"Son, don't waste your time, aunt just got your favor. No matter how much you try to persuade me, it's useless. Don't say I'm only 65 years old now. Even if I am 85 years old now, I will divorce him. It is useless to persuade anyone. " This is what the old man said.
A friend said that there are many people like this old man, and their divorce attitude is usually very firm, and there is basically no room for manoeuvre. Just like this aunt Wang, she danced happily when she got the divorce certificate. She said: The feeling of holding a divorce certificate is as exciting and jubilant as 1949 when the country was liberated. I feel that the world is beautiful.
"You are so old, children are abroad. What should I do if I am sick at ordinary times? " My friend kindly reminded me. As a result, Aunt Wang smiled brightly again. She said, "Son, in my past 40 years of marriage, I always helped my neighbor when I was sick. If it is not too urgent, my brothers and sisters will take care of me and my children. "
It turns out that Aunt Wang's husband is a particularly grumpy person. At that time, Aunt Wang endured the man's insult and even physical injury for a pair of twin daughters. And this kind of injury happens when men are particularly awake. After drinking, they cried and laughed for a while, and apologized to Aunt Wang for a while. Said he shouldn't have hit her, and said he owed Aunt Wang too much in his life. I just don't change after waking up, and I laugh at myself, saying that what I said after drinking is not credible.
That man is not an alcoholic. When he is drunk, it is rare. It is conceivable that Aunt Wang has few good days after marriage. However, men at least know how to return their wages to their children at home, which is the only reason why Aunt Wang persisted.
Aunt Wang said that because her mother's family is better than her husband's, she earns more money than men, and she is beautiful (of course, Aunt Wang's husband is also very handsome), so the man's deep inferiority complex turned him into a fist and aimed at Aunt Wang's fist.
He saw Aunt Wang's filial piety to her parents-in-law and education for her children, all of which were good, but she just couldn't get out of the shadow of inferiority. Therefore, their marriage has always survived by quarreling and beating Aunt Wang.
Now that both daughters have gone abroad for development, Aunt Wang herself has retired. She has no reason to continue to put up with this man who has bullied her for most of her life. Most importantly, the two daughters also supported Aunt Wang's divorce, because they were also victims of that unfortunate marriage. Growing up, they not only witnessed their father beating and cursing their mother for no reason, but also their two sisters were beaten by their father.
A friend said that Aunt Wang told him repeatedly that she was welcome to attend her own "divorce celebration" if she had time during the 11th holiday. She said that this is not to follow the fashion trend, but to make her restart her new life more ceremonial.
"The young couple are old friends" is the most appropriate interpretation of the practical significance of marriage. No one will know this, but few people will have a long-term vision and know how to be kind to their wives when they are young for their old companions. What's more, when I was young and strong, I used the strength brought about by gender differences to beat women, and I used the forbearance of women's mothers to push my luck.
However, there is such a thing as cause and effect in this world. The good and evil in youth and the fruit in old age will give the fairest answer.
"You are grandma (grandma), still dare to learn young people divorce? What a shame! " This is what stupid men think.
He doesn't know that young people need love in marriage, and so do old people. Marriage without emotional nourishment is doomed to wither. He didn't know the situation clearly. Compared with a man who beats his wife or cheats, divorce is only a personal emotional choice, not to mention any shame. It's really shameful to be afraid of jumping out of an unhappy marriage.
Just like Aunt Wang's ex-husband, she didn't forget to pour dirty water on Aunt Wang at the divorce registry, complaining loudly while going out, saying that Aunt Wang was heartless and ignorant, and so on.
For a heartless man, he can't give his wife love and care when he is young, but he can only eat his own bitter fruit when he is old, and he can't get his wife's care and companionship.
For people in their time, common sense is not easy to divorce, but now, they divorce so simply, without dragging their feet at all, which is enough to show that marriage is really "as you sow, so you reap", and no one can escape this law.
Moreover, according to the data of the sixth population census in 20 10, the divorce rate of the elderly has doubled compared with 30 years ago, and China has ushered in a wave of divorce for the elderly.
Attentive netizens also launched a collection of stories about "Divorce in the Elderly", and found that nearly 80% of divorces were initiated by wives, among which 60% said that they "have always wanted to divorce and have been looking for the right time".
Then, from these old people who dare to love and leave, what should young people do to avoid the marriage being ruined by regret?
In short, the following three points are the three most important red lines to effectively avoid the ending of "No Country for Old Men", which must not be touched:
First, it broke the agreement of husband and wife loyalty.
From the moment you get the marriage certificate, this "loyalty" contract will take effect automatically and does not need to be marked again on the marriage certificate.
Although not all infidelity will be punished at the cost of divorce, betraying feelings must hurt each other's hearts and directly ignite the fuse of marital relationship breakdown.
Many women, especially those who already have children, will choose to bear the fact that their husbands are cheating because they care about their children. In this scruple, there are economic considerations and children's mental health considerations.
Therefore, there is a situation that "children divorce when they go to college" and "children divorce when they get married".
When a child grows up, it is the best time for a woman to escape from a painful marriage. Men are still planning to be served by their wives, thinking that quarrels and fights can go all the way when they are young, but there will definitely be no more variables when they are old.
In fact, the evil causes planted when I was a child will always bear the due fruit. Betraying your wife when you are young, you must pay it back when you are old.
Second, you can't be honest with each other
"Married is a family". Many married men will say this to their wives, but the implication here is often: you are mine when you get married, so your money, house and car will naturally be mine. Moreover, my parents are also your parents, and my relatives are also your relatives. You have to pay, work hard and be generous.
I know your whereabouts like the back of my hand. You should report to me where you went, who you met at your parents' house, what you bought and how much you spent.
However, he didn't let his wife know about his own money, or he just lied and was indifferent to his parents-in-law. He never confessed when he went out, and he didn't explain when he came home late. Sometimes he even deliberately goes out behind his wife's back to do some "mysterious" things and secretly gives money to his parents.
This is very destructive to the management of marriage and the long-term development of husband-wife relationship. It seems that you are smart, but in fact, the other person may not be as stupid as you think. You are hiding something from others, but you ask others to be 100% transparent to you. In this unequal mode of getting along, once the other person has the ability to leave, he will definitely escape decisively and never look back. Please believe that this has nothing to do with middle age or old age. People who want to leave dare to leave like white hair because their hearts are broken.
Third, the occurrence of domestic violence.
As we all know, domestic violence not only refers to physical violence, but also includes verbal violence and mental violence.
Physical violence is easy to understand, that is, direct physical attacks on your partner, such as punching, kicking, slapping, pinching your neck and so on.
Mental violence is threats, intimidation, abuse, etc. Let the other person feel psychologically afraid of himself. There is also economic violence, that is, forcibly controlling and dominating your partner's money and property, which once caused the other party to fall into a state of deep mental anxiety.
No matter what kind of violence it is, as long as it accounts for one of them, the marriage will not end well. Domestic violence is like an "untimely bomb" in marriage, which will be "detonated" at any time because the victim's patience reaches the limit, and the marriage will be "bombed" into a mess, and there is no room for recovery.
There is a popular saying on the Internet: "All divorces are planned for a long time". Behind this plot is an unbearable counterattack: jump out of the "fire pit" and live for yourself for a lifetime.
The emergence of the divorce tide of the elderly once again gives serious advice to the marriage of young people: when marriage has not triggered the above three red lines, we are willing to realize the essence of marriage and its importance to a person's life in time, and then firmly fulfill our loyalty obligations to our partners and convey our sincere love. Don't wait for the desolation of No Country for Old Men in the future to shed tears of regret. You have to wipe those tears yourself. #