The only composition with full marks in the 2008 Shanghai College Entrance Examination.
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At the end of the city, there is no bustling market, no shining neon lights; At the end of the city, there are only weather-beaten dilapidated shanty towns; At the end of the city, there are a group of people like them.
What should I call them? Children of migrant workers? Farmers' children? Or the second generation of migrant workers? No, I don't want to call them by these cold names. I want to call them by their simple birth names, hold their hands and approach their lives. ...
They grew up in the green mountains and green waters of their hometown, and their pure souls started jointing in the fields. In the wind of Shan Ye, they are running and dreaming. The wind blew into the city from the fields. For their livelihood and future, they followed their parents to the city and took root at the end of the city. So I got used to the eyes of green mountains and green waters, and came into contact with tall buildings and traffic for the first time. They don't know how to cross the six-lane road, and their little hands can't tell the floors of the office building. Prosperous modern civilization has never brought them any happiness, but this time, it has left a deep imprint on their hearts.
They took up their schoolbags and carefully integrated into city life. But in the strange eyes of "city people", I understood the difference between hukou and temporary residence permit for the first time. Are the treasures in parents' hearts! But prematurely assumed the burden that does not belong to this era.
When they come home from school, they cook a simple dinner, and their parents are still working at the construction site or the food market; Wake up in the middle of the night, the starry sky in the city is not as bright as my tearful hometown; Make a wish quietly, hoping that their primary school for children of migrant workers will not close down tomorrow because they can't pay the electricity bill. ...
However, I saw their growth in their growing bodies. I remember a reporter asked a child from a migrant children's school if he would go back to his hometown after graduation. The little girl said without hesitation: Of course, he must go back! At that moment, I almost cried for their growth.
I remember their childish declaration on the Spring Festival Evening that year: "Our school is small, but its grades are not bad", "We don't compare with children in the city" and "Beijing's 2008 is also our 2008!" They gradually matured, bid farewell to yesterday's shyness and began to welcome a new day.
Although, they are still worried about small tuition fees; Although, the school still can't afford to pay the utilities; Although, there are still many imperfect systems ... although there are many "although", only one "but" is enough. Many eyes have turned to them, and they are thriving.
The sun rises from the horizon, illuminating the end of the city and their lives.
They will eventually become us.
Correct the teacher's comments:
Full-mark composition has five advantages. First, the composition truly depicts the living conditions of migrant workers' children, from the unnatural and unsuitable experience from rural to urban to the gradual maturity of their mentality, which makes people feel like a real group; Secondly, the composition is written smoothly, which shows that the candidates have accumulated a certain amount of reading, but they have not shown off, properly expressed their emotions and horizons, and the words and themes are well coordinated; Third, on the whole, the composition expresses the author's sympathy, concern and expectation for his peers, and also reflects the requirements of the composition topic. Fourth, the description of this article is very delicate. "Little finger can't count how many floors there are in an office building"; Finally, the article focuses on the changes of migrant workers' children. "They will eventually become us." Candidates did not complain blindly, but wrote changes and hopes.
In 2008, Zhejiang college entrance examination scored a perfect composition "Feeling the countryside"
At first, I thought the countryside was a fairyland of fairy tales. It has faded away the glitz of the city and washed away the complexity of the world. It may be Al on Van Gogh's canvas, the blue sky as clear as a mirror, and the gorgeous sea of flowers as oil painting. Golden sunflowers, nourished by sunshine, have grown seeds of hope. It may be an idyll in Tao Qian's poems, which tells the story of a fairy couple in the fog. The oblique sunshine is light and leisurely.
It's just a village in poetry. When we really walk into the village and feel the village with our heart, we will find that our village is experiencing pain. There is also sunshine, which is not warm but viciously roasting the earth. Looking from a distance, the swaying figure on the earth is tired of its heart in the morning and evening, in spring and autumn. He grew up in this land, and his sweat nourished this land; He learned to be strong in this land, and his steps strengthened this land; He was born in the loess and returned to the loess, which has been endless for generations. When the storm came, his heart trembled like a swaying crop in the field, and tears crossed the cheeks of the ravine, drowning his heart and his breath layer by layer like water drowning the field. When the drought came, the crops shook like his thin body. He can't see hope and gain, and his confused eyes are dry and empty.
