Married men's attitude towards confidantes and their love life are also topics that everyone will pay attention to. Everyone will deal with their love life in a different way. The attitude of the following married men towards confidante.
Married men's confidante mentality 1 mentality 1: Men all have the mentality of "eager to be understood".
Some psychological researchers have summarized this point. Under the strong appearance, men always have a particularly vulnerable side.
Once a man has a weak side, he will long to be cared for. This concern is not protection, but more understanding and support.
I have seen such a classic case.
A hardworking husband, he is conscientious and tireless. But his wife never understood him, and even sarcastically said that he could not make money, and no other husband could do it.
This man is also very angry. Later, he met a woman who understood him. It is not easy for others to understand him, and he also has admiration. As a result, the man chose to divorce and married this woman who forgave him.
Why don't men like wives who make do with life? Not because his wife is bad, but because a wife who makes do with life can't understand her man after all.
The greatest advantage of confidante is that it can understand men's difficulties and make men particularly moved.
Mentality 2: Men want to be "appreciated".
Compared with women, men's vanity is generally reflected in the satisfaction of "achievement". The vanity of women is generally reflected in showing off "clothes and jewelry".
Men's achievements can be divided into spiritual achievements, career achievements and economic achievements.
However, men have too many achievements to share with people around them. Even the joy of achievement, they can't be known. Why? Because lovers are hard to find and bosom friends are hard to find.
For example, this person did a project today. Will the wife think this is not a normal thing? A confidante will think that he is really great, hardworking and worthy of praise.
What's the difference between the two sides? The difference is that the former does not appreciate the advantages of men, while the latter makes men feel particularly warm. In contrast, men will long for a confidante.
Appreciating a person, seemingly simple, is actually particularly difficult. Because not everyone has the character of "appreciating others". Some people are indifferent, but they are a little indifferent after all.
Mentality 3: Men want to pour out their hearts.
There is a saying in Zhihu: "Everyone has the experience of crying late at night. People who have this experience seem lonely, but in fact they lack a confidant who can talk to each other. "
When you open the WeChat address book, you can only see a lot of names and notes. However, you can't find someone to talk to.
A heart-to-heart person can only be a trustworthy "confidant". Especially the intimate friends of the opposite sex make people feel particularly "satisfied".
In the family, men want to talk to their wives. The wife thought, why is the husband so melodramatic? As a result, she will just cope with it at will.
However, the real confidante is different. They will listen to men's hearts, comfort men when they feel stressed, let them relax and get spiritual comfort.
Perhaps it is a lucky thing to find a tree hole where you can "listen".
Mentality 4: men are eager to have the dream lover they can't get.
There is a saying that is particularly good, and what you can't get is the best.
You can easily get a person, then will you cherish him? I'm sorry to say that you don't care about him at all, but you have a dispensable mentality.
Similarly, if a man easily meets a confidante, will he cherish this confidante? Maybe a man will get tired of her when he catches her.
Man, a creature, has such a characteristic that he longs for all things that are "hard to get" and "hard to have".
Just like the confidante in the dream, they have been looking for it all their lives, but it is still hard to find it. It is doomed that they will keep such a dream lover in their hearts and always have a desire for a better pursuit.
Beauty is easy to get, but confidant is hard to find, let alone confidante.
Married men's mentality towards confidante 2 What kind of love mentality do boys expect from confidante?
First, look for pure friendship between friends of the opposite sex.
Although confidantes are wasted by many boys, there is no doubt that the first subjective factor for most boys to expect confidantes is that they are willing to find simple, happy, clean and colorful friendships between friends of the opposite sex. Pure friendship is hard to survive among friends of the opposite sex. Especially when you often have separate families, you should be more careful to solve this relationship. If you are negligent, you will be easily looked down upon and even abused.
Even if they are just classmates, they are not other messy connections. Boys look forward to confidante and sincere friendship with friends of the opposite sex.
Second, look for inner sustenance.
Although boys are strong and seem to work hard, there will be times when boys are soft in their hearts. At that time, the softness of most boys always appeared in front of confidantes. Boys usually don't show mountains and rivers, but hide their gentleness in the floating dust of time. Only a confidante can carefully and gently melt the inner glaciers of boys, melt the cold armor of boys, and let boys feel the long-lost warmth and complacency. The existence of a confidante is like a fresh and elegant flower-and-bird painting for boys. Even if you are silent, you are still relaxed and happy.
Third, find a dialog box where you can talk and vent.
The confidante occupies a necessary position and weight in the life of boys. Because the confidante is full of understanding, boys can get enough warmth and wait there. For boys, confidante is a very reliable place and a warm burning fishing fire. Boys can freely pour out their boredom and release them from their confidantes without worrying about being called cowardice by others. Boys are like children when they are sensitive, and most of these sensitivities are always revealed in front of their confidantes who really understand him. Confidante is the energy power to make boys more firm and strong.
Married men's attitude towards confidante 3 What is a confidante in a man's heart?
She is smart and not exclusive, but she is connected with him.
If a woman wants to be eternal in a man's life, she should either be his mother or be the "confidante" he will never get. Once a woman becomes a wife, she no longer looks at men objectively. They like to monopolize, but their confidantes don't. Therefore, women who are willing to be men's confidantes are usually open-minded and smart. After all, a confidante contains many things. Love is too short, marriage is too boring, and only a confidante can last. Most people have their own hidden personalities. If a man's other half is a woman, it is more likely to be a confidante.
Satisfy a man's vanity
Some women are born friends. They like relaxed relationships and hate bondage as much as men. This is undoubtedly the type of friend that more men appreciate. So even if they are not so "bosom friends", men like to be friends with such women. Enjoying the care and closeness of women other than wives or lovers can greatly satisfy men's vanity.
Can inspire men to be more tolerant and understanding.
For example, drinking in a pub, men can fight drinking lawsuits with the same sex, but not with women. Friends of the opposite sex can inspire men to be more tolerant and understanding, and they are willing. This is a gender feature, and the strong like to take care of the weak. So women are loved and men satisfy men's vanity. This is the most fundamental of confidante. Since I am willing, how can I get along beautifully?
Beauty is the object to talk to.
In the eyes of women, a man who finds a confidante can't escape the suspicion of playboy. In fact, many men just want someone to talk to. Song Yumei, a consultant of Listening Language Psychological Counseling Center, believes that men are also fragile and need care. "But in the family, a man is an umbrella against the wind and rain. He must cover up his fatigue and weakness with a strong appearance, and a confidante can release a man's negative emotions. " In men's eyes, women are more delicate and willing to listen. Their breasts, like their mothers, can give men a sense of security.
You can show weakness in front of her
If he is depressed, he may get drunk. If he had a little strength and courage, he might find someone to fight with. However, if he has a considerate female friend, he may talk to her and even cry. Male friends are definitely not good. Even if others don't know, he can't be miserable in front of the same sex. Confidante is not terrible. They love men's occasional weakness in front of them, and prefer to truly appreciate this weakness.
Confidants mainly focus on spiritual communication.
"More friends, less lovers" is the definition of confidante. In this regard, Shilin, an associate professor at the School of Psychology of Beijing Normal University, explained that a normal confidante is still a little more friends, which is a pure heterosexual emotion. For the opposite sex of similar age, it can be called a confidante; People with a big age gap are generally called "forgetting to make friends". A bosom friend can be an inner listener or a spiritual reader. "But this is completely spiritual communication. Once love or sex happens, this relationship will collapse. "
Tip: A man's confidante gives him better spiritual comfort. In their relationship, their feelings are not love, but they are better than love.