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After the birthday party, Xiao S sent a video and cried. Some people say that her marriage is unhappy, and even point the finger at it because she gave birth to three daughters.

In Taiwan Province province, as well as Fujian and Guangdong provinces in China, they still maintain extreme contempt for their daughters and attach great importance to their sons. Based on this, a group of netizens thought and gave birth to three daughters in a row. Should we refuse them well?

Traveling to Xiamen, I met a pair of young parents about our age on the train, with a son, a daughter and two old people.

Their son is older, seven or eight years old, and their daughter is similar to us. I'm over three years old. Several children soon played together.

All the way down, my daughter secretly told me that the aunt was a bad mother.

I was speechless and didn't know how to explain it to my daughter.

The incident was caused by several children playing. The girl and her brother competed for the snacks my daughter took. Mother dragged the girl down from the bed, threatened to beat her, and was still yelling, you lose money, why are you so shameless?

And that little brother, who is a few years older, is not moved at all, just eating as usual.

It is not difficult to see that the younger girl, who is also two children, has not received extra care and love in this family.

The girl went to pee several times. Even at night, she doesn't call her mother, but drags her shoes. When sleeping, my little brother sleeps alone in the middle bunk, and the girl sleeps at her mother's feet in the lower bunk. Mother just fell asleep by herself, and the little girl, alone, won't fall asleep until after midnight.

All this is really hard to understand in the eyes of my beloved daughter.

The next morning, two elderly aunts talked with us in some poor Mandarin.

What they are most curious about is, are you the only girl? How can girls be so spoiled? They will never get married again.

I looked at my husband over and over again with my eyes, as if his actions to pamper his daughter made them feel incredible.

Hearing that we only have one child and don't want any more, they shook their heads and began to speak in a dialect we didn't understand.

Later, my little mother told us that their hometown is Zhangzhou, Fujian, and girls don't have to study. Only a few families will send their daughters to school. Therefore, girls have no place there. This seems to explain her previous behavior.

During that trip, we also made a detour to Shantou, which was my husband's former home. My husband married a local girl in Shantou. Like us, there is only one girl.

Fortunately, their parents-in-law in Northeast China take care of their children without regrets, and they also love their granddaughters and take care of their daughters-in-law.

Talking about some differences between the two places, my husband's mother also told us that the local people have a serious preference for boys. Daughter-in-law's house is no exception. He not only looks down on his daughter, but also pays little attention to her.

Fortunately, although the baby girl doesn't have the love of her grandparents, she has the wholehearted love of her parents and grandparents.

A trip reminded me of the concept of "son preference" that I almost forgot. Those old ideas that I thought should disappear with time are still regarded as classics by many people today in the 2 1 century.

In fact, I was born in a family with the idea of "son preference".

I am the first child of the Li family. When I was born, my grandfather only asked outside the window, boys and girls? After hearing the girl's answer, turn around and leave.

And in my whole childhood, I hardly got grandpa's attention. With the arrival of two aunts and two boys, my position in the big family has gone from bad to worse.

No matter grandparents or second aunt, the most common name for me is girl film. Whether it is a red envelope or a delicious snack, it has nothing to do with me.

My uncle bought me a small toy because he was grateful to his parents for often helping him, and was scolded by my grandmother for a few days.

For these reasons, my grandparents and I have never been close.

Then my uncle finally gave birth to a boy. Grandpa, who I thought never laughed, finally smiled with his grandson in his arms. His grandson scratched blood on his face. Also smiled and boasted: Look at my eldest grandson, how capable he is.

And every time grandpa wants to find trouble with his father, the most common sentence is "there are three unfilial, and none is great."

It is because of this sentence that I hung on my father's head like a shackle, and three girls were born in our family.

Although, parents didn't despise us because any of us were girls. Even when my uncle objected to my study on the grounds that I was a girl, my father argued.

However, because of family planning, the two sisters were raised outside for many years before they could return to their parents. Second sister was even sent for several years.

This is the harm that family planning has brought to my two sisters, and it is also the poison that the patriarchal ideology has brought to them.

Do you particularly want to know what happened when our family gave birth to three daughters?

With the encouragement of my parents, I changed my fate by reading. Going out of the countryside and entering the city, I have a stable job, a loving husband and a beloved daughter.

My two sisters also stayed in their favorite cities after graduation, and had loving husbands or boyfriends.

And my parents followed us to settle in the city, got their own house and lived a happy life that was unimaginable before.

Similar to my family, there is a menstrual family that gave birth to three daughters and finally gave birth to a son. In order to have a son, my uncle even lost his job as a teacher. Life used to be hard.

However, with the daughters growing up and standing in the city on their own, the three sisters not only helped their younger brothers, but also took their parents to live in the city.

It was the three sisters who pooled their money to pay the down payment and bought a house for their younger brother.

Now, my mother often thinks that three daughters are three treasures. If three sons were born here, my life now is really unimaginable.

And those aunts who usually play with their mothers often say with envy: how wonderful! You have three small cotton-padded jackets. How lovely the daughter is!

My aunt and uncle in my hometown, each family has a boy. The boy who once made them very proud now asks them to help the whole family.

Two aunts' younger brothers stayed in their hometown and followed in their father's footsteps. One was a doctor and the other was a businessman. Although life is good, menstruation people can only look up to city life despite their rich families.

My uncle's brother went to college. After graduating from college, with the help of his whole family, he made a down payment and bought a house in a big city. But only enough for a young couple.

Therefore, uncles and aunts still have to stay in their hometown and continue to struggle to help their younger brothers save more money and solve some practical problems.

I saw all my relatives, almost all of them are girls' homes. Parents followed their daughters to the city, no matter whether they were second or third. Lead an old age.

And a family with boys, even if there is only one, is still a day of struggle.

I think this is probably the reason why the Northeast people have gradually given up the idea of "preferring sons to daughters" in recent years!

High housing prices and more financial demands for boys' parents are powerful weapons to break the concept of son preference.

Speaking of small S, many people may think that it is precisely because of the worry-free economy that there should be a boy who inherits incense.

Even Huang Lei, who has always been known as a good man, gave birth to a son after his wife gave birth to two daughters.

The meaning given to boys has both inheritance and responsibility. It is the continuation of the family and the spirit.

In the past, they were symbols of physical strength and power. Today, it is the successor of the mantle, the legitimate owner of huge property, and the best hope for a family.

What happened to that girl? They are too weak to support their families. You have to be married all the time, and it is an accessory in the family.

But is this really the case?

Girls, apart from being physically weak, can you say that their IQ and career achievements must be inferior to others?

For example, in Ode to Joy, are there many girls who like Qu Xiaoyu? Is a daughter like Qu Xiaoyu really better than that disappointing brother?

The daughter's caution is often the master of the family in a small family. This is also the reason why more and more parents will become attached to their daughters.

Boys are extroverted and can always grasp the overall situation in the family. This is also the reason why many sons' parents are unwilling to become attached to their sons. Because the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not good, I am afraid that my son will be embarrassed.

Of course, these are trivial matters, and any family will have its own unique mode of getting along.

What I want to say is that having a daughter doesn't mean having a son is not good.

However, when we talk about other people's lives, we should actually understand what is right and what is wrong.

Sooner or later, those wrong ideas will be drowned by the torrent of time. Don't cling to the tail of these era residues!

I believe that no matter how Xiao S will live in the future, her three daughters will always be the most beautiful treasure given to her by God.

And you and I should also cherish the life that God has given us.

Li muyao

The writer circle signed the author;

Real name Li Lingling, born after 80;

Writing is a beautiful thing, just for the sake of mood.