In 2006, Shanghai College Entrance Examination got full marks in Chinese composition.

2006 China Best College Entrance Examination Full Score Composition

2006 college entrance examination Shanghai volume

65438+2008 10 month

[Original title playback]

Composition.

Write an article on the topic "I want to hold your hand".

Requirements: (1) not less than 800 words.

(2) don't write poetry.

(3) Don't disclose personal information in the article.

[Explanation of title]

The topic "I want to hold your hand" in the Chinese composition of the college entrance examination in Shanghai this year is a requirement for propositional composition. It is kind and plain, seemingly shallow, but in fact it is still a continuation of the propositional thinking of Chinese test papers in Shanghai college entrance examination in recent years, which embodies profound ideological connotation.

Judging from the title, this is a complete sentence with complete subject, predicate and object, which clearly describes one thing, that is, why "I" (the examinee) "want to hold your hand". The focus of article writing is on the word "Xiang". Why "think"? How to "think" is the focus of the article. Think clearly about these key questions when you conceive: who is "you", write one "you" or write several "you"? Why do you hold your hand, that is, what is behind your back? Since we want to shake hands, we must have something to say. What mood is it? Or is there any knowledge about life to exchange?

The topic is "I shake hands". What is the reason for wanting to shake hands? This is where the article wants to shine and write lavishly-admired by people's manners; Be moved by people's words; Impressed by people's image and demeanor; A kind of praise arises spontaneously from people's will quality ... In short, it is to write that oneself is touching, admirable, touching and respectful ... There are many things that can be written, and the scope is wide, but the wonderful theme of the article is "I want to shake hands"-I want to shake hands, but I haven't. This is a process that has never been implemented. In other words, the writer knows the author but has no real acquaintances, and getting along is just the beginning; Or get along well, but let the author open his heart and tell him that he is rarely respected. You can write an unexpected emotion, or a little respect from a long-term relationship, but you are not completely close to the protagonist ... On the surface, you write about people and things, but I think it is more about spiritual communication, inner purification and monologue, and the writer's own subjective feelings.

Stylistically speaking, nature is very open. There are rational and reasonable essays, complex narratives with sincere feelings, argumentative essays with a little lyrical color, and even novel and tortuous novels or scripts.

Throughout this year's Shanghai college entrance examination composition questions, there are several characteristics, such as great openness, requiring candidates to express their true feelings in real words, easy to write and difficult to shine. These characteristics represent a direction of the development of college entrance examination composition proposition, which candidates should pay attention to in 2007.

[Full score composition 1]

i want to hold your hand

A candidate in Shanghai

The truth is nothing more than shaking hands!

-inscription

The door left unlocked creaked a crack, and dad leaned into half his head to look in. It's just dawn, and my roommate may be asleep. I just woke up, huddled up and covered my face with a quilt. Yes, it's dad!

Red, a big bunch of carnations, I was shocked. That day, dad was still wearing his white overalls and his hair was messy. Maybe it was windy outside. The fog in the early morning wet the ends of his hair, and there seemed to be traces of wind on his face, which looked much more vicissitudes than before. However, I still can't help laughing. Dad looks clumsy and funny. His whole dress doesn't match the big bunch of carnations on his chest. I have always thought that flowers should have some romance and sentiment. Dad came up to me, and I grinned and hid in the corner of the quilt. "Oh, I woke up." Dad's surprised expression let me know how much I like sleeping in. "Yeah, but Dad, are these flowers for me?" I'm still a little skeptical. Dad was a little nervous about this question. His hands kept changing flowers, his face flushed and he nodded in confusion. "Yesterday, your mother and I discussed what to buy. Later, your mother said that you like carnations. Early in the morning, I went to the flower shop to pick some flowers, but the owner packed them too brightly ... "Dad stopped. He may really not be used to this occasion of sending flowers.

Dad rummaged through the drawers and finally found a vase for arranging flowers, which was very dirty. Before I could speak, my father had put down the flowers and trotted out. I looked at that big bunch of red carnations, but somehow I was moved. I remembered the day of the accident, my mother's panic and my father's calmness. I broke my leg because I was careless when riding a bike. At that time, I only remembered a sharp pain, and my legs could not be lifted any more. The emergency room of the hospital is on the fourth floor, and the elevator is crowded with people. I know my parents decided to go to the emergency room because they were worried about my serious illness. Dad hurried upstairs behind my back without stopping. Lying on my father's shoulder, I clearly saw the sweat on his face. Dad's body is very thin, but I obviously felt his strength when he carried me. On the fourth floor, I don't know how many steps there are in that long corridor, and I didn't see my dad panting after taking me to the emergency room. This is by no means an easy road ... Dad came in with a vase and a simple and honest smile on his face. At that moment, I wanted to cry. People say that simple love is the greatest. I suddenly realized that my father had never given me great love. My story with him is not as vigorous as that in the movie. In my childhood, his love gave a kite flying high in March, a small crucian carp with black eyes … I grew up little by little surrounded by warmth.

I don't know when my father has planted carnations, and a person is stupidly arranging the order of each flower. Left, right, up, down. I stared at him quietly, feeling the blessing of the morning in the room. On the petals, a drop of dew slipped. In subtle emotions, carnations also know how to shed tears for me.

..... I gradually fell asleep, and in a daze, a pair of little hands gently held my hand. I didn't open my eyes, but tears finally ran down my face.

[Teacher's comment] The highlights of this article are as follows:

1. The author skillfully sets the situation and conveys such a profound thought in ordinary and touching details: true feelings are nothing more than shaking hands and making peace!

Second, the story begins with a small scene: my father came to the hospital with a big bunch of red carnations, which looked clumsy and funny. Dad was a little nervous when I asked him "You gave me these flowers". His hands kept changing flowers, his face flushed and he nodded in confusion. Next, Dad explained why he bought flowers, washed the vase for arranging flowers and put them in. "Han Han is arranging the order of each flower", "I" was moved, but "tears finally spilled all over my face". This enlightens us that my father gently held my hand and spread the word "I" affectionately. It was our family that made us shake hands.

Third, the scene of this article is simple and grand, the plot is concentrated and turbulent, the language is concise and rich in connotation, the mental journey of the characters is clearly visible, and some details are particularly excellent.

[key dialysis]

basis

The grade meets the meaning of the question.

The article starts with a small scene, and the author grasps it well.

Sincere feelings

The article told me that my father came to the hospital to send me flowers, and I was very moved. This is the power of family.

develop

grade

Deep? incise

Go deep into the essence through the phenomenon

From a bunch of red carnations, we can explore deeper and broader connotations and have depth.

Rich