Composition revision often starts from the following aspects: scrutinizing the theme, adding or deleting materials, adjusting the structure and polishing the language. Common composition revision methods mainly include the following: reading revision. That is, after the article is written, the author reads it repeatedly (aloud or silently)
Composition revision often starts from the following aspects: scrutinizing the theme, adding or deleting materials, adjusting the structure and polishing the language. Common composition revision methods mainly include the following: reading revision. That is, after the article is written, the author reads it repeatedly (aloud or silently)
2. How to modify the composition What kind of composition to modify, and cultivate students' ability to modify.
Teachers should not only strengthen the special training of revising compositions, but also teach students the methods of revising compositions. Through years of teaching practice, I have summarized five ways to revise my composition: reading aloud, peer review, time cooling, teacher review and referring to excellent works.
The Outline of Chinese for Primary Schools clearly stipulates that it is necessary to cultivate students' ability to modify their compositions. Why do you want to revise your composition? What are the good ways to revise the composition? After practical accumulation, I think students should first realize the importance of revising their compositions ideologically.
There are countless examples of this. The authors of The Crow and the Fox and The Wolf and the Lamb, which were selected for primary school textbooks, are the outstanding Russian fable writer Krenov. He always kept revising his works until every sentence hit Shui Piao vividly. For example, his fable Du Fu and the Rooster has more than 200 draft lines. Later, after repeated revisions, only 2 1 line was published. It is precisely because of his constant revision of his works that his works are widely circulated in the world.
Great writers are still so, what's more, we are dealing with primary school students who have just learned to write. Even a well-conceived composition can't be accomplished overnight, and there are often some defects, such as missing words, repetitive words, messy levels and unclear details. After the revision, inappropriate places in the text are reduced, obvious mistakes are corrected, and the quality of students' compositions is improved.
If you find your own shortcomings in the revision, you can make fewer such mistakes in the future. After correcting your own problems, you can learn from them and master the writing rules. It can be seen that writing a composition must form a good habit of revising more.
In teaching practice, I summarized five methods to revise my composition: 1. Read aloud to revise my composition. After doing the exercises, read aloud several times, and let your ear be the "teacher".
Strange to say, once the article is read out, you can hear what is missing, what is not smooth, and what is wrong. Whenever it sounds awkward, we should carefully find the problem and correct it. For example, a classmate wrote in his composition, "As soon as I entered the campus, the first thing I saw was a rich rockery." When he read this sentence aloud, he always felt awkward. After careful consideration, he thinks that "first" and "first" should be kept to avoid repetition. He also thinks that it is not appropriate to describe rockery with "richness", but it is more appropriate to replace it with "novel shape". After reading the revised sentence again, he felt much smoother. It seems that the teacher "Ear" is really competent and picks out all the faults.
In addition, reading aloud and correcting yourself is a quick and effective method, which can correct the phenomenon of missing words and sentences with obvious errors in composition. 2. Peer evaluation method.
As the saying goes, "the authorities are fascinated, the onlookers see clearly", because the composition you write is what you want to say psychologically, others don't know what you are thinking, and you can only understand it through words. It often happens that you can't write clearly, but you understand and others don't understand.
Because of this, it is very necessary for students to evaluate each other. If they criticize each other, the problems in the composition will be inevitable. Don't look down on these little teachers, they do a good job.
A student with strong writing ability constantly uses good words and sentences in his composition, which is personification, but when it comes to the' little teacher', it won't pass. "You write flowers, blue sky, trees and grass for a while. In this order, after reading the composition, it feels like eating a nodding pill, up and down. " The little author is not convinced. The two were at loggerheads and asked the teacher for a theory.
The teacher guides the situation and explains the importance of observation order and observation method. Two students nodded and said yes.
It is not necessarily that the level of' little teacher' is much higher than that of the little author, but if you can pick out faults and correct them, your writing level will be improved in this revision. Third, the teacher's evaluation method.
Teachers' comments should be accurate and representative. I only take the third composition in the fifth textbook of primary school as an example. Design the table below and make comments.