They are sometimes happy, but this happiness seems so humble. Their greatest happiness is a bumper harvest. Full particles are like gems, and the corners of the eyes smile like crescent moons. What they want most is good weather, and they just want to live an ordinary life.
Faced with such a picture, will such a country let us down? In fact, the countryside is more real because of this cruel beauty. Feel the countryside, don't always be a leisurely tourist. While appreciating its tranquility and purity, we should pay more attention to its pain and give it more understanding and sympathy.
Feel the countryside, feel the pulse of farming civilization, feel the most vigorous cry of China, feel the massiness of that land, and feel the blood and sweat of that land; Feel the most simple persistence and perseverance of farmers in China, and feel the pain and helplessness experienced by farmers in China.
When we looked at them with disdain, did it ever occur to us that they brought us hope for life with sweat and blood?
With the most humble attitude, we can see that China has become an eternal farmer in history, and let us feel the countryside with our heart!
Fujian college entrance examination perfect score composition "Three Realms of Life"
Three people entered the store and bought juice, coffee and mineral water, because they like sweetness, sweet taste in bitterness and faint feeling.
Let's imagine that if the three customers are not the same age, they are only teenagers, middle-aged people and elderly people. Then it's time for teenagers to like sweetness, middle-aged people to taste sweetness and bitterness, and old people to enjoy light alcohol. Isn't it wonderful to apply these three flavors to life?
When we walk in the world, we all go through three stages: adolescence, middle age and old age. The transition from adolescence to middle age and the weathering from middle age to old age are no less than the growth and aging of the body, but also the growth of the mind and the gradual change of mood.
When I was a teenager, I liked sweetness. Teenagers always like to admire the world with beautiful dreams. At this time, we are still simply immature and burning ourselves in passion. We "teenagers don't know the taste of sorrow" and can proudly "point out the mountains and inspire the writing". We are young, full of energy and full of hope for the future, although "the dust is flying in Wan Huhou"! Teenagers are a realm of loving beauty, so many of them appear in adolescence. Gauss, the "prince of mathematics", was famous in the world when he was young; Young Ding Junhui challenges the world champion; Lang Lang, who is still young, elegantly conveys sweet music to people ... When he was a teenager, he bravely stepped into life carefree. When people reach middle age, I have tasted bitterness, because I like the bitter and sweet feeling. Life at this point is like a cup of fragrant tea, digging sweet in bitterness. This is another realm. When people reach middle age, their careers and lives are mostly at their peak, and many people's helplessness is fully grasped, making their views on the world more mature and stable. "People who can catch up without warning the past." Middle age is a period of connecting the past with the future. Middle age is a period of responsibility. Only coffee, bitter with sweet, shows the taste and charm of middle age.
In old age, I have probably tasted all the flavors of life. The sweetness of mutual help, the fragrance of dreams, the sadness and joy of responsibility, the bitterness of kicking down a bridge when it rains, and the acrimony of hitting a person when he is down ... What is the final collocation? This is a bottle of mineral water. Just like white, it is actually composed of seven colors. The highest state of life is to be calm after the storm. The wind and waves of the world can't make a ripple in my heart. This is the real maturity, with a pair of truly humiliated eyes to see the ebb and flow of the world, flowers bloom and fall. Only in this leisurely state of mind can we taste the faint but rich feeling in clear water.
Life must be like this, drifting away. There is a saying that teenagers look at mountains and waters; Looking at mountains in middle age is not mountains, and looking at water is not water; The old man sees mountains or mountains, water or water. This statement is correct. Life is a cycle from simple to complex, and then to calm and simple. What we have to do is to enjoy every taste and feel every realm, and in this process, purify the meaning of life.
comment
Set the three people in the test material as teenagers, middle-aged people and elderly people in turn, and then describe the different "tastes" experienced in the three stages of life. This is the angle that the author grasps the material as a whole to conceive.
