The Best Humor and Funny Pieces
Pieces are particularly popular in real life, and it is not fashionable not to mention the last paragraph. The following is the best humorous jokes I compiled for you, for reference only, hoping to help you!
the best humorous joke 1
1. The gale is like a crazy lion roaring, making deafening sounds. The tree was painfully shaken by the wind and whined.
2. I pissed off my girlfriend again. It's no use apologizing. She angrily walked around the house: Hum! I want to buy an expensive thing! As soon as I heard it, it turned around! Spend money to eliminate disasters! Immediately say: ok! I'll go shopping with you. Then we went to the commodity market and bought a washboard.
3. Sleep is an art, and no one can stop me from pursuing art!
4. When you grow up, marry Tang Priest as your husband, play if you can, or eat him if you can't.
5. Doing well in the exam depends on sitting at the same table.
6. Breaking up is boring. Let's have a divorce if we can!
7. I am small-minded, but I don't lack it. I have a good temper, but I don't lack it!
8. You'd better let me kneel on the washboard. Kneeling on the electric heater is really unbearable!
9. Women like two flowers best in their life: one is to spend money, and the other is to spend as much as possible!
1. Two lovebirds with the same life, a pair of poor butterflies.
11. Who do you think you are? You are the spilled water. I don't even want a basin.
12. My grandmother said that I was born from my knee. As soon as my mother bent her leg, I was pushed out from her knee.
13. As the saying goes, if you laugh, the whole world laughs with you. You cry, and you are the only one crying in the world.
14, the so-called holiday, at home, go out without money, especially free every day.
15. People have lived their whole lives. Don't be too cold in winter, too hot in summer, don't pretend to be poor if you have money, and don't show off if you don't have money. Instead of frowning, you might as well steal to laugh. Friends often remember, and they are happy all their lives!
16. Stupid man+stupid woman = marriage; Stupid man+smart woman = divorce; Smart man+stupid woman = extramarital affairs; Smart man+smart woman = romantic love.
17. God said there should be light, but I said I opposed it, so there was darkness in the world.
18. I am a civilized person, and all the dirty words have been disinfected with saliva.
19. The face is a thing apart from the body, but whether it is necessary or not, money is a necessary thing, and it has to be.
2. The geography teacher asked: What are the four oceans? I answered: pleasant goat, beautiful goat, lazy goat, boiling goat
21. I am so tired that I want to make a cut on the back of my head, and then I collapsed on the ground to install a piggy bank.
22. When I see a beautiful woman, I first feel in my pocket to see if I have any money!
23. If I were a princess, I would save a frog, but all I met were toads.
24. There are two reasons why inviting a girl out to play failed. One is that she is too lazy to wash her hair, and the other is that your invitation is not worth washing her hair.
25, poor Nike, rich ADI, rogue Armani.
26. When you put on the wedding dress of love, I also put on the monk's cassock ...
27. I went to bed like a beast, specifically like a koala, and slept for 18 hours.
28. Mosquito, you have hands and feet. Why don't you get a job and live properly?
29. I will be friends with anyone who says I am white, thin and beautiful.
3. The teacher said that you can't eat snacks in class. Fortunately, I brought a hot pot today.
31. If I didn't love you, I wouldn't be so bored as to care about you.
32. What we didn't have time to say became our regret in each other's hearts.
33. Sometimes, things are very simple, and the complicated thing is your own head.
34, I may not love you, because having is the beginning of losing.
35. Say to those women who love me: You can love me all your life if you can.
36. You are my belief, which makes me inseparable from you!
37. People are not allowed to take money into the grave. But money can take people to the grave.
38. It's better to forget you than to be in a world you don't want.
39. You need to forget what you have lost, be grateful for what you have, and look forward to what is coming.
4. It's not that I don't want to play computer in the morning, but it's already noon as soon as I get up.
41. People's eyes are black and their hearts are red. Once jealous, the heart is black.
42. The person I trust most has taught me not to trust anyone easily.
43. You said that you can dance with me even if there is a cliff ahead, but that's just talk.
44. It takes thousands of years to change from a monkey to a human, and it takes only one bottle of wine to change from a human to a monkey.
