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"People floating in the river's lake, who can not get a knife? White camel mountain strong bone powder, oral and external use, has a miraculous effect. I got a knife and drew a pack, but I want to get a second knife. I bent over and ate a bag, and I won't be old until I'm 200. White camel mountain strong bone powder, youth powder, friendship powder, Huashan Lunjian designated nutrition, and all major pharmacies in the town have sales in Yiguang. Please look for the black toad anti-counterfeiting mark when buying, gung, gung ... "
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Go back to your home and find your mother!
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"Only when we reached the top of the mountain did we realize that the wrong road and the right road were only a few steps away."
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"Sometimes catching a thief is as simple as that."
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Lv Xiucai: I stabbed you with a sword, and you only said four words. I stabbed you with two swords and you said 36,000 words. Why?
Guo Furong: …
Lv Xiucai: When I stabbed you with the first sword, you said "hero, forgive me", and when I stabbed you with the second sword, you said "36,000 words"! ~
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"Being a man with his tail between his legs is called chivalry."
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"Don't steam steamed buns for breath!"
-
"Where is your sword?"
"The sword is in my heart. What about you? Why not bring a knife? "
"There is no knife in your hand, but a knife in your heart."
-
Zoom in, close-up, two people pulling each other's hair, slapping and biting,
At the same time, they shouted to each other: "Let go, let go! You put it first! You put it first! "
-
"Beauty is not discounted"
My sister's name is Mei, and my sister's name is Fold.
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Listen, people inside, hand over stinky tofu and release the hostages! ! !
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"Ah, my hot biceps brachii ~ ~ ~! ! "
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Thief: Is there a thief like you? Stealing and cleaning other people's houses
Stealing Saint (White): Can it be done without cleaning? I have to follow the footprints.
Thief: You have something. You will return them to others in a few days.
Theft of Saint: Can I not send it back? You are not in a hurry to lose things!
(MS, it seems, probably, I can't remember the specific words ||||)
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Zhang Fei ... Yue Fei .......... Faye Wong @ _ @
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"Do you think I love money so much?"
"You are!"
"I'm ashamed"
"It's good to know shame."
"Shame and joy"
-
Du Shiniang sings: Are you hungry ~ ~ ~
Bai Zhantang heard seven bleeding. ............
It's really funny
-
The proprietress was puzzled by Li Dazui's hunger strike: "You always eat when you are not hungry, but now you are not hungry if you don't eat for two days?"
-
Mo Xiaobei: To hell with her!
Boss: Do you want to die? ! Wait till you finish learning!
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If God gives me another chance, I will definitely say three words to you: ... less salt! ! !
-
-
-
Three clay figurines, two men and one woman.
Zhang Fei, Yue Fei, Faye Wong
-
Xiaomi: What's this?
Passerby: A penny.
Xiaomi: Do you know what day it is today?
Passerby: ...
Xiaomi: Today is the fifteenth day, and the fifteenth day of the first day is a beggar's rest day. Here you are.
The next day, Xiaomi met passers-by again.
Xiaomi: Give me my money back.
Passerby: Don't you want it?
Xiaomi: Yesterday was fifteen, today is sixteen. I go to work.
For this reason, I laughed my head off. )
Also, Xiaomi: beggars have dignity.
-
Xiaomi: Why did you rob my bowl?
Laobai: Nonsense, you are the only one on the road who won't rob you.
-
What Li Dazui said when his mother scolded him was also quite funny.
Mom: I eat more salt than you eat ~!
Li Dazui: That's your mouth weight ~! ~
His mother: I have crossed more bridges than you have! ~
Li Dazui: That's because I'm too lazy to move ~! ~!
-
Guo Furong, the head catcher, is really a bully in the town of the Seven Chivalrous Man!
Li Dazui: Who is that mother?
-
Lv Xiucai soliloquized when practicing to collect debts from Guo Furong:
Guo, how have you been recently? If you have any difficulties, just say,
Say ~ even if there is no difficulty in making difficulties! ~!
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I feel the mantra in the play: Oh, my God! ! ! (Oh, my God)
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Xing Shoutou praised the Hongyi Building next door (the name is not like a restaurant).
Xing Catcher: I was invited by Chef * * *;
Wife of shop-owner: We invited a chef from the Yellow Crane Tower.
Xing took a look at the boss's wife.
Wife of shop-owner: Hehe, washing dishes is also a serious craft ~! ~! (ps: Li Dazui used to wash dishes in the Yellow Crane Tower)
Xing Catcher: Their wine is authentic Daughter Red (I can't remember).
Boss: We make our own wine, ............................................................................................................................................................. ~ 1
Xing Catcher: They invited a famous big bowl to sing * *
Wife of shop-owner: We also have lotus here. (Shouting) Come on, Xiaomi.