The types of errors are similar to the diagram of sick sentences (1), in which the types of errors are the knowledge imparted by teachers, and the example sentences are the original sentences in students' compositions. Cause analysis and modification methods are the focus of this comment, and teachers need to guide students to find and correct. A similar sentence is to ask students to check whether there is such a deficiency in their composition after commenting.
According to this table, students' enthusiasm is improved, their memory is profound, especially when modifying the scheme, their thinking is more active, and many sets of feasible modification schemes are provided. 4. Time cooling method.
I found this method by accident. When the students finished writing the article Spring in Campus, they didn't have time to revise it. After a while, I'll make it up. I didn't expect the effect to be excellent. After careful consideration, I realized that what the students were writing at that time was. After a period of time, they learned new texts, read new compositions and accumulated knowledge. So they revised their previous compositions and made many innovations.
For example, after learning the text of Xilin Gol Prairie, students understand that the text ends with lyrics, which reflects the happy mood of small herders. In students' compositions, there are articles that begin with' Where is spring, where is spring …' and end with' Birds lead the way, the wind blows to us …' to express their feelings and attract readers. Nanjing Yangtze River Bridge is set off by describing the weather and ends with Chairman Mao's poems. In students' compositions, there are some good sentences with novel ideas and accurate words, such as "warm sunshine and cool spring breeze make people feel relaxed and happy", "Spring scenery on campus can't be shut up, laughing out of the wall" and "lilacs, purple flowers, with their mouths open, emitting fragrance and smiling at green leaves".
It's a good idea to revise it immediately after writing, and it's also a good idea to revise it later. 5. Reference methods for excellent works.
A person who is good at learning must read more books and accumulate diligently. Our class should carry out excellent works appreciation activities every semester, so that students can revel in beautiful articles.
Yes
3. Talking too much about the basic methods of revising the composition will only be too complicated.
Let me quote a sentence, hoping to help you.
"Composition means what you think, just say what you think."
The purpose of the revision is to improve on the basis of the original work, and if the original work is dogtail grass, I don't think it is possible to make roses no matter how "adding, deleting, changing, adjusting, changing and staying" ... Of course, I'm not saying that my friend said it badly, I'm just making a supplement.
A good composition often needs no revision, because it has already melted into the author's mind.
In short, the composition depends on words, on the expression of true feelings, not on revision.
4. Experience in writing and correcting compositions. The writer lives a colorful life with three inches of hair in his hand. When writing a composition, you should pour all your emotions and thoughts into the article, so that the article will become full and full of flesh and blood. Secondly, you should be good at arranging and grasping the structure and planning the layout of the article, so that the thinking level of the article is clear and the logic is strict, giving people a seamless feeling. Third, you should skillfully use rhetoric to increase the literary grace of the article.
As for correcting the composition, you can take others as a mirror, measure gains and losses, lack friends, and add your own corrections. In a word, correcting the composition is not a personal project, but an organic combination of other people's evaluation and your own cognition.
5. Help write an unforgettable composition. How to get rid of the dilemma of having nothing to say when writing? I think we can try the following methods.
First, the concept of stream of consciousness was first put forward by American psychologist William? Proposed by James. He believes that people's consciousness activities are not carried out in a fragmented way, but in a stream way, which is carried out in the way of thought flow, subjective life flow and consciousness flow.
At the same time, it is believed that human consciousness is composed of rational consciousness and illogical and irrational subconscious; It is also believed that people's past consciousness will emerge and interweave with their present consciousness to reorganize people's sense of time and form a sense of time with direct reality in subjective feelings. The French philosopher Bergson emphasized and developed this sense of time and put forward the concept of psychological time.
Freud, an Austrian psychiatrist, affirmed the existence of the subconscious mind, which is the basis of vitality and conscious activity. Their theoretical viewpoints promote the formation and development of the method of stream of consciousness in literature and art.
Later people developed it and used it to create novels. French writer Proust and British writer Woolf are both writers of stream-of-consciousness novels, and Wang Meng of our country also writes stream-of-consciousness novels.
Taking Woolf's novel Spots on the Wall and Wang Meng's novel sound of spring as examples, we can see that they both write according to the stream of consciousness, and write relevant contents into the novels to express their themes. After reading Spots on the Wall, we can clearly feel this "coherence of things".
