* * * *' s wife:

Hello, although we have never met, thank you for your willingness to accept some "good goods at the bottom of the box" from our team. At the same time, our * * brand products have the following main functions, please read them carefully:

1, ATM function: this product can ensure that you have no worries about food and clothing and a happy life;

2, long-term work function: you can share responsibility and sorrow for you, and take care of your work all your life;

3, sowing function: sowing laughter for you, but also sowing fun and the next generation for you;

4. Safety function: This product is injected with enough "anti-male inferiority vaccine" and "anti-temptation vaccine", so it can give you enough sense of security.

Please feel free to use the above functions. We implement the principle of quality and quantity, but we don't return them.

Usage: love+care+trust Date of production: more than 30 years ago Shelf life: 50 years left.

If there are any minor faults during use, please contact the outstanding representative of the CPC Central Committee in our team:

Fault 1, please consult Comrade++,Tel: I am very busy.

The second question, please ask your comrades. Telephone: It depends on the situation analysis.

Please consult Comrade # # for No.3 fault. Telephone: No problem.

Please consult @ @ @ Comrade for No.4 fault. Tel: Whatever.

Contact information: Qi Xin works together to create the world.

Finally, on behalf of all the members of our team, I wish you and your purchased * * * brand products a happy and harmonious life, and your second-generation products will be produced and listed smoothly.

Waiting for a good man to buy another "bottom goods" of the team.

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Second,

Ladies and gentlemen,

Good is Shumputei on the lake, wicker is love.

Today is a red-letter day, and today is a warm day. Today is an unforgettable day for the two newcomers.

Our Mr. XXX won the heart of the bride, Miss XXX, with his loyalty and wisdom. More importantly, however, our miss XXX completely conquered the groom Mr. XXX with her enthusiasm and beauty.

As the saying goes, lovers get married. On behalf of all the guests, I sincerely wish the bride and groom happiness and everlasting happiness.

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Third, a woman's toast.

Dear guests and friends, hello!

I'm a colleague of the bride, the eternal champion of the industrial circle! But what I am playing here today is neither a leader nor a colleague! But a glorious, great and sacred new role! Witness!

Although I am not very familiar with the groom, based on my understanding of the bride, I can accurately infer that the groom once traveled all the way and went through hardships before he got what he wanted and achieved a positive result. And the bride * * * as a famous love bole, of course, is also one in a thousand to find her Mr Right. I believe that two people must go through the same arduous journey, and finally walk into the sacred wedding hall on this unforgettable weekend-165438+20081October 22, and arrive at the new station of love long-distance running!

At this moment, as the representative of every distinguished guest present, I read our testimony and announce to the 5 billion people in the world that they are married through all wireless transmission systems such as sound waves, magnetic fields and brain waves! ! !

We can't describe in words how shocking this is to the people on earth! Because people expect and firmly believe that this will be a great historical moment! Their combination will be a great milestone in the history of human love! Fifty years later, one hundred years later, ten thousand years later! People will still relish their love stories when they eat! Women will demand their husbands based on the groom! Men, on the other hand, always pretend to be casual in front of their wives, thus suggesting that their wives should follow suit!

These days, all walks of life are very concerned about this wedding. When talking about the wedding, the newly elected president of the United States, Obama, said with deep affection: "Mr. * and Miss * * * will prove to people that their union will be as historic as my election as President of the United States. Bin Laden lived in the mountains for a long time, and he was not afraid to risk his life. He issued a statement to the outside world by video the night before yesterday, calling on Islamic brothers to lay down their weapons and drink in pubs on1October 22nd, 165438 to safeguard world peace and ensure the safety of this wedding!

Speaking of which, I wonder if the bride and groom feel the weight of marriage! Your parents, family, colleagues, friends and all those who care about you will look forward to your marriage from now on. You bid farewell to the past and embarked on a wonderful new stage of life. On this stage, you will play many roles such as husband, wife, parents, daughter-in-law and son-in-law, shouldering the great trust of the times! As a witness here, what I can give you on behalf of everyone is just a word "Fu"! I wish you can love each other! Harmony and beauty! Grow old together! Don't let your family down, don't let your friends down! Don't let bin Laden down! Don't disappoint Obama! Don't disappoint all the 5 billion people in the world who care about you, and send you a deep blessing! ! ! thank you

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The following is the appendix

Speech by the groom's father:

I wish them a loving couple, respect each other as guests, live in harmony with their families and honor their parents in their future lives.

