Influenced by the western thoughts in Hong Kong and Macao in modern times, young men and women sometimes broke through the shackles of feudal ethics and pursued freedom of marriage. However, most marriages between men and women are still decided by parents and arranged in the traditional way according to the words of matchmakers. This is the so-called "blind date". The man's engagement is still antique. Before the woman got married, she sighed with her sisters of the same age for three nights, that is, she sang the feeling of parting to each other. On the day of leaving the boudoir, the dowry is sent to the man's house; The man sent gifts, pork, cakes, etc. At dusk, the man sent someone to greet the bride in a sedan chair. At this time, the woman's lovers and sisters came out to ask each other for money to benefit the market. When returning to the sedan chair, there are "maids" and "maids", or in some places, a pair of male and female chickens are married to them, commonly known as "offspring chickens" (the homonym of "chicken" and "good"), which means that the husband and wife are harmonious and the offspring are auspicious.
When the sedan chair arrives at the man's house, the groom and his family must avoid it, otherwise they will "bump their heads" and hate each other in the future. The groom can't meet until he drinks the bride's tea. After the bride changed her clothes in the new house, the "maid" helped her out of the hall, bowed to her ancestors, offered tea to the elders present, and the tea receiver gave the couple money or gold and silver jewelry in the name of "meeting the bride". Shi Gui also took the couple to a public temple to toast their new friends at the wedding reception, then went home to have dinner with the aunts and other ladies, and then went back to their room to rest. In the evening, the husband's family held a banquet for Lang's "dowry". At midnight, the waiter respectfully invited the groom back to his room to drink with the bride and eat rice in bed. Subsequently, a series of activities such as "handing over the house" and "playing with the bride" were carried out. On the third day of their wedding, the newlyweds return to their mother's house, and the groom worships his parents-in-law and ancestors in order to "return to the door in three dynasties."
Make love to songs
The marriage customs of farmers in Shatian water town are quite unique, and the marriage system and etiquette are mysterious and interesting. Most young people fall in love by singing. During the slack season, such as March 3rd and August15th, young men and women sang courtship songs on the boat in Tan Wei, Shatou, and asked each other their names, ages and addresses. When you meet the right person, you will give each other engagement gifts and choose the wedding date privately.
Male activity
After the wedding date is set, the man will spend two to three days celebrating. On the first day, I asked my relatives and friends to help me build a shed and a stove. In the afternoon, kill chickens and ducks to worship ancestors and eat "buried rice". The next day, "sitting in the high hall" (also called "sitting at night"), several straw mats were laid in the main hall, with relatives sitting on both sides, the groom sitting in the middle and the best man sitting around. In front of the groom, a kerosene lamp and two red wedding candles must be burned out at the same time, which indicates that a couple will grow old together.
Put a small basket of rice between the two candles, which is filled with oranges and orange trees that are "beneficial to the market", meaning that Ding and Cai are prosperous. Put a bamboo chicken as a marriage certificate. Sitting in the high hall ceremony, the first thing is to worship the seats. The groom spreads the new seats presented by his brother on the new bed, indicating that brotherhood is like intertwined straw mats and will never be separated. However, the straw mat given by the bride to the groom can only be laid on the ground to show that men are superior to women. The second is to worship the cash box. Every money box has a relative's name. The person with the money box gives the groom the name of the person who delivered the money box. The third is "climbing to the top", where the officiating person combs the bride's hair, puts on a wedding dress and a hat. In the process of combing, I also lamented: "One comb to the end, two combs with white hair and Qi Mei, and three combs with children and grandchildren." The host family will also cook a pot of dumplings (glutinous rice balls) for relatives and friends to eat, which is called "eating dumplings on the head", indicating that the newlyweds are sweet and complete. In the whole process of these three ceremonies, "Gaotangge" is used throughout, mostly meaning auspicious and festive. Sitting in the high hall is usually in the dragon and phoenix.