Happy, humorous and positive sentences (selected 42 sentences) 1. Smart girls are generally fatter, because the latest scientific research proves that women use fat tissue to store IQ, and the fat layer is thicker. The thicker, the higher the IQ. 2. From today on, as long as you are my friend, if you have no money, just let me know. I can tell you how I spent my days without money. 3. If a man has no partner, others will comfort him by saying that women nowadays have too high demands; if a woman has no partner, others will definitely say that her demands are too high. 4. Do you know why you have no partner? Because in this season of stockings, you are wearing a pair of long johns. 5. If you don’t feel energetic after sleeping for 8 hours, you will be a koala in your next life. You will sleep for 20 hours a day, eat for 2 hours, and be in a daze for 2 hours. This is the perfect life! 6. To conquer a woman, there are two necessary ways: one is to please her mother, and the other is to surpass her father. 7. You are financially poor, have a volatile personality, have colorful hobbies, and have a messy life creed. All of the above are true! 8. Mom: Which apple do you want? Child: The big one, the biggest one. Mom: Son, you should be polite. Want the small one. Child: Do you have to lie to be polite? 9. To judge whether a straight man is reliable depends on whether he can withstand the temptation of beauty. If he is still sitting in his arms, it means he has become bent. 10. I think I should lose weight. The last time I donated blood, a hundred milliliters of lard actually leaked out. 11. Not all single people are flirtable. Some people have no hope of falling in love and just want to get rich quietly. It is better to get out of singlehood than to get rid of fat, and to get rid of fat is not as good as to get rid of poverty. The only way to relieve worries is to get rich suddenly. 12. A veteran in words but a coward in behavior. Even though some people drive cars every day, they have never even held a girl’s hand, like me. 13. What if a person doesn’t want to go anywhere, doesn’t like to go anywhere, doesn’t want to play with anyone, and is annoyed by everyone? He is either sick or has no money. 14. The difference between a lie and an oath is that one is taken seriously by the listener, and the other is taken seriously by the teller. 15. Every man can water his flowers with his girlfriend’s fairy water, but he can only water it once in his life. 16. Every girl who is 1.6 meters tall has the ambition to find a man who is 1.8 meters tall. 17. I advise you all to stop playing with mobile phones and computers. Recently, I feel that my eyesight is getting worse and worse. I can’t even see money when I open my wallet. 18. It’s getting cold. Do you all have boyfriends? If so, give me one. 19. Why do you want to chase stars? ?Because Kuafu who chased the sun died, and Chang'e who chased the moon was imprisoned in Guanghan Palace. For the safety of my life, I can only chase stars. ? 20. Ask your male friends to respect the gays around you, because they will save you two girls! 21. Sometimes I feel that I have become ugly. When I take out my ID card, I find that I am worrying too much. 22. There is an embarrassment: when I go to the supermarket and go out empty-handed, I am always worried that others will suspect me of stealing something. 23. I went to a restaurant that day and ordered rice noodles, but the boss asked me: Should I take it away or take it away? Boss, can’t I eat it here? 24. As a senior female bachelor, others advise me: "Why don't you just become religious? That way you can still have a master?!" 25. My mother came to the city to visit me yesterday. Her hometown is in the countryside and she has rarely seen the outside world. After I had just been out for a while, I called him and said excitedly: "The mice here are so stupid that they won't run away when they see people. I'll slap them to death as soon as I slip on my shoes." ?I went back and saw that the hamster, which I had raised for almost a year, was on its back. 26. The air purifier is the most pretentious home appliance I have ever seen, especially like those of us who pretend to listen to lectures in the classroom. 27. The world is so big, I want to see it. ? With such a small wallet, let me see how far you can go. 28. The world is desperate. When I typed "men's short skirts" into a search on Taobao, it really happened. 29. I met an old man carrying something on the road. I wanted to go up and help him carry something, so I casually said: "Old man, let me help you carry it." ? 30. What do you think about plastic surgery? ?Artificial beauty may not be as good as natural beauty, but artificial beauty must be better than natural ugliness. ? 31. The best thing in the world is none of my business! 32. I finally understand why you have to lick Oreos first, because then no one will grab them. 33. As an optimistic person in the eyes of others, it is probably because you are hanging and about to die, and everyone thinks you are swinging on a swing. 34. Time is the best teacher, but unfortunately, he killed all his students in the end. 35. When life doesn’t go your way, don’t panic. Look at your wallet and savings and just cry. 36. When God closes a door for you, he will always leave many unlocking phone numbers on the wall for you. 37. Lu Xun once said: As long as you spend money regularly, you will lose 80% of your worries, your EQ and IQ will improve, and you will not fall in love with fire, but where will the money come from? Lu Xun didn’t say anything! 38. Even if the whole world opposes it, I will stick to my dream. Who are you, you, to deserve the whole world’s turn to oppose you? 39. There was gold under a man’s knee. I cut off the entire leg and couldn’t even find a piece of copper! 40. Mom said: Even if you are jealous, you have to act like you’ve drunk soy sauce. Don’t let others look down on you! 41. Pigs have pig thoughts, and humans have human thoughts.

If a pig had human thoughts, it would no longer be a pig, but Bajie! 42.What is the head teacher? Just one person who will completely destroy your friendship! Destroy your love again! The terrorist who won’t let go of your family affection!