Wonderful and funny dialogue

Dear friends:

Hello!

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1. A three-year-old boy took the hand of a three-year-old girl and said, I love you. The little girl said, can you be responsible for my future? The little boy said: Of course! We are no longer one or two years old.

2. Two counterfeiters inadvertently made counterfeit banknotes with a face value of 15 yuan, and they decided to spend them in remote mountainous areas. When they bought a 15 yuan candied haws with 0 yuan, they cried and the farmer gave them two 7-dollar ones.

3. I said, "You are a pig." You said, "I am a pig!" " From now on, I will call you a pig. Finally one day, you can't help yelling at me in front of everyone: "I'm not a pig!" "

4. A drunk accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by to watch, and a policeman came over: What's the matter? Drunk: I don't know. I just got here, too.

A shy boy finally got up the courage to ask his beloved girl: What kind of boy do you like? The girl said: hit it off. The boy asked the same question again and had to say sadly, can't you have a flat head?

6. When the nurse saw a patient drinking in the ward, she went over and whispered to him, "Sweetheart!" The patient smiled and said, "Little baby."

7. In junior high school math class, the teacher talked about equation transformation. He rolled his sleeves on the podium and shouted: Attention, students! I'm going to change! ……

8. One day, a fly mother and son had lunch together.

The son asked the mother fly, why do we eat shit every day?

Mother fly said angrily, don't say such disgusting things when eating, eat while it's hot! !

9. Have you eaten? Please receive the short message. The elephant put shit in the middle of the road, and an ant just passed by. Looking up at the misty mountain peak, it couldn't help singing: Alasao, this is the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau! ~~~~

10. Female: "What do you think is cute about me?"

Man: "You are special."

Woman: "How special?"

Man: "Of all the men in the world, you only love me!" " "

1 1. This is a Chinese exam topic for primary school students.

Requirements: Connect the following four sentences with related words:

1, sister Zhang Haidi is paralyzed;

2. Sister Zhang Haidi studied tenaciously;

3. Sister Zhang Haidi learned a lot of foreign languages;

4. Sister Zhang Haidi studied acupuncture.

(Note: The correct answer should be: Sister Zhang Haidi, although paralyzed, studied hard, not only learning many foreign languages, but also learning acupuncture. )

As a result, a child wrote:

Although Zhang Haidi's elder sister stubbornly studied acupuncture and many foreign languages, she was still paralyzed.

Later, found more fierce children wrote:

Sister Zhang Haidi not only learned a foreign language, but also learned acupuncture. She studied so doggedly that she was finally paralyzed.

Sister Zhang Haidi is paralyzed, because she studies hard, not only learning a lot of foreign languages, but also learning acupuncture.

Sister Zhang Haidi studied very tenaciously, not only learned a lot of foreign languages and acupuncture, but also learned paralysis at last.

Sister Zhang Haidi learned a lot of foreign languages and acupuncture, and was paralyzed by tenacious study.

Sister Zhang Haidi learned a lot of foreign languages and acupuncture through tenacious study. As a result, she paralyzed herself according to a foreign language version of acupuncture book.

Slip of the tongue:

12. I once went to buy mutton kebabs.

Hold out four fingers and say "three kebabs" to the boss.

The boss received "How much?"

I held out three more fingers and said "four" ...

13. Our general manager's surname is Zhou. I was driving as soon as he called. When I get nervous, I say, "Premier Zhou ..."

14. My parents quarreled, and my father said angrily, "I'll go out!"

15. I play basketball in high school. After A got the ball, I selflessly passed it to B, and B scored easily. After a while, B got the ball, A shouted to pass it to him, but B threw it himself. As a result, A shouted angrily: I was really blind just now. ...

16. Don't engage in porcelain making without a golden hoop.

17. I just went to college for military training. The company commander didn't know where the accent came from and shouted the password-"Drill to the left!" "Drill to the right!"

18. When cooking at noon, my mother gave me a pot of carrots: "Go, cut the carrots into diced meat!"

19. I have a classmate who has been reviewing the computer level 3 exam. One day, while playing football, another classmate took the ball to the bottom line and only heard him shout: Enter! Get back in the car! (in the middle)

A colleague asked me yesterday. How to write festivals? I replied: add a festival section under the grass prefix and remove the grass prefix! All the staff burst into laughter! I haven't reacted yet ~ ~ ~ ~!

2 1. Boss, do you have a toilet paper hunger card?

22. In a meeting, the manager usually says to smokers: All smokers are strangled! !

23. There are so many beauties in Jiangshan, and countless heroes shoot eagles. . . . . .

24. A teacher plays mahjong all night. Seeing that the blackboard had not been wiped, he was furious: "Who is sitting in the village today?" Don't clean the blackboard! "

25. Tigers don't send cats. You think I'm dying!

26. A KTV, ordering songs, and a MM shout: Give me a stick-cut "Double Jay Lun" every week. ......

27. Obviously, you are calling from home. As soon as I opened my mouth, I asked, "Dad, where are you?" The parents on the other end of the phone froze. Answer: "I am at work!" "

28. A classmate argued with me and was at a disadvantage for a while. In desperation, he got up and shouted, "You're talking nonsense, I'm not stupid!"

I am the most honest person, and I never lie, except this sentence.

30. People are not smart and bald.

3 1. You are electricity, Li Siguang, and you are the only myth!

32. I always wander between cow A and cow C.

There are so many people who despise me. Who are you? !

34. When weeding in the afternoon, bow your head and shoot a big carving.

35. Two farmers play pigs

36. Kill the birdman and I will become an angel!

37. Live well, because we will die for a long time! !

We should keep quiet when listening to the sermon in the church. It is impolite to disturb others' sleep.

39. I refuse to obey anyone when I am drunk, so I hold the wall.

40. If you have read all the above, I can only say sorry for wasting your time. ....