45. I once picked up a candy and showed it to my dad. He said that he would try it first to see if it was poisonous, and I lost it!
46. Without existence, who will witness your shameless happiness?
47. Beijing Love Story Lin Xia said to the madman: I love you and it has nothing to do with you.
48. The night gave me a pair of dark black's eyes, but I rolled my eyes with them.
49. Lies are sweet words when they are said, and disgusting when they are punctured!
5. If you forget how to move forward, think about why you got here in the first place.
51, turn you into my bad habit, it is better to turn me into your good mood!
52. I have a dream since I was a child, that is, everyone in China will give me a dollar!
53. The people who can board my ship are either people I trust or people I love.
54. There is no moon in the Mid-Autumn Festival. Is there a clear night sky like your heart?
55. There will always be a moment when you think you are too strong to need anything.
56. There is no distance between points in the world, only the distance between hearts.
57. When I was a child, my parents always believed that the ugly duckling would turn into a white swan and then marry a rich woman. One day when I grew up, my father looked at me intently and said earnestly, "Son, you'd better study hard."
58. There is a person who taught you how to love, but he doesn't love you anymore.
59. Our English teacher and math teacher can form an invincible alliance.
6, people are not malicious, and they can't stand steadily! People are not damaged, not standard!
61. People are divided into groups, which is why my list is so beautiful.
62. I have been single for a long time, let alone unscrew the bottle cap. I can unscrew the fire hydrant.
63. Other girls can be gummy bears, angel babies and sweetheart babies. I can't. I have to be an aunt and a living ancestor.
64. Don't smile at me with your pirated Mona Lisa smile. My stomach is not as strong as you think.
65, a lot of things, between not being wronged and being melodramatic.
66. One of the people I hate most is those who are good at flattery and proficient in rhetoric, because staying with them will make me look like I don't know how to be a man.
67. When I came home from college holiday, my mother cooked me a good table. My father: Let go of eating and make yourself at home!
68. Two couples are chatting. Woman asked: Honey, people say that women in love will become stupid. Do you think I am stupid? Male affectionate style: Fool, you are so stupid, how can I think you are stupid?
69. If you don't look good, don't mess around. Some people spend a lot of money to iron delicate princess rolls, but they look like Newton instead of a princess.
7. When I have money, I will buy two lollipops, one for you to watch me eat and the other for you to eat.
71. A few months ago, I found the place where my wife put her money. Since then, I have always reached out and touched one or two pieces of change every month. Until yesterday I reached out and caught a cactus in it, and I knew it was time for me to stop.
72. The strength of science lies in that you can't understand the answers after copying them, and the strength of liberal arts lies in that you don't want to copy them after reading the answers.
73. I'll give you a pair of scissors when your hair reaches your waist.
74. Eating life is like a train. To sum it up, it is: shopping, shopping, shopping.
75. Don't panic when your life is unhappy. Look at your wallet and savings, just cry.
76. If you can appreciate my strangeness, you will be as lovely as me.
77. I will return all the heavy rains I missed in those years to you these days.
78. Smart girls are generally fatter, because the latest scientific research proves that women use adipose tissue to store their IQ. The thicker the adipose layer, the higher the IQ.
79. Never keep your eyes on the phone for too long. Experts said that the phone would be dead.
8. The first thing you wake up every day is to want to sleep. The best humorous jokes 2
1. Young, but not light in weight. The balance is not much, but I want to buy a lot.
2. I never doubt that you are a beauty, I just doubt my aesthetics.
3. Uncle policeman, I lost my bag. Don't worry, I'll take care of it. Then you can pay me back.
4. I said I liked Li Bai's poems better, and Lu You was so angry that my family couldn't surf the Internet.
5. Being so kind to you is not like you, because you may have been my pet pig in a previous life.
6. It is said that this is the state when the foodies are crazy: they enjoy it in their mouths and want to be thin in their hearts.
