Manager, male, 37-year-old Lucy kellaway's answer You must choose which is more important to you: having a good personal assistant or doing it right? If you have basic common sense, you will realize that the first point is more important-and much more important. If you think it's more important that you do it right, then you don't know how to compromise and can't be the boss at all. If so, it is not surprising that she threatened to resign. Maybe she doesn't like her job very much. The minor question of whether you are really right is not so clear. You didn't say where she needed surgery, probably because you didn't know either. But if so, don't ask or even think about it. Your problem has caused enough harm. For example, if she decides to have a nose job because she thinks she will look better, then she should really take this holiday as a holiday. On the other hand, she may argue that her big nose hinders her mental health, so this kind of operation is as necessary as other operations-but on the whole, I am on your side on this issue. A good chance to get rid of her. You did yourself a big favor. This woman may have some ability, but even if she is not completely dishonest, she is disloyal and deceptive. She is not ashamed of her behavior, but threatens you. You're lucky to get rid of her. You may be curious, but if you ask, you may have broken the law. Most countries have laws to protect privacy. According to these laws, an employee who asks for sick leave must show a hospitalization certificate, but he is not required to give reasons. You screwed up your relationship with her. Apologize and send flowers to the hospital. Risk teacher, female, 36-year-old beauty (more beautiful) This is really shameless, but I think you can only bear it. She is holding you back because it is difficult to find a good personal assistant. Let her have plastic surgery and clean herself up. After the swelling is completely reduced, she will become a more beautiful landscape in the office, so it is also a good thing for you.