? I remember that when I was very young, probably only a few years old, I particularly liked the steamed buns sold on the West Street in my hometown. The steamed buns are freshly baked, steaming hot, with soft-shelled noodles. They are broken open with one hand, wrapped in the fried steak or ham, and smeared with their unique sauce. Their sauce is very delicious, and their specialty is hot. Swallowing saliva, I took one bite. It was hot and spicy, and my face turned red. I couldn't give it up. It was not too refreshing.

? To this day, I still crave it. At that time, every time I passed by West Street, I would always pester my grandparents to buy them, and there were often two. One was not enough to eat, but two made me full.

? Grandma doesn’t let me go very much, saying that every time I finish eating, I don’t even think about dinner. But my grandpa was very spoiled by me. He would buy it for me every time, but he would not eat it himself. He would just look at me kindly and tell me to slow down and not choke on my mouth. Grandma always told me that he would not listen. So at that time, I especially liked to pester my grandpa.

In spring, grandpa was digging soil in the field, and I was pounding mud on the ridge. In the summer, my grandpa was setting the net in the river, and I was fishing on the beach. In autumn, my grandpa collected firewood in the mountains, and I dug bird's nests in the trees. When I had free time in winter, my grandpa would take me to listen to operas, play chess, visit friends, visit relatives, and watch rows of wild geese flying south in the sky while the snow fell.

? One summer, the weather was very hot. At sunset, I accompanied my grandfather to collect shrimp nets on the river beach far away from home. As the sun set, my grandpa was riding me in his car. My stomach seemed to have smelled the aroma of steamed buns freshly baked on West Street. Go to West Street to buy steamed buns.

? Grandpa smiled and said to me, Wana, we will be home in a while, don’t go too far. Today, grandma will cook crucian carp soup for you. Haven’t you wanted to drink fish soup for a long time? I don't, I want it. At that time, my grandfather’s family was very poor and there was little meat. I was looking forward to the delicious fish soup, but all I could think of was the hustle and bustle of West Street in the distance.

? I was stubborn, but my grandpa couldn't resist me. As soon as the wheels of the car swung, he turned around and took me to West Street, chasing away the afterglow of the sunset. Because that day, my grandpa was wearing a swimming suit and only had one big pocket, which was filled with knives and line tools, but he happened to have no money. It happened, my grandpa told me about it. When I heard this, I knew there was no chance, so I started crying regardless, and the more I cried, the fiercer I became. When grandpa sees me crying, his heart softens. Don't cry, grandpa will find a way.

? I watched my grandpa staggering to the store, and I knew he wanted to get credit. But grandpa rarely asks for help because of the holiday season, and there are so many people in front of the store that he is embarrassed to ask.

? Later, grandpa asked me to wait for him here and not to wander around. He strode into the car and started flying. I knew he was rushing back to get the money. The already thin figure looked even thinner under the setting sun that day. The wind puffed up the white vest, making the sweat-soaked back even more dripping.

When I got home, grandma asked grandpa what he had lost, and he rushed back in such a hurry. Grandpa said nothing, just looked at me stupidly and smiled. The sunset that day was particularly bright, and it looked particularly red in the sunset sky, as if it had been dyed with ink.

? Grandpa was nearly sixty years old at that time. He was doing the hardest mud work on the construction site in front of his house every day, climbing high and low, exposed to the sun and rain. Foreign nails have been driven into my feet, and bricks have been smashed on my head, without any delay. He was very kind and righteous, soft-hearted, easy to talk to, and did not care about anything. He worked with acquaintances, and when the electric planer lost his thumb and index finger, he gritted his teeth and went to the hospital. Afterwards, the boss only paid the medical bills and that was it.

? So I always feel sorry for my grandpa. But God, no.

After the floating clouds say goodbye, the water flows year by year.

? In college, when I rushed back to my hometown to see my grandpa for the last time, he was already in the hospital bed.

? Grandpa could no longer speak. He lay hunched over on the hospital bed. He was so thin that he was only skin and bones. His whole body was as light as a thin piece of paper placed on the bed.

? The eye sockets are sunken, the ears may still be listening, and the lips are parched and cracked. I have been panting day and night, breathing unevenly.

? The time from when he discovered that the cancer was terminal to when treatment suddenly stopped working was too fast. Unacceptably fast. I couldn't help it anymore, stood in front of the hospital bed, cried loudly, and called my grandpa, but he didn't answer. His eyes were wide open, his nose was constantly inhaling, his withered fingers seemed to tremble slightly, but his eyes were red, and a few tears flowed out. I know that he wants to say that the little grandson he loves most in his life is back. My grandpa used to love me so much, but now he doesn’t even look at me.

