Life needs humor, these funny jokes will tell you what the joy of life is. What is the true image of this world. Next is the "Classic Funny Script" that I carefully prepared for you, welcome to watch!

Classic Funny Script (Popular)

1. During class, the teacher asked:? Which of the voltages of 11 volts, 30 volts, 220 volts, 1000 volts and 3500 volts can be touched and which cannot be touched? Student: You can touch them all, but some can only be touched once. ?

2. I want to get a haircut, but I don’t know which chef is better to choose. Choose the one with the worst hair style! Well, his hair style shows that at least he is not the least skilled. ?(@雷英儿)

3. How to translate this sentence into a noble, elegant and connotative way? Hey, buddy! If you have something to say, then say! If you have nothing to say, then go!? Correct answer: ?Everyone loves you, if you have something to do, you will start to play, but if you have nothing to do, you will retreat?

4. The mobile phone is so cute, it has attracted countless heroes to bend their backs, sparing no money and loving Sharp, which is just an illusion. Motorola, obsessed with knives. A generation of genius, Nokia Empire, only knows how to sell big money in shells. It’s all over, there are many famous people, iPhone is the most popular!

5. In a certain place where family planning was carried out, an old lady took the place of her daughter-in-law to prevent her daughter-in-law from wearing the contraceptive ring, and she became the fourth. Doctor Shi said to his daughter-in-law: Old lady, you have already been in the hospital, and if you do it again, you will become an Audi.

6. A teacher said: This sentence from the era of naked marriage: I have no car, no money, no house, no diamond ring, but I have a heart to accompany you until you grow old. The degree of unreliability is similar to: Although I didn't read, didn't go to class, didn't review, and didn't do the questions, I had the determination not to fail the exam. The biggest misunderstanding about love is that it is omnipotent.

7. The mother tells her son a story: There are two people, a man and a woman. They walk side by side every day, but they cannot talk to each other. Even turning to look at each other is a luxury. . . The child interrupted his mother and asked: Are you talking about the two news broadcasts?

8. Suddenly remembered an advertising slogan, to be no.1. Doesn't it mean two B no.1?

9. When I was in elementary school, I thought the latest time in the world was half past nine. When I went to middle school, I found that it was still past ten o'clock. In high school, I thought it was eleven. If you don’t sleep at 30:30, you will die the next day. Now I will curl my lips contemptuously. It’s only after twelve o’clock!

10. A boy asked the coach: “Coach, I fell in love with someone on Weibo.” Friend, but I'm not sure if he is a woman. ?Is TA’s avatar two-dimensional? ?What is the gender of TA on Weibo? ?Give up, Sao Nian, that guy is 100% gay. ? Classic funny joke script (classic)

1. I went home at night and heard crying in the alley. When I looked closer, I saw that it was a disheveled woman crying. Asked what happened, the lady replied: "I was violated by a pervert!" Me: "Are you okay?" The lady replied: "He suddenly grabbed my breast from behind and then let me go." I said: "Then why are you crying?" The lady replied: Because. . . The pervert actually said, "What a bad luck, I actually hugged a man?"

2. A man went out to find trouble, shouting everywhere, "Who dares to mess with me?" Finally, a strong man stopped him, "I dare?" . The man looked at it and immediately stood next to the strong man, Who dares to mess with us!?

3. I made up my mind to start losing weight today and said to my husband: From tomorrow on, I will only eat bananas for dinner. And pineapple!!? As a result, my husband replied calmly:? Elephants also grew up eating these? Me?

4. The three mice tasted American, Japanese, and Chinese wines! One drank After drinking the American wine, he took three steps and poured it down! After the other drank the Japanese wine, he took two steps and poured it down! After the last one drank the Chinese Erguotou, he picked up a kitchen knife and shouted: Damn it! Where is the cat? < /p>

5. My friend was talking about his naturally stupid wife. He said: Wife, where is the capital of Belarus? She: Ukraine? He: Well, let me tell you, the capital of Belarus is Belarus Moscow; Then she believed it?