In the work, I can unite my colleagues and respect the leaders, and my career is smooth and prosperous.

Finally, I hope all the guests will drink more wine, taste more food, raise their glasses and have fun together!

thank you

Mother-in-law's wedding message recommendation: `

The first sentence, I wish you a hundred years of hand in hand and a happy family.

The second sentence, I wish you kindness, love and diligence.

In the third sentence, I hope you can put yourself in the other's shoes and create, cultivate, run in, build, maintain and enhance your marriage in the years to come. Finally, I am extremely grateful to God for coming, and sincerely pray that God will always take care of my daughter and son-in-law! Thank you again for coming, and wish you a pleasant meal and a wonderful time.

Father-in-law's article on congratulations from newlyweds;

Dear ladies and gentlemen, hello!

Today is a big day for my daughter * * * and her husband * * * to get along for a hundred years. As the woman's father, first of all, on behalf of my family, I would like to thank all my relatives and friends for their warm presence. At the same time, I also want to take this opportunity to admonish my daughter and son-in-law, hoping that they will respect their parents and elders and love each other after marriage.

No amount of words can express my good mood at such a beautiful moment. I hope my relatives and friends here can enjoy everything here and eat and drink happily.

Classic wedding greetings-groom edition:

I'm so excited to get married for the first time (laughs). Let me say a few words briefly. Although it is the first time to get married, I still have deep feelings. In this matter of marriage, it is the newcomers who are happy and the relatives who are tired. For the four old people who have worked hard for us for more than 20 years, in recent days, I have worked hard for our marriage and added white hair to my temples. I feel deeply guilty and grateful. Having said that, I think all my words today can be condensed into two words, that is, thank you!

First of all, I would like to thank all the guests present for being important witnesses of my love with Peng on this beautiful day. Without you, there would be no wedding that my wife and I will never forget.

The wedding bride made a humorous speech: First, from now on, try not to buy new clothes, and really add them, regardless of other colors except black. Reason: Black clothes are dirty. Generally speaking, you can't see it if you don't wash it for two months, which can save water and washing powder. It is estimated that if you only wear black clothes, you can save an average of 3 yuan a month. According to this calculation, 10 month is 30 yuan, 100 month is 300 yuan, 1000 month is 3000 yuan, and 1000 month is 30000 yuan. I really don't know, I'm shocked! If you can live 65,438+10,000 months, you can buy a house only by wearing black clothes to save money on water and washing powder.

From now on, you must quit smoking.

Reason: This reason is too justified, because your smoking expenses sometimes exceed your meals! In fact, I wanted to tell you to quit smoking for a long time, but every time I mentioned it, you said you would quit smoking unless you died. It's because I'm too soft-hearted that your bad habit has been maintained until now. But from now on, you have no choice but to quit smoking. Of course, between quitting smoking and dying, you can also choose the latter. But considering that you are still young, I advise you not to choose the latter.

You must give up drinking from now on. Reason: Although I don't drink alcohol, I don't drink it often, but I still need to drink a little occasionally. Although you only drink a little at a time, it will be a big expense in the long run.

Maybe you say that work is hard and drinking can relieve fatigue. But I think there are many ways to relieve fatigue. I'll give you a massage after work, which can also relieve fatigue. Otherwise, let's have a fight. Facts have proved that fighting is more tiring than anything else.

From now on, you must use your mobile phone reasonably.

Reason: Your monthly phone bill is also a big expense. But according to my observation, 90% of the calls you make and receive are nonsense. From now on, you can only open it at work and close it as soon as you get off work.

The reason is simple: turn on your cell phone at work so that you can call back from the company phone. So you must remember this: if the phone rings, don't answer it, use the company phone to go back and use it as a pager.

These are suggestions for you. Because the host asked me to talk too much, I have talked about 800 words now. That's all I can think of for the time being. There must be something I didn't expect. Please think about it for me. Let me know when you think about it. At the same time, I will continue to give you hope with my actions after marriage. Here I want to ask my parents-in-law, okay?