That day, my scalp was numb, and for the first time I felt a kind of heartfelt fear and a deep sense of powerlessness. It was the spring and summer of 2017. This year, I am twenty years old. When I was three years old, my mother left me with my grandparents, and I was raised entirely by them.

? I have written before that my grandpa really influenced me too much, such as not smoking or drinking, being upright and upright, and not getting involved in trivial matters...

< p> ?Now, I have grown up too. Walking on the road alone, I have seen thousands of people. It looks like your hair, like your eyes, but it is not your face after all. The moon fell coldly on West Street last night, but now and in the past the moon shines brightly in its missing place.

On National Day, I returned to my grandma’s house and went to West Street specifically. However, today's West Street has long been in decline, and there are only a few pedestrians on the street. But the newly developed commercial street at the east intersection next door is in full swing, with red flags waving everywhere and busy traffic everywhere. I wanted to find the steamed buns that I had coveted throughout my childhood, but I couldn't find them anymore. I stood in front of Xinjie, looking at the golden and majestic plaque, and the bustling streets and fireworks, but my heart seemed empty.

? Every time I think of my grandpa’s life, I feel pain in my heart. My grandfather became an orphan at the age of ten. He grew up relying on the food of hundreds of families in the village. He lived alone in a thatched house despite the wind, rain, snow and frost. They are also uneducated, they do dirty and hard work, and they suffer all the hardships of life.

? Later, I was lucky enough to meet my grandmother. She didn’t dislike him and became a family with him. We have three children, but my mother and uncle are sick all year round. As my grandfather got older, he still had to work outside. He had been working hard all his life. Even the day before he fell ill, he was still helping others in the fields.

? Nowadays, the only thing I care about most is my grandma’s body. Grandma is already old. She is seventy years old. She is still planting crops and doing farm work in the fields. Just like in rural areas, many elderly people still have a heavy workload and are busy at home.

? I have always seemed to be an unlucky child, and I dare not ask for God's favor. However, I hope that my grandma will always be in good health, free from illness and disaster, and that I can earn a lot. A lot of money.

? One night when I came back, I had a dream.

In the dream, I came to a field with rice ears in bloom. The sun was bright, there were swarms of flying insects in the sky, and the ground was full of ripe crop fruits. The mudbirds are burrowing into the forest, a fox flashes through the trees, and there is an eagle swaying in the wind. Grandma’s kitten still sleeps in front of the door, and fish jump out of the creek that winds from the pond to the backyard of Grandma’s house. The branches of the small trees planted by my grandpa are ready for hanging bird's nests. There are still some white, yellow, and blue flowers in the garden that I can't name. I accompany my grandpa to work. He was in the fields and I was playing and running in the fields. I ran faster and faster, like an eagle spreading its wings in the sky, and like clouds, floating in the water waves, with the blue sky under my feet. Suddenly a strong wind blew, the leaves fell one after another, and the eagle flew away, bringing thunder in the sky.

? I know, it’s going to rain. The rain in summer is very fast and fierce. It always comes as soon as it comes, just like a memory.

? I looked at my grandfather who was working in the fields. He stopped and was waving to me, as if he was saying something to me anxiously.

? The rain started to fall, one drop, two drops... But I was very happy and ran to my grandpa like crazy.

The rain fell harder and harder, pouring on the field.

Grandpa’s figure was getting closer and closer...

Suddenly I stumbled and fell. In this piece of hard soil, my cheek hit the ground, and it hurt so much that I just wanted to hide in my grandpa's arms immediately, and cry loudly like I did when I was wronged when I was a child.

However, when he looked up, he was nowhere to be seen.

In that direction, there was only a new grave and the whispering sound of the wind. A dream holds the autumn wind.

After waking up, I found that the corners of my eyes were already wet. I know that what I lost will never come back.

? I want to cry loudly.

? But not: "You can't cry so hard and cry with your grandma and mother. In this family, you are already an adult." I still remember the day my grandpa was cremated and buried. , what my sister said to me while holding my hand.

? "You must be passionate about something." It's like what I said to my grandpa secretly on the day my little niece was born.

? I put on some clothes and went out to look at the sky.

When you look up, you will see a beautiful starry night.

? There is not a single cloud in the sky. The dark blue sky is full of stars, illuminating the people on the ground.

? Let them wash away the fatigue of running around during the day.

? Suddenly a weak star emitted a light that flickered on and off, as if it was looking at me from a distance and smiling.

The copyright belongs to the original author

The original author of Zhihu (not cold when blowing my face)

A very good story, tribute!