Xiaomi (beggar outside the door): I'm eating, and I don't have time ~! ~!
-
Jiushi Xinghua village Fenjiu
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Not for washing dishes, but for washing vegetables in the Yellow Crane Tower.
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Oh, my God! (proprietress)
My son! (Lv Qinghou)
Are you sure? Are you sure? (Guo Furong)
I don't deny veto and negation (Lv Qinghou)
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Guo: I can't sing.
It's okay. Brother Cui is not here. You can lip-synch ~ ~ ~
-
Haha, Cui Jian doesn't know what to think.
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Du Shiniang! The lyrics are as follows, but the tune is sad and not as funny as yesterday, haha.
-
Du Shiniang ~
Lonely lights at night
I sat alone in the cabin.
I'm in the cabin, Du Shiniang.
Waiting for my lang
Suddenly listen to the window
Someone named Du Shiniang.
Put your hand on the window bar and look around.
Why not see my lang?
Ah ~ ~ ~
Jun Lang
Are you hungry?
If you are hungry,
Tell me, ten niang.
Ten Niang, I'll make you noodle soup.
Jun Lang
Are you cold?
If you panic because of the cold,
Tell me, ten niang.
Ten Niang, I'll make clothes for you
Ah ~ ~ ~
-
Jun Lang
Are you bored?
If you're bored,
Tell me, ten niang.
Ten Niang, I've come to relieve your sorrow.
Jun Lang
Do you miss your parents?
If you miss your parents,
Tell me, ten niang.
Ten Niang, I'll go home with you.
Ah ~ ~ ~
Jun Lang
Are you sleepy?
If you are sleepy,
Tell me, ten niang.
Ten Niang, I'll help you to the bamboo bed.
Damn it, Du Shiniang.
Holding a treasure chest in his hand
Jump into the rolling Yangtze River
Never see my lang again.
Ah ~ ~ ~
Lang Jun ~
Are you hungry?
If you are hungry,
Tell me, ten niang.
Ten Niang, I'll make noodle soup for you ~ ~
Later manned also sing:
Lang Jun ~
Are you hungry?
If you are hungry,
Tell me Xiang Yu
Yu Xiang, I'll fry pork intestines for you. .......
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Life is unbearable, and cooking is even more unbearable. .........
-
Son once said: ...
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"Do you think I love money so much?"
"You are!"
"I'm ashamed"
"It's good to know shame."
"Shame and joy"
-
Isn't the funniest Ten Niangs from Yangzhou? She speaks authentic Nanjing dialect. . .
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"You look down on me? I packed my bags and went back to Yangzhou! " Wow, ha ha ha, laughing to death. . . . .
-
Beckham pinched three clay figurines.
One is Zhang Fei, the other is Yue Fei, and the other is Faye Wong.
-
..... If God gives me another chance, I will definitely say three words to you:
"Less ... salt."
-
Guo Furong likes to talk back:
-
You wasted my friendship with you ... friendship ... friendship ... friendship ... friendship ... friendship ... friendship. ...
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Guo Furong: So-and-so is the first overlord of Qixia Town! !
Li Dazui: Who is the mother of Qixia Town?
-
Also a ninja turtle ~:)
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Guo Furong; I used to have yellow hair and split hair * ~ ~ since I used the sesame oil ground by .......... and Li Dazui.
hahahaha
Also: hello, hello, everyone.
-
To deny and deny.
-
Quite sure
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Bai Zhantang: "Keep a low profile! Keep a low profile! "
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Good night, sorry.
Good night, please come in.
Good night. bye.
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Lotus and scholar PK that explosive:
Furong: Suppose I can shoot you to death with three hands. Every time I clap my hands, you will scream "Woman, please forgive me". So, how much do you want to say before you die?
Scholar: I refuse to answer this question.
Furong: That's a waiver.
Scholar: Scream three times, four words at a time, one word *** 12.
Furong: Wrong! It is nine words!
Scholar: Why?
Furong: The first palm goes down, "Women forgive", four words; The second palm goes down, "woman forgives", eight words; The third palm goes down, and you die immediately. You only said one word "ah", 8+ 1=9. hahahaha ...
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Are you depressed? Are you happy to watch "Legend of the Wulin"? Watch The Legend of Wulin.
-
Bai Yutang, the thief, gave the policewoman a note that said, "I'm going to steal your heart."
When a woman was so hot, the note slipped from her hand and landed in Yu Sen's hand. Yu Sen was punished for checking the next night. He shouted at once. . . . Oh,no. Tang Baiyu is going to eat people. . . . . . . . . . . Laugh! !
-
Du Shiniang gave the shopkeeper one hundred and twenty pieces of silver to keep him, and everyone despised the shopkeeper.