The composition of new materials, although there is no need to quote materials at the beginning of the article, is close to the raw materials at the beginning of this article. The first paragraph outlines the materials from the causal relationship, and the second paragraph shows your own ideas ("imagination"). This text is clear and easy to be accepted by readers.
In terms of content, it is rare that the candidates are teenagers, but they also have an understanding of the "taste" of middle-aged and elderly people; Naturally, this is what the author got through observation and reading. (Yu Faliang)
When people reach middle age, I have tasted bitterness, because I like the bitter and sweet feeling. Life at this point is like a cup of fragrant tea, digging sweet in bitterness. This is another realm. When people reach middle age, their career and life are mostly at their peak. Many helplessness in life has been fully grasped, and they have become more mature and stable.
Excellent composition of Hubei college entrance examination in 2008: raise your hand and cast your foot
When my grandfather died, my grandmother talked with him in a low voice all night, or looked at him as if time had stood still.
When I was a child, I liked to go to my grandfather's house. Grandpa knows many interesting things, and grandma is a superb cook. Every time I listen to Grandpa happily finish a paragraph, Grandpa and grandchildren are hungry. So grandpa crept into the kitchen, grabbed some freshly fried chicken chops while grandma was away, and came back to share them with me like a child. Several times, my grandfather was "stolen" by my grandmother and had to be beaten by my grandmother. Then we obediently set the table for dinner. At that time, I was really happy.
Sometimes it takes grandma a long time to buy food. Grandpa was so anxious that he couldn't sit still and looked out of the window, hoping to see grandma. However, when I learned that my grandmother had come to Wan Li not far to buy our favorite authentic beef, my grandfather smiled again.
However, later, grandpa went to another world that he could never touch again.
The first time I didn't eat grandpa's meal, I ate it in a hotel. Grandma came, but she was unhappy. Grandpa was missing from the tableware prepared for everyone, but when the waiter brought a chair, grandma refused and thanked her.
Grandma said, "The old man told me in his dream last night that he wanted to eat, too. He should be glad that you all remember what he wants to eat. However, the old man said that he would share a chair with me, which is enough ... "Grandma is a simple person, but her words impressed me more than any famous book.
Grandparents always exude something that I can't say, but always want to be close to.
Therefore, even in Tomb-Sweeping Day before the college entrance examination, I still insisted on climbing mountains, sweeping my grandfather's grave and communicating with him silently.
Grandma carefully, carefully set out a small table of exquisite and delicious rice and put it in front of grandpa's grave. Grandma always cries at this time. I know, grandma heard that people in the other world really want to eat sacrificial food, but their throats are only as big as the eye of a needle. Grandma will be sad to think of grandpa like that. And grandma's folded paper money is too thick to burn. If those flying ashes can bring grandma's thoughts, then I think those are the most beautiful love letters.
The little tricks and conversations between my grandparents let me witness their persistence. My eyes are often wet, perhaps because of the long-standing noise, which finally touches a string that has not been dialed for a long time in my heart.
I always try to convey something between gestures. Is it admiration for love or gratitude for love?
Comments: This article has a good selection of materials. It chose tricks and dialogues between grandparents. It looks trivial and ordinary, but it is full of life, permeating the feelings of the characters, and vividly describing the affection between loving elderly couples. The author observes life carefully and deeply, so the article is emotional.
Sichuan 2007 college entrance examination perfect score composition: the definition of a better life
Every life is like a ring, it is hollow and incomplete, but it is complete from beginning to end. We have chosen our own life, our own way of life, whether rich or poor, live our own life, live our own life. ...
Gu Shuli
Songs on the tower of life hope
First, the story in the story
A young man trudged on the road of life. He was forced to give up a backpack on a boat trip. In beauty, health, honesty, alertness, talent, money and honor, he finally chose to give up honesty.
So the ship went on.
Second, the heaviness behind the story.
Seeing such a story, I have a vague sadness. Yes, sad.
For backpacks that are easy to be abandoned, and for young people who are easy to give up "honesty".
