That's a sense of loss, and it's a normal psychology of people. You have to think about what will happen to you.
Love will always inadvertently make us prisoners and become a fool who doesn't know sunny and cloudy days for the other half, but more often, we all like to be nourished by love in the same sunshine and feel each other's heartbeat under the same umbrella. We are happy, we are happy, we are sad, we are sad, but in the end we all hold the same voice and say to each other, I love you.
Like you said, you are confused. You don't know what you should do. Actually, people are very simple. You don't need to be together to love someone. I know you are not great, not great at all, and selfish. Selfish still want to be with him, but the reality is cruel. You should know that he is married, he has a family and a man's responsibility to a woman, and that woman is not you. Your end is sealed. When we broke up, we already chose the way to go in the future. From now on, don't think about him, treat him as a stranger and treat your husband as your arm. I don't know if you loved your husband. However, since we can be together, we will feel a little bit, so from now on, forget the past, throw away our old selves, change clothes, change our hair style, find a beautiful place, travel around, think about what unfinished dreams we have, and don't leave any regrets for our future. Although I am only a girl of 19 years old, I know a lot! Sister can't be worse than me! Sister, chat with me when you are free! I'm also secretly thinking about my ex-boyfriend! But he hasn't found a girlfriend yet, but I still don't want to look back and keep all the good things in my heart. We still have a good life in the future!