Everyone said angrily, "I'll give you one hundred and twenty pieces of silver!" "
Children's shopkeeper: "I feel dizzy when I see hard silver on my head ... am I greedy?" ~ ~"
Everyone: "Great! ! ! ! ! "
Child shopkeeper: "..."
Everyone: "You said you were ashamed ~ ~"
Child shopkeeper bowed his head: "shame .............. (then looked up and smiled) shame and joy ~ ~"
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Lao Xing's self-hypnosis:
This is not clear noodle soup ... this is not clear noodle soup ... this is not clear noodle soup ...
This is eel noodles … this is eel noodles … this is eel noodles …
This is not kimchi, this is not kimchi, this is not kimchi. ...
This is a fat sausage, this is a fat sausage, this is a fat sausage. ...
(then bite)
Who slipped this fat sausage? Why is it so salty and crisp?
I saw a robbery scene yesterday, robbing a beggar's bowl.
Q: Why did you rob him?
Is there anyone else in the street so late?
Q: Why did you steal his bowl?
A: Does he have anything else?
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When the White War Party and Guo teamed up to steal the ring back, the head of the criminal detention had to search in pawn shops, antique shops and grocery stalls first.
Guo: Why not?
Head of punishment: then search brothels?
Guo: Why not?
Criminal detention head: (with a heavy heart) Your mother's arrival will affect your career!
-
Point to the cow's hoof and your hand will be broken. . .
Dragons are dragons, monsters and so on. . .
"I can't read, who am I afraid of?"
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Exhibition Hall: Acting School? ! Call me acting school? ! ! This is not swearing! ! ! I am an idol! ! !
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Hengshan faction is in conflict. I heard that it is because the owner built a house with public funds for the wedding. ....
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Corruption. What? ....
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Big mouth: "Where can I find bird's nest?"
Exhibition hall: "If you can't find bird's nest, look for a pigsty. A lot, that's enough ... "
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Laugh, I'll pull. ,,,, Hahahahaha .....
-
There are also eight anti-theft methods, which are invincible. Digging tunnels for a rainy day, LG and I both laughed to death ... hahahahahahahahaha. .....
-
Xing Capture: Where is the scene? Where is the body? Witness, material evidence, temporary residence permit ... = =! !
-
Haha, I also sent a message to Zhao Benshan today: "It was a beautiful game, why did you make it so disgusting?" -Ha ha ha, laughing to death ~
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Today, Laobai and Furong held corn cobs and presided over the chicken king's hegemony, with rouge on their faces. ...
Fight wits with the restaurant opposite.
-
Lv Xiucai: What can I do?
The proprietress looked at him and said, just live well.
Then he pointed to the counter and said, stand there.
Lv Xiucai: Why?
Boss: Save your energy and eat less.
Lv Xiucai immediately ran to the front of the counter, expressionless and motionless.
-
Today, Laobai and the criminal captors are cool.
Laobai: "Where's your knife?"
The person in charge of criminal detention: "There is no knife in hand, but there is a knife in my heart."
Lao Bai: "Wrong, the highest state is that there is no knife in the hand and no knife in the heart."
-
Then two people open posture-rock, paper, scissors!
The punishment was defeated and the head was scratched to protest: "Isn't it said that there is no knife in the hand and no knife in the heart?"
Laobai: "Yes, I am scissors, not a knife!" " "
Bai Zhantang's flick of hair is so interesting.
-
"I am the body of the young master, and I am the life of running errands!" Shake your head and go out (soliciting customers ~)
-
That's funny!
After watching it for a long time, I think he is quite handsome!
-
Water Margin. . Xu Shui. .
Ha ha. .
-You are not illiterate, at least you know the word "illiterate". . .
1. When the person in charge of criminal detention heard that the lost chicken was back, he lowered his head with a depressed face and said, Mom, I made a wrong case, which affected my career.
2. The proprietress said to the person who caught the criminal; I serve you, I respect you, and my heart worships you.
3. Guo Furong stared at the proprietress for a long time, only to react, and quickly wiped the handrail of the stairs with a handkerchief, which was ridiculous.
4. Laobai stared at the proprietress affectionately, took out a piece of jade, and said it was particularly precious, more precious than life, and wanted to give it to the proprietress. The proprietress just got it, and Lao Bai said, can you lend me some money for the trip? The proprietress flatly refused, and Lao Bai hurriedly asked for his own jade, and the two competed for it. Laughter makes me angry.
-
Your chicken won the Best Egg Laying Award.
Mine is a rooster
-
Just slap me in the face and give me the money ~ ~
-
Passing guest officer ~ Please accept my sincere wishes first. ...
-
Boss-in-law (furious): Xing Yusen! ! !
Xing catcher glared at him.
Wife of shop-owner: What a nice name! !
