You can find a job first, and it doesn't require much, at least your existing income. In the meantime, find another job. If you are in a small county, you should consider doing something for yourself. There should be a great chance. That's another story. You should settle down first. Besides, you shouldn't always be afraid of this and that. This is unnecessary. People should live with dignity. Marriage is your business. You have the right to make a decision.