In the article "Spots on the Wall", the author mainly adopts two flow modes, one is jumping flow and the other is chain flow. Jumping flow is divided into two categories. The first kind is parallel jump flow, that is, things are in parallel relationship.
Such as birdcage, iron skirt hoop, steel roller skates, coal bucket in Queen Anne's time, billiard table, clavichord, jewelry and so on. These things can be arranged at will, in no order. The other is stepped jumping flow, that is, there is a relationship between things, such as scenic spots-nails-portraits-old houses-old tenants-seen on the train and so on. These things, whether in form or meaning, have certain levels and cannot be arranged at will.
The serial flow is similar to the thimble in our rhetoric, that is, the former image leads to the latter image. For example, an ancient tomb-tomb or camp-bones-collector (collecting bones)-priest (communicating with collectors)-wife (taking her to travel through textual research)-cherry sauce, study (at this time, the wife is trying to make cherry sauce or tidy up the study)-camp or grave (the priest's hope) and so on. It can be said that these images are not created out of thin air, but are caused by one thing.
Similarly, Wang Meng's "sound of spring" is also written by using the writing technique of stream of consciousness. Let's look at a passage: "He hasn't been back to his hometown for more than twenty years.
Who gave him the wrong child? Landlord, landlord! 1956, he went home once, and once was enough-he stayed at home for four days, but studied for 22 years! And a word from a great man is enough for people to learn and implement for a hundred years. What puzzles him is, is life all about reviewing? Was he born in China just to look back on his life? Fortunately, it's all over.
The assembly line of Stuttgart Mercedes-Benz Automobile Factory keeps turning, and the workshop is clean and bright with little noise. Siemens is a big company with a history of 130 years.
We're just getting started. Catch up! Catch up! No matter how hard it is.
Moo, moo, moo, hurry up, hurry up, hurry up, hurry up, hurry up, the sound of the wheels changed from a low three-beat to a two-beat, and finally became a high-pitched call sign. Whether it's a stuffy tanker or not, it drives very fast.
Besides, there are tridents in the sky. "Look, this method of writing with stream of consciousness is not very studious? The following is a passage written by a student, entitled "I wish I had a free world": math test paper, 5 1 score. A 53-point chemistry test paper.
The stern face of the invigilator. It's another hateful quadratic equation. It's scary.
The TV program is Kyoto Chronicle, and my father won't let me watch it. The sultry night makes people restless. Mosquitoes are flying around in the light. Bang! How tired! The molecular formula of copper sulfate, oxygen molecule has two atoms.
Worry about the world first, and enjoy it later. I only have one brain, but I have to remember so many words! The bench will be cold for ten years, and the article will not be empty.
After studying hard at the cold window for ten years, one test will determine the dragon worm. Dazelong and the snake.
Is it a dragon or a worm? It's either dragons or worms! Bang! The window was blown open by the wind, and the draft paper flew around the room like that silver butterfly. If only I were a butterfly? This passage reflects the situation that energetic teenagers are tortured by exam-oriented education into insanity, poor thinking and no aura. This effect is inseparable from the author's writing technique of stream of consciousness.
Second, the key demonstration method The so-called key demonstration method is to divide the whole thing into several small steps according to different angles such as time, place, events and people, and then write part by part around these small steps. Look at a passage in A Dream of Red Mansions: I saw a daughter-in-law standing there with a box, and a maid came up and opened the lid, which contained two bowls of vegetables.
Li Wan put a bowl on Grandmother Jia's desk. Feng picked out a bowl of pigeon eggs and put it on Granny Liu's desk.
When Grandma Jia said "please" here, Grandma Liu stood up and said loudly, "Lao Liu, Lao Liu, eat like a cow, and don't look up after eating an old sow." I drum my cheeks and don't talk.
They were stunned at first, and then they burst out laughing up and down. Shi Xiangyun couldn't stay up and spit out a mouthful of rice; Lin Daiyu was angry with a smile and fell on the table. Baoyu rolled into the old lady's arms early, and the old lady smiled and hugged Baoyu, calling him "sweetheart"; Mrs. Wang smiled and pointed at Xifeng, unable to speak. Aunt Xue couldn't hold on, and the tea in her mouth sprayed on Tanchun's skirt. Tanchun's rice bowls are all on Yingchun; Cherish the spring got up from his seat, pulling his nurse called rub intestines.