7. If you don't want to answer my phone, just say so. Don't always ask China Mobile to say sorry for you.
8. Quit smoking. If you smoke again, you'll be walking on clouds!
9. I advise you not to have plastic surgery, but it is more reliable to be reborn as soon as possible!
1. In this fickle age, the best way to make others remember you is to owe money and not pay it back! The best humorous jokes 3
1. I think the brightest smile in my life is probably dedicated to my mobile phone and computer screen.
2. Whether you are doing well or not is unknown to others, but as soon as you gain weight, everyone will know.
3. I don't mind that you lie to me. What I care about is that your lies can't fool me.
4. What do you mean, don't hesitate to die? It's about being pissed off 1 thousand times a day, but still not quitting.
5. After being with you for so long, I finally found that you look like a person.
6. I'm not a prince. Why do girls always think they should be a princess when they meet me?
7. Some people seem to be well-informed, but behind their backs they haven't even seen Peggy Piggy.
8. Those who are good-looking and like to eat are foodies, and those who are not so good-looking and like to eat are called gits!
9. I found a problem. I like talking to good-looking people. No wonder I always talk to myself.
1. am I your favorite person? why don't you talk?
11. Life is like breathing. Breathing is for breathing, and breathing is for fighting for breathing.
12. After the English listening test, I realized a truth: some words are only for people who understand.
13. If I hadn't beaten you, I would have turned against you.
14. Life is sometimes like a computer. If it crashes, it will crash, which is non-negotiable.
15. I really envy those who have stories. Unlike me, a word "handsome" can last a lifetime.
16. Don't expect to lose weight. Bajie has walked 18, miles without losing weight. Besides, he is a vegetarian.
17. Every time I buy a drink, I thank you for your patronage. One day, I suddenly couldn't write Huizi in the exam, so I opened the drink next to me. At that time, I was crazy. Have another bottle!
18. I envy those who can be with the people I like. Unlike me, I have long been surrounded by people who like me.
19. One day you will meet a good girl. She doesn't want your house, your car, your diamonds and your money, and of course she doesn't want you!
2. Every girl has a dress in her closet called: I once bought it as a poor dog, but now I think it is ugly. The best humorous jokes 4
1. Eating is to survive, so eating food is just a person with a particularly strong desire to survive.
2. Eating food means: whenever you know a new plant, you should also check its medicinal value and edible value.
3. Why do fools call themselves foodies?
4. As a foodie, the most terrible thing is not hunger, but that you are obviously not hungry, but you always feel that you have to eat something to be practical.
5. I lose weight, and the less I lose, the fatter I get.
6. Eating food always carries snacks with you, for fear that you will starve to death in the street at any time.
7. It used to be difficult for water in the sea. Fish-flavored shredded pork was served with chicken legs.
8. People are iron and rice is steel. Eating food is better than being crazy about goods.
9. No one has died since ancient times. Eat as soon as you can.
1. Gourmet, don't do this. Let me go. I want to lose weight.
11. Do you know what to lose weight for? Losing weight is to eat again.
12. Everyone else is full after eating two bites. I can still eat two bites when I am full.
13. There are only three things that can never be taken away by others: the knowledge you have learned, the dream in your heart and the food you have eaten. Therefore, I want to be a knowledgeable and ambitious foodie.
14. A foodie's life is like a train. To sum up, she can only be awakened by eating, eating, eating, eating, eating and eating.
15. Eat with skill and eat with tactics!
16, the so-called eating goods, when you are hungry, you are massive, and when you are not hungry, your mouth is awkward!
17. Eating food means that others are full after eating two bites, but you can still eat two bites when you are full.
18. For all foodies: I'm not hungry, but my tongue is too lonely.
19, drying the house, drying the car, drying the food and drying the love, that's nothing, and you can go out to bask in the sun at noon.
2. If your female partner is a foodie, marry her. As the saying goes: eating goods is good for feeding.
21. The real foodies dare to face the thick thighs and challenge the bulging abdomen.
22. I have a heart to lose weight and a stomach to eat food. They PK every day, and Emma's stomach won again today.
23. If you can only choose one person and food you like, how do you choose to eat? Eating food: eat the person you like!
24. In the circle of friends, some bask in objects, some bask in babies, some bask in beautiful scenery, some bask in delicious food, and they are full of happiness. I can only bask in the sun, but I am also very happy!
25. There is another kind of foodie in the world, either eating or eating upside down.
26. Real foodies never say: I'm full.
27, people are inherently mortal, or starve to death or support to death.
28. It is said that Chihuodu.