The way of marriage management, marriage is a game between two couples, and there must be a willingness to fight and a willingness to accept. This kind of marriage life is mostly beautiful, but some friends pay too much but can't get the feelings they want, often quarrel and even divorce. Marriage is a school. If you want to manage it well, you must know the method. Below I have sorted out the relevant ways of marriage management for you. Let's study together.
The Way of Marriage Management 1 In fact, in the real life of husband and wife, many women are independent at the beginning, and it is not necessary for many female friends to be raised by men. In many cases, this idea will only come into being after being with her husband. When men make out, they usually say something that I will take care of you in the future, and women are naive enough to believe it.
When you start to depend on your other half financially, someone will start to pay for you in your life, and gradually make you form the habit that all your life obligations are borne by another person, which will make you much more relaxed, but your other half will accept the obligations of two people or even a family, which is likely to be overwhelmed in the long run.
Without a job, it means that you have lost the opportunity to contact the society, which means that your thoughts and all your cognition were accumulated before marriage and have not been updated for a long time. This will cause many of your ideas to be out of touch with society and even your partner, which will eventually lead to more and more contradictions between you.
At the same time, your partner has been constantly improved in his work, and his value will be higher and higher, while your value will gradually depreciate with time. There will be fewer and fewer topics between you, and then you realize that economic independence will cost you more than just your job.
And if there is an argument in the process of getting along with you, your situation is very dangerous. Because you have no financial resources and all expenses come from each other, you may have to please each other to ensure your daily expenses.
In addition, as a wife, you don't have a stable source of income. Everything about you belongs to him in the eyes of the other party, and he earned it hard. So everything you give him, in fact, he will see it as something he gives himself indirectly, so you can't surprise him with your efforts, and you slowly lose your charm in front of him.
Men don't care about money and the cost of living with women, but that doesn't mean they don't care about endlessly bearing all the expenses for you. Because you are independent when he loves you, and you are his wife when he loves you, so don't resign casually, don't be divorced from society casually, and don't pin your hopes on a man for a lifetime.
You don't need to force yourself to be a strong woman. You just need to be able to support yourself. You can pay your own expenses without relying on others. Don't buy small things, don't ask your husband for money, and even buy gifts for your husband with his consent. This lifestyle is as lonely as being unmarried.
The Way of Marriage Management 2 There is a clip in the TV series "Nothing at Thirty": An aunt, dressed simply and carrying a big black shoulder bag full of vegetables, went to a luxury store to buy jewelry and chose the most expensive one.
1 tens of thousands of high-end custom jewelry! It's as simple as that. She thought the money in her pocket was only enough to buy food, so she really bought it by credit card.
She said: My husband and I started from scratch, sold fast food, grilled mutton kebabs, opened a taxi company, bought land in the mountains and opened an orchard, with a net worth of tens of millions.
Until last year, high-speed rail construction took two plots of land from us, and that compensation made us completely financially free.
Then, my husband brought back the woman he raised outside and wanted to divorce me.
When that woman stood in front of me with a famous brand and was well maintained, I looked at myself. ...
Yes, she doesn't know how to maintain, and she doesn't have a famous brand. The only bag she can get is a gift from her husband on her wedding anniversary. Reluctant to spend money, buy canvas-wrapped dishes and wear double-star shoes when traveling.
Is this why her husband cheated? Looking at the aunt in the play, she smiled with emotion and recalled that she didn't hate her ex-husband, but only blamed herself for not taking care of herself, which gave people a chance.
Therefore, she will take the divorce money to buy millions of jewels, which she never thought of before. Is it stupid? Or impulsive consumption? What the hell was she thinking?
They are a poor couple, struggling all the way, one thinking of finally coming through thick and thin, while the other is enjoying the fruits of two people, but they have already let go of each other's hands and made their own small plans.
Watching this wife cry and laugh, I really don't deserve her. But looking at her smile, I feel that she used to be happy.
She is happy when she devotes herself wholeheartedly to her family. It's a pity that she is so great that she forgot the selfishness of human nature and completely lost herself when she dedicated herself to her family.
She is not stupid. She just wants to put an end to the past, including the past, good and bad. She only remembers what moved her, only love, not hate.
I shared a true story around me before:
Cousin is almost 40, and the mother of two children looks 30 years old, envied by relatives and friends, and envied by colleagues and girlfriends. But recently my cousin wants to divorce her anyway.
Cousin plays cards in the beauty salon when she is free, for fear that the oil smoke will hurt her skin. Brother-in-law cooks at home and orders takeout for the whole family when brother-in-law is away.
Brother-in-law is so busy that he doesn't want to have a hot meal when he goes home. He really felt wronged.
He said: I just want to eat, work and live the life that ordinary people should live. ...
A friend left a message saying: It is rare for a woman to be as beautiful as a flower, but also to be diligent and keep a house. Many women have ruined their previous image for their children and families after marriage.
Isn't this the aunt who spent millions on jewelry above? In these two cases, one loses himself and forgets himself; A person who ignores others and is too self-centered. So what are we going to do in marriage?
Zhihu has a craigslist: How do smart women run their own marriages?
One of the highly respected answers is: while a woman is virtuous, never give up on herself for the sake of her family, and don't forget to improve herself. Your self-esteem and self-love are much more important than virtue. You should know that you are a man's wife, not a man's nanny.
For the above answer, I think we can split the following points for reference:
1, marriage needs * * * to operate together, not a blind effort, a complete acceptance, but a hand in hand towards the goal of * * *;
2. Marriage needs proper weakness, no one is decathlon, and proper weakness attracts the attention of the other half, which is conducive to enhancing the relationship between husband and wife;
3. Marriage needs a strong individual, who has the ability to live a single life, control his own life at any time, and be financially independent.
Life is not long. When people reach middle age, they should be sonorous roses, take care of themselves and manage their marriage well. * * * Encourage!