There is no one in the ground who doesn't hunch over. Some hide out and squat and laugh, and some endure laughter to change clothes for their sisters. Only with the support of Xifeng and Yuanyang can Granny Liu be allowed. Grandma Liu takes it.
6. Several ways to revise the composition A good composition comes from repeated revisions. "Chinese class is good, but the composition is difficult to change."
1, according to the outline modification method. After completing the draft composition, students can be asked to check and compare the writing outlines listed before the composition one by one, delete the materials that are inconsistent with the outlines, supplement the missing contents, and enrich the key parts that should be highlighted.
2. Self-revision and self-evaluation method. "The ultimate goal: self-study, not waiting for the teacher's comments; I can write my own composition without waiting for the teacher to correct it. Teacher training must achieve these two points, which is the success of teaching. "This is a brilliant exposition of composition teaching by Mr. Ye Shengtao, a famous educator in China.
3. Mutual correction method. "I don't know the true face of Lushan Mountain, but toward which corner of the mountain." Mr. Ye Shengtao, a famous educator, once said: "Teachers' revisions are not as good as students' own revisions. Students' personal revision is not as good as * * * revision. "Some students can't achieve the best results when revising their compositions. The reason is either that their knowledge is narrow, or that they only look at the composition from their own perspective.
4. Cooling correction method. After the article was written, I tried my best to write it, so I wanted to revise it, but I felt I couldn't write it. At this time, I can put away my written composition. Students' understanding of something 1 always deepens with the increase of knowledge. Therefore, after writing your composition, if you put it aside and let 1 read it by yourself, you can objectively find out what needs to be revised in your composition. Revising the composition at this time will often get good results.
5. Modify face to face. After browsing the students' compositions, teachers adopt the method of teaching students in accordance with their aptitude, and take turns to determine the object of face-to-face criticism and correction of students' compositions.
6, sampling correction method. The teacher divided the class's compositions into several categories according to their quality and revised them carefully. In the composition review class, review the original and revised articles. After listening, students compare and discuss, and talk about the differences before and after review. Where is this better? What do you think can be changed? Finally, the teacher made a summary. This method saves time and gains a lot more than seriously correcting the composition of the whole class.
There are many ways to modify the composition, such as comparison, expansion, condensation, recitation, circulation and copying. As long as it helps to improve students' writing level, all the above methods can be used flexibly.
7. I revised my composition with my parents (400 words for the fifth grade composition). The memories cherished in my heart these two days are unforgettable. The memory of living with my mother is also unforgettable. Every memory will make me sweeter than eating honey. I have a mother who loves me. My mother is a simple, kind and hardworking person. My mother helps me cook every day. Actually, her mother is. Later, because my father was busy at work, my mother became the chef of our family. My father and I both think that my mother's cooking is not delicious. Obviously, my mother was very sad, but after countless studies and attempts by her mother, she was finally able to cook delicious food. My mother goes home early to cook every day. When I come back late, I will lose my temper and think. I should be considerate of my mother, but my mother was silent. Don't dispute anything with me. I know my mother loves me, so I can't do anything for her. When my mother comes back from hard work and is busy cooking at home, there will always be funny things. Either she doesn't turn on the switch when cooking, or she burns or breaks dishes and bowls. The funniest thing is that when her mother was copying vegetables, she took water from the tap and drank the remaining water. Mom was so busy that she forgot everything. At this moment, I felt a pang of bitterness in my nose, and my tears almost fell! "For a while, I was with my mother. I didn't want the relationship between my mother and my daughter, but I chatted with her and went out to play together like good friends. Another time, I bickered with my mother and had a good time. My mother doesn't look like an elder at all. She is very kind and concerned about me in front of me. She is always nagging me everywhere. But I know my mother is nagging. Mom, I know your pains. I will make myself get excellent grades, repay you well when I grow up and make your life happy. Mom, I love you. Your kindness to me will always reverberate in my mind, and I will always remember this wonderful memory.