There is a saying that:
There is a basic formula for liking someone.
It is very unlikely that we can judge whether this person is a good person by first impression or feeling, because most people don't have such a strong power to see through people's hearts, so what we can do is to judge a person from his appearance first.
Looking at the appearance, some people will feel superficial, but when we don't know this person, we can get information to judge that this person is his appearance.
If one looks sloppy and the other looks clean and tidy, who do you want to get close to?
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Yan value is in command.
Wu said to:
No one doesn't like beautiful things, so handsome men and beautiful women are the goals pursued by many people.
A person's appearance reflects a person's temperament and lifestyle.
A person's appearance determines whether many people want to get close to him, but close to this person, the connotation of this person determines whether other people like this person, or whether this person belongs to the object of frequent communication.
Is it really superficial to just look at the appearance? For us now, we have entered an era, and we pay more attention to personal image than ever before.
Job seekers may do micro-plastic surgery to make themselves look better.
When you go to an interview, you will pay special attention to clothes, put on professional clothes and show your professionalism.
Wearing different clothes on different occasions and how a person dresses up represent how he pays attention to his upcoming occasion.
Not everyone is born with a high face value and a low face value. In order to make themselves look more professional and better, they must seek a direction that conforms to the public's aesthetics through other channels.
02
The attraction of the opposite sex
I once read a sentence:
People with high face value are always more likely to attract the attention of other opposite sex, and even have more opportunities for the opposite sex to talk than others.
In this attractive neighborhood, high face value is the primary choice goal, but then the other person's talk and lifestyle will affect whether another person likes this person.
The most important thing is that the three views should be consistent and the three views are inconsistent. No matter what difficulties will be encountered in conversation or life, two people have different values. Even if they know what life they want, they may feel limited everywhere because the other person disagrees.
A woman is not afraid of suffering, but of marrying a man with a bad heart.
Ang Lee's wife, Lin Huijia, holds a doctorate in biology from the University of Illinois, and Ang Lee holds a master's degree from the Film Academy of new york University. On education, Ang Lee lost to his wife.
When they graduated, Ang Lee's wife got a job, and Ang Lee hit a brick wall and became a handyman.
Before Ang Lee became famous, he worked as a family chef for six years, relying on his wife to support his family, but her wife didn't complain, supported his movie dream, and didn't feel that she had married the wrong person.
Lin Huijia's wife said, "If you don't make it look like a dead man, I don't want a dead husband."
On one occasion, under the pressure of reality, Ang Lee wanted to study computer. His wife bluntly said: There are so many people studying computer, and Ang Lee is not the only one.
Ang Lee has been trying hard to write plays and do a good job in housework during his six years in hibernation, not to hold his wife back.
His wife's support made Ang Lee's famous director dream come true, but Ang Lee didn't treat housework as a big man, which earned him the respect of his wife.
This is why many people don't want to choose a viable marriage, because a good partner can help you grow, while an unsuitable partner is to limit your life everywhere.
The reason is that the other person doesn't agree with your values and doesn't understand your thoughts. He will use his own ideas to judge whether your behavior is right or wrong, but when he feels that your behavior is different from his values, what he will do is to stop you.
High face value can attract people, but whether two people can get along with each other and whether they can tolerate and respect each other is the key to a long-term relationship.
03
Talent is better than face value
Jimmy Lin said:
Priscilla Chan, the wife of Facebook founder mark zuckerberg, looks ordinary and doesn't like makeup, but she has become her husband's idol. When his wife was pregnant, he once said, "Because his wife is so excellent, there should be more such women in the world."
In the eyes of ordinary people, his wife's face value is not enough, only talent far exceeds others.
Priscilla Chan is a refugee from China. After her parents made money, she opened a Chinese restaurant "Asian flavor". She set goals in life when she was in high school. She wants to be admitted to Harvard Medical School, because she is a junior in mark zuckerberg, and they have the opportunity to meet.
At that time, mark zuckerberg became a school celebrity because of his website. He envied Priscilla Chen being admitted to Harvard's most difficult medical school. I also felt very congenial in the chat, so I started to associate.
What made him a fan of his wife completely was that he dropped out of school to start a business, and his wife gave him encouragement and help, and he also got a place in his entrepreneurial team. But after the success of Facebook, his wife became a primary school teacher because she wanted to pursue her dream and become a pediatrician. Later, his wife went to medical school at the University of California, San Francisco.
Let him always be infatuated with his wife and not be tempted by other beautiful women, that is, his wife's talent has surpassed other women. He likes his wife who pursues his dreams, and he also likes his wife who supports his business. This independence and high emotional intelligence attracted him deeply.
After marriage, the two tried to live a low-key and simple family life, and at the same time did not forget to do charity. He and his wife spent most of their wealth on charity.
Paying attention to face value doesn't mean being superficial, it just makes me see you in the vast sea of people and then want to be close to you.
Yan value is important, but the three views are more important, and the three views are inconsistent. Even if you have beautiful skin, it won't make people feel excited.