Or, for all those who ignore honesty. I don't know whether these people think honesty and trustworthiness have nothing to do with themselves, but I know that a life that refuses honesty is definitely not an excellent life.
Third, life outside the story.
Once upon a time, people began to "safely" imprison themselves in a small cement cage with solid walls. What is it to guard against? Or to hide something? When people cruelly trample on the trust and friendship between people, have you ever wondered what makes people so suspicious and jealous? When people live in the jungle of reinforced concrete, will they worry that their eyes will become metal without feelings one day? When people wear elaborate masks and smile in front of people, do they feel that there is something missing in life?
Honesty! That abandoned backpack.
Fourth, look at life in stories.
I took time to browse the newspaper the other day. It is reported that people with poor personal credit refuse to register a company, serve as an enterprise legal person or apply for senior management within three years.
All right!
It seems that honesty is not always a forgotten role.
Kundera said in The Unbearable Lightness of Life: The so-called life is the giving and receiving of honesty, friendship and trust.
My mother-an ordinary professional woman and my idol-told me that honesty is the foothold of life.
So, today I write down here: Honesty is the fulcrum of life, and it is also the criterion of my life.
The so-called excellent life means being honest and trustworthy and loving life.
● Expert comments:
Standing on the height of "life", this paper describes the importance of "honesty" to life in a piecemeal way. Quotations, narratives, examples and famous sayings echo and promote each other, which naturally completes the definition of "good life". The four subheadings of the article are cleverly named and have ingenious internal relations with each other, making the article seamless and without a sense of separation. I have my own thoughts on the definition of "excellent life", which embodies some originality. It is not easy to write such an article in a short time.
Sichuan 2007 college entrance examination perfect score composition: I am honest, I am beautiful
Honesty and trustworthiness is a fine tradition of the Chinese nation. For thousands of years, people have emphasized and respected honesty. The wind of honesty is simple and mellow. The longer the history, the greater the spirit of honesty, which pervades China. She has long been integrated into the blood of our national culture and has become an indispensable part of cultural genes.
However, in recent years, with the impact and cleaning of market economy, people find that honesty is fading and "money worship" is growing. "Benefit" replaced virtue and honesty and gave way to fraud. On the balance of many people's lives, the sinking end is "
Health, beauty, alertness, intelligence, money and honor are the only things that stand above. Honesty is getting lighter!
Not to mention the intrigue and intrigue in the mall; Needless to say, the hawkers in the market are short of weight and shoddy; Needless to say, dirty rice oil is sold against old rice, and tap water is mixed with methanol; Even if one day the weather is fine and you are happy, you accidentally find a bulging wallet on the side of the road: dare you pick it up? And live! If it happened years ago, you would gladly give it to the police uncle to win people's praise, but today, in the crowded street, I objectively say that as long as you touch the bag, you will be in trouble.
This is the case in the small environment, and there are many examples in the international environment. Looking at Uncle Sam across the sea, he regards honesty as nothing. We want to engage in NMD The ABM Treaty is an obstacle, and there is no room for negotiation to tear it up.
The wind of honesty will stop, and people of insight will lament.
However, we, the new century and new youth, have slowly unfurled a banner, and we wrote, I am honest and beautiful!
Adolescence is the golden age of life, a period of truth, goodness, beauty and purity of life. Honesty is the virtue that should not be ignored and is easily overlooked. It is necessary for us to hold high the integrity so that everyone can see it and be attracted by her warm light.
I have a strong feeling that in the foreseeable future, honesty will return to the market, to the society, to you and me. She is like a stream of water, gradually infiltrating and deeply rooted in people's hearts; She is like a breeze, blowing across the fields and blowing people's hearts. There, at that time, honesty replaced affectation, order replaced disorder, simplicity replaced complexity, warmth replaced indifference, and people were bathed in the morning glow of honesty and benefited a lot.
Then, act, my friends!
I am honest and beautiful; I am beautiful, I am proud!
