Rural classic jokes, in life, there are many funny jokes, some of which are about the countryside. These jokes can not only bring joy to people, but also add fun to their lives. Let's share the classic rural paragraphs and get to know them together.

Rural classic joke 1 1, Han Er's brain is not normal, and his brother made a fortune in Shanghai, so he booked a plane ticket online to let him fly over to study. This is the first time that Han Er has ever flown. He walked into the cabin and sat in the first class seat. After seeing Hannah's boarding pass, the stewardess politely said to him, Sir, you are economy class, please go to the back! Han's stubborn temper came up: What's the matter? Bullying our rural people is honesty! Why can't others sit here? The two sides were deadlocked and the plane could not take off. Finally, the captain came over, and after carefully understanding the situation, he found that Han Er's brain was abnormal. In order not to affect the normal take-off, he only said: Hello, I am the captain of this flight. The front seat of this flight is for Beijing and the back seat is for Shanghai! Han eryi immediately bounced up from his seat: mom, I almost took the wrong seat! I didn't say that! Why didn't this girl make it clear just now? Fortunately, the plane hasn't left yet! Then he mumbled and ran straight to the back seat …

In 1970s, rural children were obsessed with fruit candy, but now children can't understand it. At that time, Erwa's classmate's house set up a candy stand on the street corner, and each penny was a fruit candy. Every day after school, Erwa has to stand for her mother. Several close classmates always wander around the candy stand like bees, drooling. One of the clever students came up with a bad idea: open the candy paper and lick it before wrapping it. Anyway, no one knows whether it can continue to sell! Later, his mother counted a lot of sweets every day, only to find that the sweets were getting smaller and smaller! At first, Erwa insisted that the weather was hot and candy, and she was beaten. Poor Erwa's classmates had to confess everything!

Some people forget their roots after working in other places for several years. Just back to my hometown pond, I saw an old man with a hat looking down for sweet potatoes, so I pointed to the ducks swimming in the middle of the pond and asked the old man with a broken trump: Uncle, uncle, what bird is swimming in the middle of the water? The old man looked up and found his little son back. He was angry that his son forgot Ben after going out for a few years, so he replied angrily: dog! I have only been out for a few years. Did you pull out the sweet potato shit? I can't believe I don't even know ducks. What bird? Asshole bird

Black egg often quarrels with his wife, and every time it is black egg who rushes out to die. On this day, after quarreling with a black egg, she rushed out of the door and threatened to jump into the river. As a result, her daughter-in-law ignored him and went straight to bed. The old yellow dog at home followed him to the river, jumped up and down excitedly, and accidentally bumped the black egg strolling by the river into the river. In winter, the cotton-padded jacket and trousers are soaked, and the black eggs are shivering with cold. No choice but to go home and knock at the door: element fragrance, element fragrance, open the door! After knocking for a long time, there was a loud shout: didn't you jump into the river? What are you doing here? Black egg can't stand the cold, so he has to beg for mercy: I was wrong, so I won't dare again!

A fool went on a blind date, and the matchmaker repeatedly told him in advance: invite your mother's family to dinner later. You should be gentle. I'll tie a twine on your leg, and I'll drag you to take a bite of food, remember? The fool nodded and answered, remember. It was normal at first. Every time the matchmaker pulls the hemp rope, the fool takes a bite of the dish. Unexpectedly, an old hen suddenly ran under the table and just tripped over the rope. Now the fool is trying his best to pick up the vegetables, his mouth is full and the rope is still pulling. Fool is anxious: you want to strangle me with a shovel!

Rural classic jokes 2 rural classic jokes

1, the country aunt runs a pig farm. One hundred pigs finally gained weight, and a group of law enforcement officers came and asked, "What are you feeding this pig?" Aunt told me truthfully: "swill, leftover soup, potato leaves, miscellaneous vegetables." The law enforcement officer's face sank: "This pork will be eaten in the future. How can you feed this stuff! A fine of three thousand! "

The next day, another group of law enforcement officers came and asked, "What are you feeding this pig?" Aunt learned well this time: "My pig is fed with rice and bread." Who knows that the face of law enforcement officers sank: "No! Some people still don't have enough to eat. If you waste food like this, you will be fined 3 thousand! "

On the third day, another group of law enforcement officers came and asked, "What are you feeding this pig?" Aunt thought for a long time and carefully replied, "My pigs eat leaves and grass." Who knows that law enforcement officers still have a heavy face: "You pigs don't feed pig food, and feeding leaves and grass doesn't destroy greening?" A fine of 3,000! "On the fourth day, another group of law enforcement officers came and asked," What are you feeding this pig? "Aunt was angry at this moment and said coldly," I don't need to feed this pig. "Who knows that the law enforcement officers still face a heavy:" Don't you feed this pig to gain weight? "Aunt ha ha said with a smile:

"Yes, I give a pig ten dollars a day, and they buy whatever they want! ! "

2. The country aunt has a son who has been transferred to Shenzhen for a long time, and soon became a deputy section chief, with a "mistress" outside. The wife who lives in her hometown is anxious and tells her aunt. Aunt stamped her feet with anger. When the son goes home to visit relatives, the aunt grabs the broom and hits without saying anything! My son knows what he's thinking. So while hiding from the broom, he said to menstruation, "Mom, don't worry. Listen to me. " "What to say? ! "Aunt continue to play. After the classmates jumped away, they shouted to their mother, "Mom! Shenzhen is a special zone, do you know? The government has a document stipulating that you can marry two wives if you are a minor or above!

"The government has a file? Aunt's broom stopped in mid-air, paused for a moment, and muttered, "It's another thing to have files.

3. The country aunt and daughter-in-law were at home, and two thieves robbed the house.

Aunt begged, "Brother Thief, please leave us alone!"

Daughter-in-law said, "Yes, uncle thief, there is nothing valuable in my house."

Aunt said, "Brother Thief, please be kind."

Daughter-in-law said, "I will remember uncle thief's great kindness ..."

The two thieves couldn't stand it anymore, so they just stopped searching and struck the table with knives:

"Why, you this NianLia mouth can be clean? ! Brother is called brother, and uncle is called uncle! Why are thieves before thieves? "

The country aunt went to visit her son in the city. When she went to the bathroom, a big earthquake suddenly happened. When people dug her out of the ruins, she smiled and said, "This is really interesting. As soon as I pulled the toilet, the house fell down. "

5. When the country aunt meets the talented person in the neighbor's house, she always calls out "brother talented person" with a warm kiss, but yesterday, the talented person was a little unhappy. He said sternly to her, "See you later. I want another position. 〃

Aunt doesn't know what a position is, and she doesn't know that Cai Liang became the section chief yesterday.

Early the next morning, my aunt met a talented person and greeted her gracefully: "Good morning, brother. 〃