Emotional counselor, female.
He is 176, working in a bank, and I am 162, working in a private enterprise. Both our families have houses in the city.
We met on an offline blind date, and both families were very satisfied. We have been together for almost half a year, and we have never talked about getting married.
Before dating me, I said that if I became his girlfriend, he would try his best to be nice to her everywhere. However, this is not the case in the communication. He said that if he got married, he could give the woman a bride price of 300,000 yuan, but he proposed that this 300,000 yuan should be bought.
He even asked me to buy him clothes and shoes on his birthday. Said his ex-girlfriend gave him a lot of things for his birthday.
I communicated with him, hoping that he wouldn't speak so directly, which would make me uncomfortable. I hope he speaks more tactfully. But he told me that he was joking. I don't think he respects me at all, which makes me sad.
I told him that I wanted him to disclose my identity in a circle of friends and let him flatly refuse.
He once told me that he wanted to have sex with me. I said that you didn't even want to make our relationship public, and I wouldn't do that. He said, I said, you had sex with your ex-boyfriend. Why didn't you have sex with him?
I find that I am becoming more and more insecure now. Excuse me, teacher, how should I face this feeling now?
Emotional mentor reply:
His directness is really unnatural. Once the other person gets angry, he makes fun of him. I don't like such a man very much.
If you want to improve your relationship and finally walk into the wedding hall, you need to do the following three things:
1. In the future, he will use this tone to directly make you do things that you feel uncomfortable. You should tell him directly to his face that you don't like this way of communication and express your inner thoughts in time.
The gift you bought for him need not be too expensive. You should learn to observe his life carefully. Buying what he needs in life is more meaningful than buying those expensive things, and it will also reduce the cost of your silence.
The reason why he doesn't want to disclose your identity in the circle of friends is because he thinks that your relationship is still in the primary stage and has not yet reached the level of publicity.
There is one thing you must not cross the line. Don't take the initiative to promote your relationship, your current state, and what his real thoughts are. You can communicate with him formally. Follow your true thoughts and continue to develop. Don't worry too much. The teacher wants you to be happier and happier.
Wen Jia's guide to love (learn more: niujinlianai00 1) has happiness and is with you.