● Expert comments:
The author of this paper pays close attention to life enthusiastically, and conveniently photographs some phenomena in life from small to large, from near to far, step by step. The language is clean and neat, and the lines are filled with deep feelings and heroism. It seems that as long as we pay close attention to life and write with passion, we can write good articles.
Sichuan 2007 college entrance examination perfect score composition: walk with integrity
Someone once asked me why I could make my career bigger.
-Answer: Nothing but a word and a letter.
This is what "Li" said to the microphone of the reporter of Asia Weekly in the president's office of Changjiang Industry. His heartfelt words, with the help of powerful radio waves, spread all over the world and shocked our hearts.
Perhaps, another sentence that Superman didn't say is: Being sincere to others means believing in yourself.
...... Once upon a time, I also had a lost time.
Letter? I'm ashamed.
-Tonight, the green hills under the moon in the forest are unparalleled! The quiet girl in Juanjuan, although bright, is not frivolous; Her eyebrows are low and her sleeves are drooping, and her wreath is neat. I sat alone on the bluestone outside the forest, holding my head in my hands. I don't talk. I stopped talking, only looked down at my achievement notice with misty eyes. Half a year's vanity and self-deception, half a year's flying and frivolous, all soaked this ridiculous paper.
It suddenly occurred to me that whoever is dishonest to fate will not believe him. Trekking on the long road of life, on the hard and stumbling road of struggle, whoever does not print the footprint of honesty will never get out of the narrow circle. There should be no hypocrisy and deception on the road of learning.
I don't mean to lament autumn, but I'm afraid the flowers will wither. I don't know if I betrayed myself or if I was tired of honesty: I stopped at this hurdle in my life.
The shame of the Sri Lankan people. Like a butterfly with broken wings, flapping its broken wings, dancing in vain and flying into the mud. My father's hard work comes to mind: a yellow-brown plain. On the horizon, one place after another was made of wooden rafters into earth walls more than a foot thick. Poplar, melia azedarach and Sophora japonica trees, with branches as thick as barrels and leaves as small as copper coins, are flying in the wind, like the tunes of nature, reaching their parents' ears. With their bare hands, they waved their whips, shouted at the yellow cattle like mountains and rivers, and pulled triangular plows. This group of people who have worked hard to dig rations from the yellow land left by their ancestors, "integrity" is their lifeline.
If a farmer is wrong for a while, he will be wrong for a year.
People who don't believe for a moment don't believe for a lifetime.
..... Inadvertently, like a finger, he sneaked into my heart, plucked the untouched string at the bottom of the heart, and played a series of vibrato, as if Xu Beihong's galloping horse hissed in the wilderness, as if Schubert's keys trembled like stars, as if standing at the top of the Himalayas, listening to the wind outside.
At this moment, it suddenly dawned on me:-Walk honestly on the road of life.
● Expert comments:
This article is good at using poetic language to set off the atmosphere. Materials are sorted out by others to reflect on themselves, by themselves to think of others, and then by others to observe themselves, layer by layer to "torture" their souls, and the context is clear. The article skillfully uses classical poetry and is good at shaping artistic conception. Language such as "a farmer is mistaken for a year for a moment" and "a person who doesn't believe for a moment will not believe for a lifetime" is full of philosophy. It seems that improving the cultivation of ancient Chinese prose is very beneficial to the improvement of writing level.
Sichuan 2007 college entrance examination perfect score composition: patient Wu's medical record
Name: Wu
Gender: male or female.
Age: Born in 1960s and 1970s.
Occupation: to be determined
Diagnostic method: combination of traditional Chinese and western medicine
First, visit the clinic.
Face: It's no big deal, just don't blush. His face won't change color even after "hitting a person when he's down". Eyes: The eyes are inflexible and can only look sideways or at "money". Cunning eyes. Nose: the nose is upturned, the nostrils are enlarged, and the sense of smell is intermittent. You can only smell bureaucracy and extravagance, but you can't smell popularity and poverty. Tongue: deterioration, inaccurate pronunciation, and the shape between tongues tends to be spring. Say "lie" (sā hung) clearly pronounced, say "true" (zhēnhuà) vaguely pronounced, unclear articulation.