-
Li Dazui's mother: Son, when you are defeated by the enemy and he wants to kill you, you must let him read the words behind you before he dies generously!
(The last four words: the hero forgives)
-
It's nice to be a good person! ! !
-
Please stay here, this guest officer. First of all, please accept my most sincere wishes ~ ~ ~
-
"The leader is the king of monkeys! ! ! ! ........
-
-
How many times a month do you take a bath 10, and how many times a year?
120 times.
wrong
Why?
Bathing is not allowed in the first month
-
Hunger suits you, hunger loses you, and hunger worships you. .....
-
Seeing you like this, I want to be savage ~ ~
-
Do you want to report the toll?
No, the court gives subsidies every year.
-
Old white soliciting at the door said:
Sir, please accept my sincere wishes at first. ..
-
"It turns out that the strongest acting school in China is you!"
"You say who is acting, you say who is acting! ! You don't call names ~ ~ ~ "
-
I watched the chicken king competition yesterday and laughed to death.
Competition rules: exhibition hall: the weight of chicken should not be less than 8 kg.
Boss: That's a goose.
Exhibition Hall: The tail should be long, not shorter than a few inches (I forgot a few inches).
Boss: That's a pheasant.
Exhibition Hall: How long can claws be?
Boss: That's an eagle.
Later, the chicken flew over the boss's wife, which was also very funny. It gives me a stomachache every day anyway. Seeing this kind of thing after work is really a good way to release stress.
-
Everyone said angrily, "I'll give you one hundred and twenty pieces of silver!" "
Children's shopkeeper: "I feel dizzy when I see hard silver on my head ... am I greedy?" ~ ~"
Everyone: "Great! ! ! ! ! "
Child shopkeeper: "..."
Everyone: "You said you were ashamed ~ ~"
Child shopkeeper bowed his head: "shame .............. (then looked up and smiled) shame and joy ~ ~"
Clap your hands and don't regret it'
"There is someone above me" and "whoosh" more than 80 Royal Guards went to the roof. ...
Finally, the person in charge of the criminal detention inexplicably said: "Who is her mother?" What a mystery! ! "
-
There are seven wounds in all. . . . . . . . . . . .
-
Let go of Xiao Guo!
-
Avalanches ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
-
What story are Xiao Guo and the proprietress making up? Lao Xing is very serious, pointing to his head: "What do you think this is?"
"。 . Yes . It's your head. . 。"
"yes! But there is no water in it! "
Big mouth and big head. ......
-
The breeze and the bright moon tickle my heart
The breeze and the bright moon dig my heart
The breeze and the bright moon stole my heart.
-
Aunt Fan, the mantra of unscrupulous booksellers: Lotus root ~ There are people on it!
-
Grave robber: We are human beings too! We also need recognition, and we also need awards! ! !
-
Don't talk, not even the window! !
-
Shopkeeper: Rule 23 prohibits taking tips and jewelry without permission! !
Guo Furong: Why don't I know?
Shopkeeper: I am the rule! !
-
Big mouth: "Is it particularly scary to put silver under your feet?"
-
Money shopkeeper: "when you get married, you will know that men have corns because of this!" " ! "
-
Why don't you come back when you have a child and a wife?
You should die of old age when you have a baby. Why don't you come back?
-
Wudang Taoist Xu Chong advised her for a long time, but she just wouldn't listen. She also called the Shaolin abbot a bald donkey, and Xuan Jing, a teacher from Emei School, came up and made a circle. Instead of being ungrateful, she asked what the relationship was. "
-
The owner who turned on the light
There are seven wounds in all.
I flew in the sky for half an hour before I came down.
-
Shopkeeper: "That was the first time that the exhibition hall sent something to Russia. How many times in a person's life? This is destiny takes a hand ............ "
-
You really can't help Dou.
Who is Dou?
In Xu Shui, 109 will
Nonsense, there are only 108 generals in Xu Shui. Maybe I'll believe you when you say the romance of the Three Kingdoms.
Is the romance of the Three Kingdoms, Lao Bai finally relieved, Adou is the son of Liu Bei.
This is nonsense! Liu Bei is surnamed Liu. His last name. How could it be his son
……
Lao Bai was so angry with his big mouth that he beat his chest. Finally, vomiting blood looks good ~ ~ ~
-
In the first episode, everyone was very helpless, so they got together and were scolded by the shopkeeper.
Mouth: Boss, you don't know anything. Her face changes quickly and her acting skills are high. Only Xia Qing and Yu Man can compare with her in this life. "
Jim: That's because she doesn't play well, and Xia Qing Yu Man plays beyond her level ... "
Too bad for Mrs. Qian ~ but too strong for her to live ~
Xiao Qiang is not as strong as her ~ ~
-
I have good news and bad news. Which one should I listen to first?
Good news.
-I won't pursue this matter.