Source | Live as much as possible (WeChat official account: wanqingdepingtai)

I wrote an article about identifying men some time ago. A girl left me a message saying that there was something wrong with her boyfriend.

The conditions of girls are not bad, and the work is not bad. At first, she didn't have a crush on her boyfriend at all. She thinks he is not very good-looking, his family conditions are not good, and his education is a little low, so he has always refused to pursue him.

However, the other party did not give up, and kept sending her breakfast and fruit snacks, which quite satisfied the vanity of girls.

Of course, the girl will not be shaken by this little kindness, but she will gradually get used to his existence.

Later, once, the girl made a big mistake at work and was severely criticized by the leader. That day, she was particularly depressed. The man has been accompanying her to comfort her and take her to the seaside to play.

Probably when people are vulnerable, they are most likely to yearn for this kind of warmth, and this man chased her for more than a year, so she relented and agreed to be a girlfriend.

At the beginning of love, the man was more considerate to her, and she told herself in her heart:

Although he is not handsome and has no money, he is very kind to himself. What do women really want? I just want to know how cold and hot she is.

But gradually, there are more and more contradictions between them. Her boyfriend kept staring at her and insisted on asking who she was talking to.

Once, she ordered a takeaway. It was extremely hot outside. The takeaway brother was sweating when he came up. She couldn't stand it, so she gave him an iced drink to cool him down.

As a result, her boyfriend called her easy virtue, even seduced the takeaway brother, and finally smashed her mobile phone.

Besides, she found that he had a serious problem. When chasing her, he often buys fruit snacks, but after they are really together, they are reluctant to spend money and often ask her to pay.

If she has a slight objection, he will say what I bought you when I chased you and how much it cost. It seems that I want to take the money I spent from her, which makes people very uncomfortable.

The biggest difference between them is that once he mentioned marriage, she said that parents wanted a bride price, but they didn't want it, and eventually they would marry their daughter.

As a result, he reacted strongly, saying that your parents were going to marry off their daughter or sell it. She explained that, of course, they will marry off their daughter, and the bride price is just a form, and my parents will not accept it.

The boyfriend said, since it's just a formality, why do you want a bride price? Your parents are vain.

The two broke up in discord. After many times, the girl had the idea of breaking up and even quarreled several times.

But every time after she said goodbye, her boyfriend would come and coax her, begging for mercy humbly, making her feel that he was a little pitiful, perhaps insecure!

But then I realized more and more that he might have some psychological problems, so the idea of breaking up became stronger.

In addition, the recent wife-killing case and domestic violence case in Hangzhou made her very nervous. She felt that he was emotionally unstable and under great psychological pressure.

Especially after reading my article, she felt that she had to break up, so she formally broke up and said that she was just a little touched at first. He is not her type, and she hopes that the two of them can get along well.

But her boyfriend totally rejected it. He went to her home, went to her company, knelt down and begged, saying that he just cared too much about her, because she was his own world, which made her lose face and became a joke.

It's been worse recently. She follows her every day. Worried about her personal safety, she called the police twice, but to no avail. She just warned them to deal with their emotional problems properly. We're all adults.

So, the girl said to me very distressfully:

Sister Lian Qing, will he really treat me badly? How can we get rid of him completely? Now I feel scared when I think about him.

I can't help telling you a story.

A year ago, a similar girl came to me. At that time, she had not broken up, but her boyfriend was very extreme and would probably get back at her.

She wanted to break up peacefully as much as possible and asked me if there was any good way.

Knowing that this man's personality is extreme and filial to his parents, I advised the girl:

You often show unfilial behavior in front of him, and you will treat your in-laws badly in the future. For example, your in-laws must pay for your wedding room and take care of your children, and you should also blame them for your bad behavior.

Sure enough, after she made these remarks, her boyfriend was very dissatisfied with her, thinking that she had a bad heart and would wronged her parents in the future.

The two men quarreled several times. Boyfriend says parents are the bottom line, and daughter-in-law has to be filial to her in-laws.

The girl said that my in-laws didn't eat a grain of rice or drink a bowl of water. Why should I be filial to my in-laws? After marriage, I will never live with my in-laws, nor wait on them when I am old, nor am I my own biological parents.

After that, the girl was greedy for enjoyment, vain, compared with others, gossiped, and almost didn't get along with her boyfriend's buddies.

His friends say in front of him every day:

Your girlfriend is exaggerating. There are many good girls in the world. Why did you find such a girl?

Finally, the girl got a heavy one. Because of "carelessness", she lost a sum of money, and her boyfriend broke up with anger.

The girl got her wish, but she was worried and asked me:

Elder sister, if I do this, will my reputation be discredited?

I said that there are only a few people in the world who know you. Your reputation is not so easy to destroy. You want to break up peacefully and don't want to be retaliated by him. You always have to sacrifice something. Compared with the noise, this price is nothing.

She didn't even want to mention it after her boyfriend broke up with her. In fact, it passed quickly and had no effect on the girl's life.

Now, the girl has a new relationship, and the two decided to get married on National Day. Looking back, it's as far away as a dream.

I always feel that I can't hurt people's hearts, but I must have the ability to protect myself, especially women. There are too many opportunities to get hurt. More self-protection wisdom can make this life more peaceful and happy.

-End-

Late love, a million-selling author, the founder of Yunyixuan Jewelry, is committed to women's self-growth. The new book "The more self-discipline, the more freedom" is a best seller, and the masterpiece "Be a just right woman", Weibo: the nest of belated love, public platform: live as much as possible, ID: wanqingdepingtai.