Not long ago, Lindsay's boss found her and told her that there was a vacancy in the position of supervisor now, and she planned to promote Lindsay. The boss wants Lindsay to make the annual work plan of the department at the weekly routine work meeting. Lindsay told her friend the good news at once. When my friend heard the news, he congratulated Lindsay and gave her some advice. At Monday's regular meeting, Lindsay proudly took out the PPT she had prepared for a week, but the boss actually said it was useless. After the meeting, the boss found Lindsay again and told her that the position of supervisor was decided by another person, that is, Lindsay's good friend. The boss reminded Lindsay of some mistakes in her past work, including her private dissatisfaction and complaints with her boss. Lindsay immediately realized what had happened. That's why Lindsay said categorically that she would never be friends with her colleagues again. So, should there be friendship between women in the workplace, or is it possible to breed friendship between people in the workplace?
Youyou 29-year-old media planning
I no longer believe in any feelings, relationships or friendships in the workplace. What is the workplace? To put it bluntly, it is the battlefield. Everyone is fighting for the same piece of pie. If you eat it, others will be hungry. If others eat it, you will be hungry. Hunger can make people do crazy things. If you want a girlfriend who tells everything, stay away from the workplace and find it!
Cora 3 1 year-old book editor
So far, I haven't made good friends with my colleagues in the same company. Although I also have colleagues who go to work for lunch, go shopping after work and on holidays, I will not talk to them like other friends, and I will try not to involve other colleagues or things that may be unfavorable to my job evaluation.
Mary is 25 years old and is engaged in advertising sales.
I was robbed of my advertiser by my best friend in the workplace. We used to stick together all day like schoolgirls. Although I am in the same company now, I hardly speak anymore. Therefore, we are always hurt by the people closest to us.
Feng Jingen's 28-year-old lawyer
Didn't the TV series Latent, which was hit hard on TV a while ago, cause some discussion? Many people think that "lurking" is actually something about the workplace. I don't think it's that exaggerated. It all depends on your judgment. Not everyone will betray their friends in front of interests. If your friends really use you or betray you, it is also your failure. Why didn't you find out earlier? How many people can hide as deep as a spy in a TV series?
Although not everyone in the workplace thinks that there is no girlfriend in the workplace, most people think that making friends with colleagues has certain risks, and there are indeed many people who stumble like Lindsay. But it's not easy to keep your distance from everyone. No matter where we go, we need a partner, which began in kindergarten, which is almost a woman's nature. Go to the toilet together, have a working meal together, and walk to the MRT station after work ... which makes us feel that we are not so weak. Moreover, when we encounter troubles at work, a friend from the same company can give you the comfort you want most, because she knows the specific situation. However, we should clearly realize that the company is not a real boudoir. It's not rouge powder, it's smoke. Sometimes, when we are impulsive and soften up a little, we will say a lot of things we shouldn't say. And at some point, these words will really become a time bomb. For example, your negative comments on your boss, such as those inappropriate transactions between you and your customers, such as your excellent ideas, and so on. So what can be done to make women have close friendship without being hurt safely?
Workplace girlfriends topic safety index
Topic 1, beauty topic, trend topic
During the break from work, it's harmless to exchange gossip about the stars you see online, which female star's face has undergone plastic surgery, which male star has cheated again, etc. Contributing your own unique methods and tricks to lose weight can effectively narrow the distance between each other.
Topic 2: Emotional topic and family topic.
How to define whether two women have established friendship is to see whether they have exchanged emotional stories. If you tell each other all your past emotional experiences, and the other party doesn't say anything about her relationship with her boyfriend. Then you should be careful! These topics are not so safe because there are some parts that you can tell your best friend, but they are definitely not what you want everyone in the company to know. For example, whether your sex life with your boyfriend is harmonious. Once your friendship breaks down, you will worry that everyone in the office will know how often you and your boyfriend do things, or something more private than that.
Topic 3: Work topics, including past work topics, current work topics and your future work topics.
Work is the first priority in getting along with colleagues, and teamwork spirit is a necessary professional accomplishment. Only through full and frank communication and exchange can the work be smoother. But also won a good popularity in the work, and sometimes get unexpected convenience. But pay attention to the facts. Some words are absolutely rotten in the stomach. For example, you were actually fired when you left your last company. Once the HR of your current company knows about this, the consequences will be very serious. Another example is that you hate your boss, he is a brainless guy or something, so you can only communicate with people outside the company. As for the fact that you are discussing with headhunters about going to other companies, it can be said responsibly that if you do, you will be kicked out of the house and then you can successfully jump ship.
Psychologists' comments:
The psychological needs of girlfriends come from the compensation and continuation of family ties and intimate relationships. Boudoir is an intimate relationship established by women in the process of adolescent psychological growth. It comes from the combination of the needs of individual self-shaping and seeking a sense of belonging in environmental adaptation. Girlfriend is also a companion and partner before a woman matures and goes to the family.
Young girls have just entered the workplace, facing the challenges and pressures in the new environment, it is easy to find emotional support to alleviate their anxiety and fear. However, there are also many people who are sad and miserable because of careless friends in the workplace.
Be extra careful when looking for bosom friends in the workplace. Compared with women who work in a relatively peaceful environment, finding bosom friends in a highly competitive workplace is like gambling. It is possible that your trusted friend is your competitor. It can be said that the more intense the competition in the workplace, the less likely it is to find intimate relationships. Utilitarianism is the first need in the competitive mode. In the utilitarian corporate culture, even if both female partners feel speculative, they may choose their own needs and forget their friendship in the face of workplace desires. In addition, some people will seek the sense of belonging and self-worth of their families in the company environment. At this time, the company is like a family model, and the boss is like a parent. Even close friends can be competitive. This mentality is to love and envy your friends and seek the approval of your parents (boss or superior). This kind of injury is not malicious in nature.
How do women protect themselves from "girlfriends" in the workplace?
Learning to grasp one's role in the workplace, gradually enriching one's independence and establishing appropriate behavior boundaries with colleagues are the umbrellas to protect oneself from "wrong feelings". Of course, there is no truth in the workplace. If you have very congenial and loyal friends, you can take care of each other at work to build trust, make friends and safely open your intimate boundaries.