6. Question: Americans will become... when they need to urinate. . . Answer: Jiang Guoren!!!

7. I am going to visit a new customer today. I called him and asked him where he was. The answer: ? At McDonald’s. ?I said a polite word just to be polite: ?Hey, bro, what is something delicious to eat? I can smell the aroma. ?The other party replied: ?They are queuing up in the bathroom!?

8. The doctor said to the patient who was going to have the surgery: ?This operation has some risks. If it fails, it will cause paralysis of the left side of your body. ?The patient touched the lifeblood with his hand? Doctor:?What are you doing? Patient:?I just moved it to the right. ?

9. The company holds a celebration party in the evening. There was a sudden power outage and I didn’t want to stop. So I bought a large bundle of candles and started opening them.

Halfway through the drive, the boss seemed to think of something and asked: Does anyone have a birthday today? A colleague thought it was a good thing and quickly raised his hand: "Boss, it's my birthday, it's my birthday!" The boss said: "Okay" , after we finish the meeting, you are responsible for blowing out all the candles!?

10. A certain girl’s signature? The Christmas song is updated every year, and this year’s one is also very catchy ╮(╯▽╰ )╭~~single boy, single boy, single all the way, having party together, and turning into gay. HEY! Classic funny scripts (selected chapters)

1. I met a guy on the trading floor Madam, she said: China's stock market is a bit like an impotent husband. Abandon him, it's a bit reluctant to let him go; stay together, you will be annoyed every day. Serve him with delicious food and drinks, hoping that he will be able to get some yang energy. Just when he saw his erection and before he took off his clothes, he already couldn't do it. The key is that you just put on your clothes and prepared to have an affair, and he pulled you behind and said, "You have a reaction, you have a reaction, just wait a minute!!"

2. March 8th of a certain year: A beautiful woman swam ashore, and everyone was watching! She was so airy, did she think she had never seen a beautiful woman before? Suddenly she realized something was wrong. It turned out that she had lost her swimming trunks at some point, and her beauty was revealed. In desperation, she took the wooden board by the swimming pool to cover her shame, and everyone snickered! Urgent! Look, the wooden board says "This is dangerous, the water is two meters deep." He quickly discards it and replaces it with another one, and everyone laughs! He quickly reads "Only for men" and changes it again, and everyone laughs! He lowers his head and looks again, and immediately passes out. Content "Free for all on Men's Day"

3. Yesterday, a friend told me about the best guy he met: No matter how much he weighs, he can fool around calmly. For example, this person’s computer knowledge is limited to turning a computer on and off. Once, I went to a customer to demonstrate software products. I was stunned for a long time but didn't turn on the computer, so I said lightly: Hey, Microsoft was hacked again today. (@张晓南)

4. One day during class, a text message flew into my cell phone. The key is that my cell phone is set to automatically read text messages with voice: Girl, uncle is pregnant, what do you think? Not yours

5. Yesterday, a SB young man sitting in front of me yelled: "Is my calculator broken?" One times one equals one? Suddenly the whole group was in a mess

6. The first line: If you stay in a house for a long time, you will naturally stay in a daze. The second line: If you stay in the deep place, you will naturally become cute. Horizontal comment: Stay in the dormitory less often.

7. Guo'er, where is your carving (carving card)? Auntie, it is now fully automatic with Mystery. ?

8. I had to go on a business trip and I said to my daughter when I left in the morning: "Baby, come on, kiss daddy." My daughter ignored me, so I continued to plead with her again, and my wife also advised, "Baby, daddy." I'm going on a business trip today, so why don't you kiss him? ?I continued to beg. Come on, baby, kiss daddy? Finally my daughter reluctantly kissed me. Then she said something impatient to her mother: "Your husband is really squeamish..."

9. Girl: "Dad, do you have any scary books for me to read?" Dad: There is a book that I bought more than 20 years ago. It’s so scary, so I rarely read it. ? Little girl: ?What book? Dad said seriously: ?Marriage certificate!?

10. There are three kinds of people in the iPhone world: authorities, sources, and insiders who wish to remain anonymous. Three things in the Android world: The king of mobile phones, the top configuration, will be launched soon. Three stories in the Symbian world: past glory, dying struggle, and disappearing brand.

Three highlights of the copycat world: N-card N-band, ultra-long standby, Phoenix legend... Click on the next page for more exciting classic funny scripts