Banquet etiquette in European upper class
What is a black tie party?
Translated into Chinese, black tie party means "formal dinner or banquet". It is called a formal banquet because black has always been the color representative of formal occasions, and bow tie is a necessary item for very formal banquets, so the black bow tie party has become synonymous with formal dinners.
A long time ago, the black tie party was a social way for nobles, princes and royalty. Because of their special social status and identity, they can't make friends casually like ordinary people, so they use this kind of party to expand their social circle and make more friends. The invitation of "black bow tie only" means that the event is very formal and many celebrities will attend. At this time, wearing appropriate clothes to attend such activities not only represents your courtesy, but also shows your respect for the host.
A beautiful invitation and two "right" people.
Usually, for a formal dinner, the organizer will make an invitation card, determine the theme, time, place and inviter list, and then send out an invitation. Nowadays, many people send invitations by email. In fact, this is very informal and impolite. Although online life has become popular, it can bring a lot of convenience to sponsors. However, for a formal banquet, the key is not who is convenient, but who is given the greatest respect. A beautiful invitation is essential. Therefore, most people who know about black tie parties usually follow the tradition when holding formal banquets. They will send invitations, which is the only way.
Invitation cards usually need to include the following contents:
1. Theme
2. Name of the invitee
3. Time, place and dress code
4. Contact phone number
5. The name of the organizer and other contents that need to be explained.
As soon as the invitee receives the invitation card, he should immediately check his schedule, then call according to the phone number on the card to confirm whether he will attend on time and ask for some other information and details. In Europe, people usually try to avoid embarrassing and discordant things, so generally speaking, the organizers will try to communicate in time. Because once embarrassment happens, it will have a bad influence on the host and other guests, so you can know the detailed details and requirements just by asking. Then, you should make sure your partner and your clothes for the party. Usually, the number of people invited to formal parties is even. If you get married, the best partner for the party is your spouse. If you are single, you need to invite a companion to go with you. Can be relatives and friends. It will be embarrassing to avoid going alone, and it will also make the organizers feel disrespectful. Moreover, the person you invite is best at the same social level as you, and it is not suitable for anyone to go with you. Appropriateness is particularly important in formal banquets, and mutual respect is an eternal theme in formal gatherings.
Men's clothing details
The eternal theme of men's dress code is: simplicity, exquisiteness, nobility and elegance, with black as the main theme. Evening dress, silk waist-wrapped, silk-wrapped dress pants and black socks and shoes are the most basic dress requirements. With the development of society, an exquisite belt is now recognized and accepted by people. But it must also be a delicate black belt without product identification, which is a very disrespectful performance in formal occasions. Men should not wear too many accessories, such as earrings, necklaces, bracelets, etc., while showing men's taste and grade focuses on expensive watches, cufflinks, high-grade leather shoes, dresses made of high-quality materials and elegant manners. White socks are absolutely not allowed.
What needs to be reiterated here is that this is a formal dinner party, not a fashion party. Therefore, it is absolutely impossible to stand out from the crowd and be unique. Any performance is mainly based on absolute respect for others. Therefore, any excessively special dress and behavior are not allowed. Men are not allowed to wear perfume. The substitute is light perfume or cologne, preferably tasteless.
Women's dress details
Women's dress code is diverse. Black bow tie party is the best occasion for women to wear their precious jewelry, but it should not be too much. A precious necklace, a pair of high-grade earrings and a precious hand ornament are the best choice, while the dress color is mainly formal, and the best dress color is black or red evening dress. Plus some other expensive decorations, it is enough to show your taste, status and identity. Don't wear heavy makeup or fancy clothes. Perfume should not be too strong, mainly light. If you are not sure, you'd better not wear perfume. The reasons are: first, this kind of formal banquet is usually held indoors, and your strong smell will cause discomfort to others; Second, this kind of banquet is generally based on eating and eating. Your fragrance will change others' appreciation of food and affect everyone's appetite. So it is generally better not to spray or to be very, very light. Elegant speech and profound knowledge can naturally attract people's full attention to you, and minor unnecessary modification becomes a rude taboo.
