter-in-law.
Nowadays, many people think that after marriage, two people should be equal, care for each other, understand each other and respect each other, so as to live a good life. It is good to have two surnames in marriage, not enemies.
However, I want to say that this is really an ideal state, but it is very difficult to practice it completely in life, because not all people think so. Especially in the eyes of the older generation, many people tend to give each other a fright at first, and then they can hold each other. This concept exists between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, especially between husband and wife.
It is not surprising that there is a local custom to buy the smallest size underwear, which means that the woman must keep a low profile. I have heard many similar stories in my life.
For example, when getting married, two people bow to each other, and whose head is low means low status at home. I have been to such a wedding. As a result, the woman was particularly sincere and bowed 90 degrees at once. When the groom saw the situation, he dropped his head to the ground. Obviously, he was deliberately lower than the woman, and the whole audience burst into laughter.
In fact, give and take is the best way to get along, not that I want to crush you and give you some color to see see, and then you are afraid that I will let me.
I once heard a friend say that it was popular there that whoever won the first quarrel after marriage always prevailed in the marriage, and then one of her cousins copied the stool directly at that time, just to win.
On the other hand, since there is such a local custom, it is impossible for the man and mother not to know that it is definitely inappropriate to buy the smallest size directly, whether intentionally or unintentionally. Moreover, the tone of the discussion in the later period is not good, and there is a posture of "you love to marry or not", and you can also say "don't marry and refund money". I think it is impossible for any girl's parents not to be angry when they hear this.
Many young people get married, and many things are still decided by their parents, so this contest has become a contest between their parents, and the taste has gradually changed.
I have heard of such a thing.
Two young people got married on blind date. As a result, at the wedding, the woman's parents deliberately kept frowning and didn't give each other a good look. Later, when asked why, the bride's father said, "I just want to give the man some color to let them know that my girl is not easy to mess with, and then I will be nice to her and dare not bully her."
After hearing this statement, I suddenly realized that the father's original intention of leaving must be for his daughter's good, because this is their long-standing values, they think this is the correct cognition, and they are afraid of prestige and morality. I believe many people want to criticize it, but it's no use criticizing it.
It's like some girls don't want to marry their in-laws, but they are rejected, thinking that their daughter-in-law is cheap and can be taken care of at will, and they can marry again after divorce. If you reason with such a mother-in-law and talk about mutual respect, it's like casting pearls before swine, which in turn may piss you off.
Not everyone has the same idea. Everyone's thinking is influenced by age, education level, growth environment and other factors. It can be said that Qianshan faces each other across the river. Don't try to convince others with your reasons, it's asking for unhappiness.
Therefore, marriage is not only a matter of personal conduct, but also a matter of the conduct and upbringing of the other family.
Marriage, the most important thing is to get along comfortably. Two people together, the road of life is so long, before the big waves come, the boat has turned over. Naturally, there is no need to continue sailing together.
From this point of view, the couple in the news broke up because of a pair of underwear, which is unfortunate but also lucky.