Funny copywriting in friends circle (selected 64 sentences) 1. I am not a simple and thrifty person. I just have no money! My parents tried their best to save money for me, and they were reluctant to eat or drink. In fact, my family conditions are very good, so I asked my parents why, and my mother said, you are ugly, and only when you have more dowry can someone want it! 3. All along, the four spiritual pillars supporting my life progress are: waiting for work, waiting for Friday, waiting for express delivery, waiting for salary. I have two questions. The first one is: why does it hurt when you accidentally bite your tongue, but it doesn't hurt at all on purpose? Second: Why bite your tongue now? Xiaoming is sitting in front of his house eating ice cream. Not far away, a little boy in rags was watching him eagerly, drooling. Xiaoming sympathized with him and beckoned the little boy to come over. Then he handed him a bench and said, come, sit and watch! ? 6. I quarreled with my mother, and my words were a little extreme. She regretted it when she finished, but she still said calmly, okay, stop arguing and do whatever you want. After all, it was my fault first, and it was my fault that you became like this. ? 7. Some people will eat hard when they are unhappy. Unlike me, I eat hard when I'm unhappy. 8. After you get married, if the groom is not me, I will move next door to your house and treat your children better than my own until your husband doubts life. 9. My wife asked me: If a female colleague seduces you, will you listen? I smiled and shook my head, ha ha, who do you take me for? Am I the kind of person who will tell you what you really think? 10. In the past, doctors would happily say to pregnant women: Congratulations on your pregnancy. ? Now the doctor will say:? You're pregnant. Do you want to have children or not? ? This is the change of the times! 1 1. I save three times a day, eat less, shop less and use less. 12. A child was sitting at the door playing, and a middle-aged man asked him: Is your father at home? ? The child replied:? Are you home? The middle-aged man rang the doorbell for a long time, but no one answered the door. So the man asked angrily:? Why not open the door? ? The little boy replied:? I don't know, this is not my home! ? 13. My friend invited me to dinner at noon. When I paid the bill, I saw him paying slowly, so I said? Why don't I take it out? ? How dare you! ? Is it okay? So I put my hand in his pocket. 14. If you think the person you like likes you, it only shows that you have a rich imagination. 15. Why don't I have a stunning deskmate, but my deskmate does? 16. I can only know two things in my life: one or the other. 17. I have the ability to pick up girls, but I am a sister. 18. I have been afraid of the dark since I was a child. I didn't study well when I was a child because I was afraid to look at the blackboard. 19. Born down and out, five elements are short of money. At school, we are the richest man on Monday, a local tyrant on Tuesday, a civilian on Wednesday, a poor man on Thursday and a bankrupt on Friday. 2 1. Skipping class is a carnival for one person, and attending class is the loneliness of a group of people. 22. I don't want to buy a house, so I can buy it if I want? 23. You must scold me, because you don't know me well enough, because everyone who knows me wants to hit me. 24. When I was a child, I wrote essays to help the elderly. Now think about it, how brave I am! 25. I've been really busy recently, and it's hard to guarantee even one 16 hours' sleep! 26. Traveling means going from a place where you are tired of living to a place where others are tired of living. 27. I advise you, don't hang yourself on another tree, try several times on the next tree. 28. I feel like two pigs, because one pig can't describe your stupidity. 29. Doctor, please give me some regret medicine and a glass of forgetfulness water. 30. I think your menopause is not only advanced, but also accelerated. 3 1. Special people never say that they are special, such as me. 32. Don't expect to lose weight. Bajie has walked 108000 miles without losing weight. Besides, he is a vegetarian. 33. Li Bai, your wine brought me 300 Tang poems. 34. I wanted to turn around and smile at the male god, but I didn't expect it to be too cold and my nose was running with laughter. I would rather be sad than happy. 36. Who feels the same way about me? Are you so determined about RMB? 37. Although I don't have many ways to make money, I have many ways to give. 38. The happiest thing is to lie on my desk and wait for class to end, and wake up after school. 39. hooligans are not terrible, but they are afraid that hooligans have culture? 40. I not only have a car, but also do it myself? 4 1. Life cannot be like cooking. Prepare all the ingredients before cooking. 42. My love for you is like peeing in the middle, and I can't hold it. 43. Being in a daze, well done, is called deep. If you don't do it well, you may fall asleep. I only drink pure water when I drink water, and pure milk when I drink milk, so I am very simple? In English class, the teacher asked us to read the word apple, and the whole class shouted tacitly? iphone？ . 46. In the morning, the alarm clock started to go crazy, the quilt suddenly hugged me, the pillow sang me a lullaby, and then I fell asleep. 47. God didn't give me much responsibility, but it still made me heartache and tired. As long as you want it, as long as I have it, I won't give it to you, no matter what. 49. I fell asleep when I dropped my cell phone in the middle of the night, so I picked up my slippers! 50. The north wind is blowing, and the autumn wind is cool. If you have any difficulties, I will help you. I live next door. My name is Wang. 5 1. Stupidity is contagious. Stay away from me. I'm witty. 52. Good-looking people have youth, and we only have universities. 53. Only after the English listening test that year did I understand a truth: some words are only for people who understand. 54. I belong to Shenyang before drinking, and Shenyang belongs to me after drinking. 55. My period is like a wolf. When I leave, I always shout, I will definitely come back. 56. Every time you press the home button on your mobile phone card, it's like giving your mobile phone CPR. 57. When I am angry, you must coax me, buy me food, and I will kill you when I am full. 58. I finally got used to my appearance, got a haircut and changed my ugly method. 59. Life is like fighting the landlord. One is a gang and the other is an enemy. 60. I said I liked Li Bai's poems better. Lu You got angry, and then my family couldn't surf the Internet. 6 1. Don't panic when your life is not satisfactory; Looking at my wallet and savings, I cried. 62. Why fall in love? Isn't the mobile phone fun? Or is the essential balm not easy to use? 63. With a book in your left hand and a lighter in your right hand, you can't point anywhere! 64. Match more boys and girls in the class, so that you can save half the money in the future.