In the past, the organizers of such parties would send their own cars to pick up the invited guests. With the development of society, many people now own their own private cars and prefer to drive to parties by themselves. In fact, this should be avoided as much as possible. If it is inevitable, the organizer should also prepare the service staff to help the guests park, because you are dressed in formal clothes and don't want to get sweaty or make a mess of expensive gifts because of the trouble of parking. Dressing is not suitable for going too far or doing too many things. It is convenient and comfortable to go by car, which is more in line with your simple lifestyle and keeps a happy mood.
A guide to black tie party etiquette
In Europe, this kind of party was usually held in a suite or villa with two or more floors, so the host's housekeeper would meet you at the door and provide you with the service of storing clothes and some personal belongings. Then you can take your partner upstairs. At this time, the host usually waits for the guests at the top of the stairs. Of course, now that the environment is relaxed, guests can hang up their clothes without a housekeeper.
Shaking hands is the best polite greeting between men, but when a woman meets a male host, it is best to stick a face and kiss her hand. However, it should be noted that these two greetings cannot be carried out on any occasion or between anyone. For example, people you don't know or meet for the first time can't use face-to-face ceremonies.
Kissing hands is a popular etiquette in European upper class. It is said that this etiquette was invented by the Vikings, because the Vikings had the custom of "giving gifts" to their Germanic monarch. After the Lord left, the door he walked through, the lock he touched and the latch he touched all needed to be kissed by his subjects, so this etiquette decided that it must be done indoors. The recipient of the hand kiss ceremony can only be a lady, and it should be a married lady. Wrist and above are forbidden areas when saluting.
At the same time, if the woman reaches down first, the man can kiss; But if the woman doesn't reach out, she won't kiss. When kissing hands, if the woman is in a high position, she should kneel in a semi-kneeling position before shaking hands and kissing. Moreover, women can't take the initiative to raise their hands. Men should take the initiative to raise women's hands to a certain extent and then bend down to finish. And it is forbidden to kiss the back of a lady's hand. You can only approach and leave quickly. The lady smiled back to show her gratitude for her respect. Moreover, hand kissing can neither be performed in public nor in the open air, let alone kissing a gloved hand. Otherwise, it will be regarded as disrespectful to a lady and impolite by others.
Then the host will lead the way into the hall or sit down. There is usually a guest's name in front of each seat, and you can sit down according to the name. Don't sit down at will, come uninvited, sit down first. Moreover, the male host should serve the ladies of the guests, and only after settling down can he sit down by himself, otherwise others will think that you are impolite, uneducated and disrespectful to women.
In today's society, the etiquette of shaking hands is the main thing. Not in specific occasions and occasions, some overly complicated etiquette can be omitted, and shaking hands is the best, while formal dinner is based on simplicity and exquisiteness, not the more complicated the better.
What behaviors should not be there?
Speaking of this, it is worth mentioning some small mistakes that people are used to making. For example, when going up and down stairs, many men like or are used to walking behind women, which is wrong. Men go up and down stairs, if they can't walk side by side, they must walk in front and women follow. The reason for this is that men can better protect women to prevent women from being injured or falling down in an emergency. In other matters, we follow the principle of giving priority to women. If you think it's complicated and hard to remember, that's what you think. When there is danger, the gentleman goes first, and the good things are left to the lady, so there will be no big mistakes. At the same time, it is worth mentioning that in Europe, when men and women walk side by side, men should walk slightly ahead, women should walk slightly behind, rather than companions, elders and people with high status walk slightly ahead, and juniors and people with low status walk slightly behind.
There is also the method of holding the goblet when drinking champagne, which should be held on the foot of the goblet instead of the cup. Because champagne tastes good when it is cold and can hardly be drunk when it is hot, it should be held on the foot of the goblet. If you meet other guests at a banquet, you will generally introduce yourself to your elders or prominent people first, and then wait for the other party to introduce you, otherwise it will be very easy and convenient.
Conversation skills at a banquet are very important. There are several key issues here. First of all, don't talk about any sensitive topics related to religion, politics or others, and try to avoid any conversation that easily destroys the atmosphere and affects the mood and interest of other guests. Second, when you speak, you should give priority to listening, take care of all the guests when you speak, and speak in a soft and standard voice. Usually, this kind of party should not be too loud and unfocused, simple and clear, just relax. When listening to others, try to show your interest and respect.