Shanghai's wedding customs are characterized by the combination of Chinese and Western culture, which is not only the characteristic of China, but also the absolute fashion, just like the culture, tolerance and combination of Chinese and Western culture in the Tang Dynasty.

★ The origin of Shanghai wedding customs ★

Shanghai Port 1843. Since then, its trade has developed and its industry and commerce have prospered. Residents from all over the world have become a city where five places live together, and European customs have gradually merged with eastern and western cultures. In terms of holding weddings, each has its own local customs, but since 150, it has also formed the wedding customs in Shanghai.

Pre-marital activities-from "blind date" to "dowry"

Old-fashioned marriage, the combination of men and women, is mostly the life of parents in the words of the media. After the opening of Shanghai, this custom was abandoned and improved, and was introduced by men and women. After being introduced, they looked at each other at the agreed place. This is called "blind date". There are also men and women who, after getting to know each other, agree on a place and ask their parents to come and see it, which is also called "blind date". After the two sides are satisfied with each other, they should also invite a respected person to be a formal matchmaker. Because this matchmaker does not actually play the role of introduction, it is called "ready-made matchmaker", from which we can see the influence of the old custom that "marriage must have three media and six certificates" After the woman's family agrees, the man's family will give a "small gift", commonly known as "cutting red", which will send a birthday, that is, a future grandfather. After a considerable period of time, the man's family will have a "dish ceremony" to entertain relatives and friends to inform relatives and neighbors that the marriage has been decided.

In Chuansha, Shanghai, banquets are only for matchmakers and relatives, and jiaozi is distributed among neighbors. There must be at least 4, more than 6, 8 or even 12 "plates" for the plate ceremony. The most important thing on the plate is jewelry for the future bride. Ordinary people use silver, and the middle class uses gold to call it "all gold and six gifts." What's more, those rich people use pearls, jade and diamonds, which are called "all-drilling six rituals". In addition to jewelry, there are flowers and plants, such as reincarnation, evergreen, tea and so on. , also sent to the dish. The first two are for blessing men and women to be auspicious and evergreen, and the latter is a relic of the ancient tea ceremony custom, because the ancients thought that "tea does not change its roots, plants and trees give birth to children", and when they got married, they took tea as a gift and took its meaning of "will not change". After the gift plate is delivered to the woman's home, except for the jewelry and flowers in the gift plate, the woman's home only receives half of other things, and the remaining half is returned to the man's home together with the clothes, shoes, hats and gold watch glasses. 1 ~ Two days before the bride's formal wedding, the bride's family held a "big dish ceremony", which is also commonly known as "taking clothes" and "bearing dowry" in Shanghai.

This is a happy event, but because the daughter is leaving her family, custom requires it to be sad. Especially in the rural areas of Pudong, the bride-to-be sits next to her sister-in-law and watches her sister-in-law sew the red and green quilt head for her dowry. After sewing, she used a large piece of satin quilt cover to make the quilt head and pillow into bedding, which was called "being taken". Then the parents gave the quilt head, clothes and materials in their daughter's dowry to the elder sister-in-law, and put them in boxes one by one to show that the elder sister-in-law knew what her daughter had taken from home. This is called "box filling". At this time, the mother and daughter began to embrace and cry. This is not a tearful cry, but a kind of crying singing, which is called "crying marriage" according to custom, and has a certain melody and content, and is called "crying marriage song" Such as: "My mom's baby, my parents don't listen to anything, I'm sorry for my baby …" "My mom, I'm going to someone else's house, and I can't be filial …" and so on. The "big dish gift" is for the man's family. The man's family is used to hosting banquets, inviting close relatives and friends, and saying "please pack wine" and "watch wine" to witness how much dowry the woman has. Then, the groom will go to his daughter's house to see her mother-in-law and send a banquet to thank her for her dowry.

However, in rural Pudong, this "Yue Bai" ceremony was held the day before the bride's family received the betrothal gift. The groom-to-be chose a "dish" filled with gifts such as cock, herring, pork leg, goose and dried fruit to go to her family, and the prospective son-in-law entertained the bride-to-be for tea, and then told her how many people there were in her family.

Dowry, how many ropes, horizontal bar, baggage, etc. Both are needed, because this is the day after the man is ready to pick up the dowry, not the gift from the woman's family.

In the rural areas of Pudong (especially Fengxian area), there are still many men who go to the woman's house to marry their dowry. Overnight, the woman's family has put all the dowry in the living room, just like holding an Expo, attracting neighbors to visit and show off their wealth. Here, the makeup has not been fully enjoyed. A group of young people (in pairs) who came from the man's house with a shoulder pole with the word "Xi" written on it and Kuang Luo have arrived at the woman's door and set off firecrackers to welcome the makeup. According to custom, the man's makeup man must obey the instructions of her father and brother at this time. For example, makeup tools should be placed in a fixed place: poles and poles are beside firewood in the yard, and Kuang Luo and baskets are placed in the yard. The custom is that at this time, the woman should express "anger" without makeup, while the man who welcomes makeup will constantly knock gongs and set off firecrackers.

Make up. "This will attract more audiences and satisfy both men and women. If so, about 1 ~ 2 hours later, the bride's brother got her sister's permission and began to make up: first go to the toilet, then bedding, suitcase ... At this time, the makeup receiver stood outside the door, and at most he could only step into the threshold to pick up his makeup, so as not to be suspected of "grabbing makeup". As for the toilet where one combs one's hair and makes up first, it is also called "tong tong" in Shanghai custom. In the old society, women gave birth at home, and children all gave birth in the toilet, so the toilet is an important thing to wish children and grandchildren a happy marriage. After accepting the betrothal gift, the boys can't stop running back all the way, and some will run east or south when they come out of their girls' homes. This is the so-called "taking dragons". Custom thinks it is so lucky.