If you don't pay attention to finance, you will be abandoned by the world, because it is difficult for you to make money at the speed of printing money. Share some interesting financial jokes. I hope colleagues who are worried about the market can bring you some joy. . . . . . .

industrial economics

In class, the professor teaches economics: "What is the primary industry? Feed cattle and raise sheep. What is the secondary industry? Kill cattle and sheep. What is the tertiary industry? Eat beef and drink mutton soup. " Some students asked, "What about the cultural industry?" The professor's eyes lit up: "Good question! It is worthy of being a good student. " Then answer: "The so-called cultural industry is bragging and being a sheep!"

business model

The young woman reported: "I put my money in my bra and was stolen by a handsome guy in a crowded subway ..." The policeman wondered: "You didn't notice such a sensitive place?" The young woman blushed and replied, "Who would have thought he was touching money?" Comments: Let customers' money be unconsciously touched in a pleasant experience, which is the highest realm of business model.

Beauty index of waitress

According to new york observers, when a lively waitress can be seen with a shop, the economy will be in trouble, and vice versa. In other words, when you meet beautiful waitresses everywhere, you can consider selling stocks.

Why? Observers explained that when the economy is booming, women with a little "capital" can easily find jobs in industries that are not disgusting, such as commodity models and salesmen. In addition, men are more likely to "live in a golden house" when they have plenty of money.

sharing economics

If you have six apples, please don't eat them all, because then you will only get an apple flavor. If you give five of them to others, you will gain the friendship and goodwill of the other five people, and you will get more in the future. When others have other fruits, they will share them with you. People must learn to exchange what you have for something more important and richer for you. Giving up is a kind of wisdom, and sharing is a virtue.

Financial freedom

Some people divide financial freedom into five levels: the first level of financial freedom, the vegetable market does not look at the price; Second-level financial freedom, shopping seems inexpensive; Third-level financial freedom, jewelry luxury stores do not look at the price; Four levels of financial freedom, real estate buying a house looks inexpensive; Five levels of financial freedom, buying a company regardless of the price.

stock market

The economy went up, the stock market plummeted, the economy went down, and the stock market rose sharply. A village head explained: In our village, when the economic situation is good, everyone goes out to move bricks to earn money. When the situation is bad, everyone gathers at the entrance of the village to gamble. ...

vice president

In ancient times, there was a young lady who met a poor scholar and went to Beijing to take the exam to avoid the rain. After discovering that she was very talented, she took out some money and promised herself. The next day, the young lady sent the scholar with tears in her eyes: "If you go to high school, don't be a concubine." The scholar scolded 1 and left. The young lady asked the maid to write down the scholar's name, and the maid said, "This is the fiftieth scholar!" " "The young lady said," I didn't also the way. One of them will actually go in. ".

finance

The scholar demanded to write down the names of the ladies he met along the way, and sighed, This is the ninety-ninth one!

foam

Extremely asked the scholar, "son, you have slept with more than 90 women since you left home three years ago." We went back and forth on our way to Beijing. Aren't we going to catch the exam? " The scholar replied, "Isn't being an official also for money and women?" The spoony girl is over 90, and she is still rushing to take the exam. "

hedging

After arriving in Beijing, the scholar sent one-tenth of the extremely bookish money with him to the casino in Beijing, so that he failed the exam.

be listed

The scholar was taken by the princess, so he was exempted from the test and directly recruited Xu.

Peer to peer network

After the scholar recruited Xu, he could not fulfill his previous commitment to more than 90 women, and the investment of more than 90 women in the early stage went up in smoke.

Safeguard legitimate rights and interests

Miss learned that the scholar had made a fortune, and her previous investment was lost. One by one, she went to Beijing to beat gongs and drums to express her grievances.

(of listed companies) withdraw from the market.

The capital was in chaos, and the Holy One was furious when he learned of it. He divorced the scholar and beheaded him at the meridian gate.

cheat

The scholar took out a pamphlet from him and counted it. He sighed. "This is the hundredth lady. My health is failing, and I have enough money to buy fields and build houses. Go home! "

secret

After March, there was a 43-year-old scholar who went to high school to explore flowers. He did live up to the pleasure of sex and came to marry him. At the moment, the crested rockhopper is wearing summer clothes, and the drums are loud, resplendent and magnificent. Unexpectedly, No.25, the top student in high school, went back to his hometown to visit relatives and hired him by the way. The two scholars argued and alarmed the local authorities. Seeing defeat, the young lady hanged herself in the southeast branch. After righting herself, the servant girl became a flower-exploring lady. In order to remember the kindness of the old Lord, she built a pavilion in the back garden and named it Venture Capital. On the fifteenth day of the first month, she worshipped Sanzhuxiang and sighed!

secretary

Extremely sighed again: Do you want to disclose the names of these ladies? . .

The fourth note of the major scale

In fact, these are all set by the maid of the young lady. The maid asked each of the 100 scholars for introduction fees, and she got a new third board.