Second, feel the pulse.
The pulse is heavy, fast, rapid, tight, slippery and astringent ... typical symptoms of heart failure caused by palpitation and premature beats after bragging.
Third, the perspective.
1. The liver and lungs appear dark or even black. 2. The spine shows signs of bending, and the condition is characterized by straight waist.
Fourth, blood sample collection
The patient's blood color is dark red. The molecular structure of blood color is varied, with talent, appearance, money and thinking, among which the first three are mostly, but there are few honest cells and platelets.
Gene identification of verb (abbreviation of verb)
After precise instrument testing, the patient's genes have changed. It can no longer be shown to future generations, and the structure of "faith, righteousness and loyalty" has been destroyed. Although genetic testing can't determine the family, their actions have a strong sense of feudal small farmers. It is manifested in bending over when you see five buckets of rice (of course, problems have been found in the spine), intrigue, intrigue and poaching.
Sixth, the treatment method
1. blood exchange: inject a lot of "humanistic" oxygen to replace the harmful "money worship" carbon dioxide in the body. 2. Ask yourself once every morning and evening, and have a clear conscience. 3. Read more essays to awaken their sense of honesty.
Seven, the doctor suggested.
This case is not found for the first time, and it is very representative. Please pay attention to patients and don't infect each other.
Doctor (signature)
● Expert comments:
This paper is novel in form and highly innovative. This paper describes the characteristics of faithless people from the outside to the inside through four ways: seeing a doctor, feeling the pulse, fluoroscopy and blood sample collection. The reasons for the loss of integrity are revealed implicitly through gene identification, and the basic methods to restore integrity are put forward through treatment and doctor's advice. What, why and why does the full text go deep?
Sichuan 2007 college entrance examination perfect score composition: keep the inner contract
I am often moved to tears by an old man named Weisheng. "I have an appointment with that woman, and that woman didn't arrive until three days later. In the event of a flood, the micro-life died holding the column. " Weisheng is such a persistent and lovely gentleman. For that perhaps unimportant agreement, in order to keep the contract written to him in his heart, he bravely defended it with his life. I saw two flashing words from him-honesty.
I often miss the ancient times, which was an era full of personality charm. Behind those gentlemanly manners is a person's structure supported by honesty, credit and persistent beliefs. Don't those brave people who don't go to the water miss their homeland? Doesn't he know the danger and harm of going deep into the den? He walked without hesitation, so firmly, with a cavity of loyalty to the monarch and a cavity of loyalty to the oath. Don't Lin Xiangru, with Choi in his hand, know that the king of Qin is insidious and greedy? He promised to return to Zhao intact before departure! He is following a difficult road of practicing his promise, bravely defending the interests of the country and the immortal contract in his heart.
These are old stories, and history and time may have faded them a little. The noise of the streets and the colorful shadows of neon lights drown out the brilliance of human nature, and we have to sigh for those lost qualities.
Those impetuous people who sing "don't care about eternity, only care about what they once had" may forget that marriage is a contract of happiness and a contract of the soul. Only by carefully guarding can we reap the fruits of happiness.
Those insatiable people, thinking that "they have the right not to use it, and it will be invalid when it expires", may forget the oath they made in party flag, which is a constraint of behavior and a straightforward belief. A person who can even abandon his beliefs will eventually be abandoned by society.
An unconstrained mind is empty and free, just like a soul that has lost its home, a tree that has lost its roots, and a river that has lost its source. It can only degenerate, wither and dry up. ...
A voice from the soul is crying: stop-the contract of the soul: honesty!
● Expert comments:
This paper uses historical stories flexibly, skillfully selects some phenomena in real life, skillfully integrates books with life, satirizes the present from ancient times to the present, and sets modern people against the ancients with rigorous structure. The penultimate paragraph embodies the author's profound thoughts and the beauty of reason; Language such as "keeping the contract of the soul" is poetic and beautiful; The use of parallelism to group segments embodies the beauty of momentum and eloquence. Therefore, how to use the book knowledge learned and the real life observed in writing is an important content of writing training.