At that time, Xingyi City gave me two words, one is "hot" and the other is "old". The reason why I say this is entirely because eight years ago, I wore a heavy cotton-padded jacket and took a day's train to that city in early April. At that time, I was crowded in a train car full of people and couldn't move a step.
This is my first trip in my life. I am very excited. I am eager to meet my friends. When I got off the train at Weishe Station and changed to a bus, the sight of bare rocks and loess all the way really shocked my heart. I didn't think there was such a poor and desolate area in southwest Guizhou.
When we arrived in Xingyi, it was already seven o'clock in the evening. Because my friend couldn't come for a while, I asked for directions all the way down the street. In this way, I finally took off my cotton-padded jacket and only wore a short sleeve. I don't understand why this place is so hot and sweaty at night, and it's early April.
After waiting for my friend, my friend showed me around after dinner. Seeing those low buildings and dark streets, I couldn't help asking her, is Xingyi like this? Her answer is simple. She said that the city is not big and there are many old houses. It will take at least ten years to change.
In the next two days, my friends and fellow villagers took me around for a day. However, because we had some problems at that time, we really didn't have a happy day. I can't even remember the names of the places I have been.
All I can remember about that trip to Xingyi is that she sent me to the station to wait for the bus. Then, we sat in the waiting room and ate melon seeds for two hours. She didn't leave, and neither did I. Even melon seeds have been eaten. Because the melon seeds bought won the lottery and changed seven bags in a row, the owner of the station canteen was afraid of us.
It's just that sometimes, you have to leave when you have to. But when I was leaving, she said that if I came back later, she would definitely take me to Wan Fenglin. But when I saw her red face through the window, I didn't look away. When the car drove away, my tears came down. ...
When I stood on the steps in front of Weishe Station and looked back, I wrote this poem, "I stood in a strange and spacious square, waiting for the late train to bid farewell to the bloody sunset." I clenched the crumpled ticket, secretly turned around, and then stepped onto the high ladder. But I can't see the person who saw me off! "Of course, this short poem cannot express my extremely complicated thoughts at that time. All I remember is that I waited for four hours at the station of Weishe, then took a sleepless train back to my city, and then we began to lose touch.
In the past eight years, because I chose to stay away, my involvement gradually decreased. She's only been married for a week, and my life has suffered setbacks. I don't want to say too much about the reasons for this setback. At least this depressing day can finally come to an end after a year of confusion. I don't want to entangle too many things, because I am willing to fulfill it, just as I fulfilled her.
In April this year, the unit arranged for me and several other colleagues to study in Xingyi. It was already evening when I arrived in Xingyi from the high-speed train at two o'clock in the afternoon, and I walked for nine hours. When I entered Xingyi, I was completely blinded and couldn't understand the city at all.
This city is no longer what it used to be. It has beautiful nights and there are many buildings and overpasses between them. Sitting in the car, I tried to find traces of that year, but I couldn't find anything. I couldn't help but feel lost.
That night, I asked myself more than once, is it because of my current state of mind, or because I can't meet her in this city, and no one can answer me. Of course, I don't want to disturb her, because I really don't want her to know my current situation and whether my life is good or bad.
In the past eight years, we have all suffered too many changes and tried to get close to one place. But in the vast sea of people, since those things have passed, we all seem to tacitly choose not to bother, and I choose to cherish them more. Perhaps, not disturbing each other, this is also a kind of beauty!
When I arrived in Wan Fenglin that day, I didn't see the clear sky in Wan Li, only a heavy rain and misty rain. I stood on the observation deck, looking at the clusters of peaks in the distance, thinking about what she said in those years, what she experienced with her, and even many things after coming back from Xingyi in those years.
After all, in the rush of time, those past events have become pieces and can never be pieced together. On the day I left Xingyi, I was still drunk, but my heart was happy. Just maybe it's because people are old. After I came back from Xingyi, I always remember the things of that year, the people and things related to her in those years.
It's just that I can't remember much after all. Too many changes have taken place in eight years, so that someone summed me up with the phrase "your past, a page of the sea, a page of mulberry fields". In fact, in eight years, I also complained about others, and I still don't understand why God played such a trick.
Perhaps it is because people grow up and mature that I find myself naive, arrogant and ignorant. So I decided to rearrange the story of meeting her ten years ago. It's not that I still miss anything, but that I think I should learn to precipitate, precipitate the years, precipitate my so-called persistence. In life, after all, some things can't be done or forced.
Then let everything, including the past and present, precipitate in that year's time, precipitate in Xingyi city, which I can't find anyway. Just like the stealing wind in this city tonight, the sudden heavy rain in this city can make me sleep quietly and change my mood after waking up.
Because I once met you, I changed my mood without wine, poetry and so much loss. Only a quiet heart, after getting up every morning and quietly reading a few pages, began to yearn for the future life of this city. Because let that city stay in time and memory, I will never go back, and then I won't bother you again.